


Red String

by Waxwing



Category: Split (2016)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/M, Gaslighting, Incest, Kidnapping, M/M, Multi, Murder, Pack Dynamics, Past Child Abuse, Self-Harm, Statutory Rape
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:27:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 36
Words: 67,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24435841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Waxwing/pseuds/Waxwing
Summary: At 15 Dennis kills his mother. At 21 he's released from the mental asylum. At 30 he starts looking for his soul mates.ORAn A/B/O AU in which Barry and Casey both turn out to be Dennis's soul mates.
Relationships: Barry/Casey Cooke/Dennis, The Beast/Patricia (Split)
Comments: 200
Kudos: 61





	1. Frenzy

**Author's Note:**

> Nongraphic mentions of child abuse.

When Dennis was 15, he’d killed his mother. He’d been in the kitchen doing the dishes and she’d been on the phone with someone talking about her impending wedding. She’d been engaged for a year to a man that Dennis did not like (that’s all he remembers about him now) but now plans were being made and dates were being set and it was starting to look like it was actually happening. He doesn’t know what he’d expected... engagements usually ended in marriage, didn’t they? But hearing about the topic always made him incredibly anxious and this time he was holding a plate which he inadvertently squeezed until it shattered. 

Hearing the noise, his mother hung up the phone and began to shout at him. He’d cut his hand when he’d broken the plate and it was raining outside and she kept demanding to know what was wrong with him. When he didn’t answer she hit him (not even very hard, comparatively) on the back of the head and then something in him snapped. He doesn’t remember grabbing the steak knife from the dish drainer or putting it into her but he must have because there was no other way that he’d have found himself holding the handle while it was embedded in her stomach... her blood splattering out and warming his hand. He doesn’t remember how long he’d stayed in the house with the body but he does remember that when some men came to take it away he flew into a sort of panic. 

Dr. Fletcher would explain to him much later through the bulletproof glass at the prison that based on the details she’d been able to gather this was likely a ‘defensive alpha frenzy.’ USUALLY, it’s an instinctive reaction alpha’s have to the omega to whom they’re bonded being physically threatened. The fact that he’d experienced one in response to his mother’s dead body being hauled away would eventually help his insanity plea. That and the scars he had all over his torso because the jury found it difficult to believe that anyone would do that to THEMSELVES. It probably also helped that when the doctor who’d examined him was called as a witness and he started pointing out where the scars were on a diagram, Dennis had a panic attack (no aggression this time, just hyperventilating and vomiting) and that Dennis had also had multiple panic attacks during the examination itself. 

Ultimately he’d been declared not guilty by reason of mental disease or defect and spent the next six years in an institution for the criminally insane. He’d had one doctor who’d seen him every day and Dr. Fletcher had come once a month and then there’d been Miss Patricia. She’d been allowed into the asylum to offer ‘spiritual counsel’ because she was a nun (only beta females are allowed to become nuns.) Eventually, she’d left the convent (or been made to leave the convent?) and when she’d come to see him for the last time he’d been very upset. He didn’t trust himself to be good without her help and so she’d given him permission to write to her. He would write her a detailed confession each week and she would write him back a much longer letter containing pertinent advice but also snippets of information that she’d picked up here and there. ‘You can collect cyanide by boiling old flypaper.’ 

He’d been 21 when they’d decided that he was fit to be released but he’d honestly been more nervous than relieved. He’d undergone ‘vocational therapy’ (they’d had him do custodial work around the asylum) but he still had no idea where exactly he would go or what he would do. He’d confided this to Miss Patricia and she had offered to let him stay with her. She had come into possession of a boarding house and would let him stay there for free in exchange for his maintaining the building. Even though he was supposed to be cured now he was still required to see Dr. Fletcher once a month and when he’d told her about the arrangement she’d asked him if maybe he was becoming a bit too reliant on surrogate mother figures... he hadn’t known what she meant by that but he’d told her that he’d think about it. 

He moves in with Miss Patricia and things settle into a comfortable pattern. She feeds him, houses him, and does his laundry and in exchange, he does maintenance and sanitation in the building, collects the rent, and makes sure people who don’t pay their rent leave without making too much of a fuss. Since the building is small the maintenance doesn’t keep him busy enough so he gets a part-time job in a warehouse. When he’s around 25 he starts to have recurring dreams about a little girl with dark hair and green eyes lost in a forest, being stalked by a monster. He wakes up terribly anxious but he can’t imagine why. When he’s 30, Dr. Fletcher tells him that she won’t be able to see him anymore. 

“You see, the state only pays me to continue treating you until they feel that you’ve successfully assimilated and by now they feel that you have.” 

“So yer not gonna’ talk ta’ me anymore?” 

He thinks she looks sad. 

“Well... that brings me to our next topic. The state will no longer allow me to treat you unless some event occurs in your life that could potentially have a drastic effect on your mental state. Then it would be necessary for me to continue to monitor the situation.” 

He arches a brow. 

“Dennis, I would like to talk to you about your soul marks.” 

“...I don’t have any.” 

His mother had carved the first one off of him with a razor blade when he was 12. When he was 15 another one had appeared and his mother had pressed a hot curling iron to it until it was unreadable. He can’t remember what either of them had said... the doctor thinks he may have ‘repressed’ them. 

“I have a college who is working on an experimental project that, using DNA technology, would be able to narrow down your prospective soul mates.” 

“...huh?” 

“It’s not a flawless process but I think that if we use that technology to narrow it down and then narrow it down further to people who have your first name as a soul mark and then have you scent some of their belongings, we may be able to find at least one of them assuming that they’re in this city.” 

“Why would they be here?” 

“Well, why wouldn’t they? You and they are drawn together by invisible, universal forces. Science has yet to explain them but there is ample evidence that they exist. So it would stand to reason that you and your soulmates would inevitably wind up physically near eachother.” 

Dennis supposes that this makes sense but he’s still not sure. Would they even WANT him to find them? He didn’t think that they would if they knew that he was a CRIMINALLY INSANE MURDERER but... he wanted to keep seeing Dr. Fletcher and... maybe his soulmates wouldn’t even be involved in this. It would come up blank and then Dr. Fletcher could claim to be counseling him through his disappointment. No harm done. He thinks about the little girl in the woods, how old had she been? How old is she now? He bets not old enough to be participating in a soulmate locating experiment. 

“So... I give you my DNA?” 

“I would need a sample of your saliva to send to him so that they could compare your DNA with that of the other participants in the experiment and then we could go from there.” 

“...ok.” 

\------ 

A few months later, Dennis arrives at his doctor’s office to find 7 plastic bags, each with an item in it. They are tagged with numbers each of which is assigned to another participant in the experiment. It takes Dennis a while to get through them because he hates touching other people’s things, especially dirty clothing which some of the items are. He’s told to pick the one that he thinks smells best which is a tall task since most of them smell foul or not at all. The final item is a grey knit cap. When he puts it near his face and inhales his stomach twists into knots and his heart flutters and his mouth waters a little. 

The following month she has a manilla envelope for him. 

“Alright, now in this envelope is a picture of your prospective soul mate along with his answers to the questionnaire that I had you take last month.” 

“It got narrowed down ta’ just one.” 

“Yes, only one of the other participants in the experiment matches your genetic signature and selected your item based on its scent.” 

He feels a little embarrassed at the mention of the item. She needed something that came into direct contact with his skin (he has no hair) and the only thing he’d been able to think of was one of his tank tops. He’d wanted to wash it first but she’d said he shouldn’t. 

“You’re not under any obligation to meet with this person but if you’d like to we can set up an appointment or arrange for the two of you to speak over the phone first if you’d be more comfortable with that.” 

He would not... he’s no good on the phone. He takes a deep breath, opens the envelope, and pulls out a photo of... a MALE omega. His name is Barry, he is currently working as a barista while he earns his degree in fashion design. Nothing about him is what Dennis would have expected but one thing stands out. 

“This is a man.” 

“Yes... I understand that you may have some reservations but I want you to take the photograph home with you and spend the next month just THINKING about this and remember that even if you meet with him you still have no obligation to do anything more. You could meet him once and then never see him again. I just want you to think before you decide.” 

Dennis takes the photo back home with him. Much later when he’s alone in his room he takes it out and looks at it in the dim light of his bedside lamp.


	2. OK.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry trades a vile of spit for a tote bag and then gets an envelope in the mail.

Two months after Barry gave a sample of his spit to someone working a booth on the campus of his college in exchange for a free tote bag (that Jade would later take to use as a gym bag) and one month after he gets called into a lab to smell a series of shirts, get his picture taken and fill out a questionnaire, a manilla envelope arrives in the mail. Barry is in the middle of a phone call when he gets the mail that day so he just throws it on the table beside the front door without bothering to go through it. It’s later swept into the junk drawer under the table by Orwell who is hastily preparing the house to have some of his colleges from the university over for coffee. A couple of days later Orwell goes back into the drawer looking for a piece of correspondence that another college who lives out of state was supposed to have sent him. Noting that the envelope looks important and is addressed to Barry, he puts it on Barry’s bed. 

Later that evening, Barry and Jade brush the envelope off of the bed so that they can have sex. Jade waits until Barry falls asleep after to go to Orwell’s room and then, finding Orwell asleep as well, goes to her own room. Barry awakes at nearly noon the next day (as is his habit on Saturdays) and slips on the envelope on his way to the bedroom door. Still groggy, he picks it up and tucks it into his sketchbook which he carries into the kitchen with him. Orwell will have already been awake for hours by now and will be in his study. He teaches a class at a university on the other side of the city three days a week and spends the rest of the time compiling information for books that the university pays him to write because apparently that’s what history professors do when they aren’t giving lectures. By the fact that the coffee pot is still over half full, Barry deduces that Jade must not be up yet. 

Barry pours himself a cup, adds a splash of milk and a tablespoon of sugar, and sits down at the table. He opens his sketchbook to begin working and finds the envelope about which he had already forgotten by now. He furrows his brow at the logo on it, trying to remember where he’s seen it before, and then he remembers the tote bag (which Jade left on the bus a few days ago along with her fit bit and second-best sports bra) and then where he’d gotten the tote bag. He sets the envelope aside and for a while just sketches and sips his coffee. He’s a little surprised by the envelope because when he’d decided to participate in the experiment he had assumed that it’d just wind up not working and he’d eventually receive a form letter about it being inconclusive. 

This envelope is too big to just be a form letter and that makes him hesitant to open it. He’s always assumed that the whole soulmate thing COULDN’T be scientifically quantified, that it was just one of the great mysteries of the universe and had more to do with destiny or fate or whatever than biology but... well... he’d apparently gotten some sort of result. Ultimately his curiosity wins out over his fear of toying with fate (or destiny or whatever) and he opens it. He’s not surprised that it’s a ‘Dennis’ because Dennis has been on his left side, following the curve of his rib cage, since he was 13; Jade is just above his right clavicle, and Casey is on the back of his left shoulder. He and Jade had wound up in the same foster home as tweens and had bonded basically the instant they began puberty. 

Jade had met Jalin and Luke (who are on her right side along her ribs) in highschool and Orwell (who is under her left breast) when she came to campus with Barry one day and snuck into his guest lecture. She’d found the lecture boring but had loved the sound of his voice and how he gestured with his hands. She’d cornered him in the library after the lecture and asked what else he could do with those hands. He goes back and forth between the house where he lives with Jade and Barry and the apartment he shares with Rakel; a ballerina who has duel citizenship in both America and France where her other soul mate Bernice lives with HER other soul mate Ian whom she met on a trip to Scotland where his sister Marry still resides with her only soulmate Goddard and their 6 children (people with only one soul mate tend to have a lot of children.) Considering all that Barry finds it hard to believe that anything other than the invisible hand of fate (or destiny or whatever) could be behind how and when a person meets their soulmate... he’d also feel just a little short-changed if his two remaining unfound soulmates just happened to live in the city where he was born. 

If the science behind the genetics experiment turns out to be legit, though, at least one of them lives right here in Philadelphia (it doesn’t get more specific than that in case Dennis would rather not meet Barry.) Dennis is a ‘maintenance and sanitation engineer’ with a GED who is 6’9” and 250 pounds (JEEESUS!) of what looks like pure muscle. Barry thinks that he looks like the picture from his high school health class textbook that illustrated the differences between alphas and omegas by showing extreme examples of both. He has the blocky build, the thick neck, the square jaw, even the vaguely hostile expression. Going by his face you’d guess that he was either annoyed at having his picture taken or suspected that the cameraman was up to something. The textbook illustration hadn't had glasses and a buzz cut though. 

Barry wonders if maybe this is some kind of elaborate joke. Like, maybe they sent this picture to every omega in the ‘experiment’ and found a picture of some equally stereotypical looking omega to send to all the alphas. Still, he finds himself reading on; he and Dennis’s ‘genetic signifiers’ match up (there’s even a picture taken through an electron microscope) and Dennis had picked his hat out of items taken from him and 6 other candidates... Barry had only had 3 other candidates. He goes back to the photograph and notices that Dennis’s eyes are an admittedly beautiful shade of blue-gray that he doesn’t think he’s seen on anyone else. The form says that Dennis's hair is brown but Barry idly wonders what shade of brown and if he could convince him to grow it out. He tells himself that nothing he thinks matters anyway because he doubts Dennis wants to meet him. The guy OOZES self-conscious heterosexuality. 

Still... he logs onto the site that the letter says he can use to set up a meeting with Dennis... just to confirm his suspicion... It turns out that Dennis does want to meet him and has for a WEEK now... How the hell long has this envelope been in the house and why didn’t anyone tell him about it when it got here? He quickly checks ‘yes’ which opens a window that gives him the option of sending a message. Dennis hadn’t bothered with a message, so why should he? He hears Jade stirring and realizes that he doesn’t feel like explaining the situation to her... especially since nothing will probably come of it. He hastily types ‘coffee?’ and then closes the browser and goes about his day. Later that evening, he goes back online just to confirm his suspicion that the guy would chicken out and not respond to his message but instead finds a terse reply: 

“OK.” 

And then roughly 20 minutes later. 

“Where?”


	3. Ethereal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dr. Fletcher reflects on how she met Dennis.  
> Dennis reflects on his past while waiting to meet Barry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of child abuse and molestation.

Since Dennis was under 18, he was given a psychiatric evaluation regardless of rather or not he asked for one. It was pure coincidence that his case found it’s way to Dr. Fletcher. The part of ‘coincidence’ being played here by a college of the doctor’s who’d been having difficulty making headway with Dennis. He had found Dennis to be very defensive and closed off but had a theory that he may be more willing to open up to a woman around the same age as his dead mother. If his suspicions about the circumstances under which the murder had occurred were correct, this would be the type of person that he was most eager to please. 

Dr. Fletcher was permitted to meet with Dennis only through bulletproof glass, under the watch of armed guards, while he was heavily shackled. She did not need to wonder at the reason for these precautions for he was, as she had read, quite SOMETHING to behold. He was (to use the somewhat crass anatomists term) a ‘bull alpha,’ big and broad and heavy boned. At 15, he could be easily mistaken for a full-grown man by anyone who didn’t look closely enough. When his eyes had lighted on Dr. Fletcher, his face had contorted in a combination of confusion and... perhaps a little fear. 

He’d been exceedingly polite to her throughout the initial interview (all ‘yes, ma’am’ and ‘no ma’am’ where he’d been more ‘who wants to know?’ with her colleague.) She went through three meetings without pressing him for information regarding his crime and in that time came to see just how much of a boy he really was. There was something tender in there, under the stoicism and standoffishness. She tries to coax it out into the open. She starts asking after his health and rather or not he’s eaten that day when she comes to see him then she begins to drip feed in little compliments (she’s heard about how well behaved he’s been since being taken into custody. That’s very smart of him.) 

Predictably, just as the prison had begun to warn her that they wouldn’t allow her to continue visiting indefinitely if she didn’t get some results, he begins to open up. Equally predictably, it is not a flood of information but a trickle. He tells her that he hadn’t been trying to hurt any of the men who’d removed his mother from the house and that he hopes they don’t think that he was. He phrases it just like that ‘mother’ not ‘mother’s body.’ She tells him that only one of them had been wounded and it hadn’t been bad and he seems relieved. 

At their next meeting she decides to try asking him for some of the information that her colleague had been trying to get from him but she knows that she can’t approach too directly or he may shut down again. She asks him if he understands why he’s here. He nods but doesn’t say anything. She asks if he could tell her. He rakes a hand over his shorn scalp. 

“B-because’ a what happened ta’ my mother...?” 

“And what happened?” 

“You don’t know?” 

“I’ve heard what the authorities BELIEVE happened but they weren’t there, were they?” 

“... it was just me‘an her...” 

“Your mother?” 

“...yeah.” 

“When the authorities were called by one of your neighbors, they allegedly found her in bed, did you put her there?” 

For some time he seems to be thinking. This was not what he expected her next question to be. 

“... yes.” 

“And it seemed that she’d been there for at least a few days, according to the coroner. Did you at any point reenter her bedroom during that time?” 

Another long pause. 

“Why would I?” 

“I don’t know, I simply would like to know if you did.” 

There’s a clinking of chains as he rakes his hand over his scalp. 

“...yeah... coupl’a times.” 

“And what did you do when you reentered the room?” 

Long pause. 

“I-I changed the sheets.” 

This correlates with the evidence. Penelope’s clothing had been dirty with her blood and discharge from her body but the sheets under her had been comparatively clean. 

“And why did the sheets need to be changed?” 

“... because she made a mess’a them.” 

“How so?” 

“...T-there was... stains on ‘em...from...from her.” 

“And you found this distressing?” 

“... You’re supposed ta’ change sheets once a week... most people don’t do it enough.” 

This catches her a bit off guard but she tries to gently guide him back in the right direction. 

“But you changed them several times within less than one week.” 

“... Yeah... cause they were dirty.” 

“That was very prudent of you.” 

He flushes just a little; any amount of praise has this effect on him. She moves a little closer to the intended target. 

“There was apparently also evidence that you’d very thoroughly sanitized the kitchen.” 

“...I moped the floor an’ wiped down the counters.” 

“And are those tasks that you’re usually expected to perform?” 

He nods. 

“But this time was different, wasn’t it?” 

Eventually, he nods again. 

“And how was it different?” 

He looks at her as though the answer should be obvious. 

“... cause’a the blood.” 

\------ 

“Oh my god! He looks like he EATS guys like you! Or, like, if you an’ him were both fish, he’d be a shark and you’d be one’a those tiny fish that lives off’a stuff ya’ pick out’a his teeth!” 

“Honey, yer not helping.” 

“... one more. He looks like a slab’a concrete got made into a ‘real boy’ by that fairy in Pinocchio!” 

“The Blue Fairy.” 

Orwell intones flatly without looking up from the paper. 

“What?” 

“In Pinocchio, it was the Blue Fairy.” 

Barry stops the side conversation before it can begin. 

“That’s real interestin’ but it also doesn’t help.” 

“Sorry, sorry.” 

Jade takes a deep breath. 

“So the spit-tube people think he’s yer Dennis?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Did anyone else who did that thing get matched up with people who were, like, the opposite’a them?” 

“I don’t know. They only let ya’ know about other subjects if ya’ get matched with them.” 

“Well then why not just meet’im the one time. Ain’t like he’s gonna rut ya’ right there in the coffee shop.” 

“I guess but... it ain’t gonna’ go well...” 

“Ya’ want me ta’ come with?” 

“I think it’d be better if ya’ were my escape call.” 

“Alright, so I’ll give ya’ a ring fifteen minutes in an’ if ya’ don’t answer I’ll assume he’s either murdered ya’ or is bendin’ ya’ over the espresso bar.” 

Barry laughs. 

“But, seriously, it’s not gonna bother ya’ if I meet with ‘im, is it?” 

“Hon, you know I ain’t scared’ a anyone, let alone a janitor who couldn’t finish high school. Besides, it wouldn’t exactly kill me if ya’ wound up with someone ta’ keep ya’ warm while I’m with Luke and Jalin’s.” 

Since Orwell isn’t usually here when Jade isn’t and Jade spends about half the time at Luke and Jalin’s place, Barry finds himself alone here more than he’d like. It’s not that he’s jealous it’s just that he’s a people person and he doesn’t like sleeping alone. He’s never specifically brought this up to Jade and now he feels a little guilty that she noticed it. He forces a smile. 

“Alright, alright. I’ll set it up as long as you agree ta’ bail me out cause we both know nothings gonna happen.” 

He goes back online and asks Dennis if he can meet him at a diner that’s about 15 minutes from the house (distance enough to obscure its location) at 11 a.m. tomorrow morning. He waits until right before he goes to bed that night to check for the reply which is, as the last one, quite brief. 

“OK.” 

Barry doesn’t know why, but he has trouble sleeping that night. 

\------- 

Dennis doesn’t sleep much the night before he and Barry’s first meeting. He has meds he’s supposed to take for insomnia but he doesn’t like them so he doesn’t bother with them unless he’s on at least his third restless night. They keep him from dreaming and for some reason, he feels like it’s important that he continues to dream. He goes in and asks for a table at the back, he needs a wall on at least one side of him or he feels like people are staring. The waitress is a tiny, fluttery little thing who talks too much. When she finally leaves him alone to go get the coffee he requests, he considers just leaving and waiting in front of the building for the man in the photograph... or just going home and forgetting this whole thing... the man doesn’t know where he lives. 

He told Miss Patricia that he was going to the hardware store when she asked where he was going and he doesn’t know why he lied. He decides that he’ll pick up some furnace filters on the way home... then it will only be a partial lie. The girl brings the coffee and then lingers by the table trying to start a conversation with him. Despite the fact that she seems to have undone some of the buttons on her blouse since last he saw her, he tries not to look down at her body as he gives his clipped answers. When she FINALLY leaves again, he waits until she’s out of sight to take his cloth from his pocket and use it to wipe down the empty cup placed in front of him. He almost returns the cloth to it’s home but then decides he should also wipe down the handle and pour spout of the thermal pitcher that the coffee is in. 

In the asylum, he hadn’t been allowed caffeine or sugar or alcohol or any medications that were not prescribed. He’s allowed caffeine now but has been cautioned against alcohol and they test his blood for illicit substances every two months as well as testing to ensure that he’s taking his antipsychotics. He doesn’t have the same reservations about those that he does about the sleep meds but that mostly because the last time they’d experimentally reduced his dosage he’d started to feel like there were bugs on him, crawling on his scalp... burrowing in in places... He scratches at the memory. 

The asylum had also taught him the importance of regular exercise. It had been explained to him that alphas are like herding dogs, they need more physical activities than omegas or betas. This had confused him a bit... did they think that he’d done what he did to his mother because he didn’t get enough exercise? But he had found that it eased his nerves a surprising amount. He was already up by 4:30 this morning and so he’d gone and run for an hour in the dark. He runs a minimum of an hour a day (sometimes two if he’s feeling jittery) and before bed he lifts weights. 

The night after the doctor had given him his test results had been one of those sleepless nights. He’d laid awake turning the events of the day over in his mind. He tries to remember where the name Barry had been on his body but he can’t. The first name had appeared along his shoulder blade. It should have been easy to hide it but he’d been given no privacy in his mother’s house. 

He can remember the feeling of having it removed, a paradoxically wet burning sensation, and then heat flooding the area. She’d done it with an Exacto knife so the pain of the initial cutting wasn’t too bad but it had ached for weeks and itched even longer as the skin regrew. While the wound had been open, she’d cleaned it nightly with rubbing alcohol and put a big patch bandaid over it. Even though it stung, he’d liked having her tend to him. The only time that she was ever tender with him the way a mother is supposed to be was when she worried she may have gravely injured him but that happened less and less the bigger he got. It was also she who decided if she had overdone it; God help him if he ever cried or complained of being in pain especially after he’d hit puberty and started to look like a man. 

(‘Don’t be a baby, Dennis. This is why your father left, you know. He couldn’t stand what a pussy little faggot his son was turning out to be.’) 

It occurs to him then that that was around the time she’d started paying him other, less motherly attention... when she came into his room in the middle of the night. She’d always presented everything she did as an effort to put him right, to scour out some innate evil within him. He had occasionally wondered when he could bring himself to think of it at all, where he occasional nocturnal doings factored into his correction. The thought is present in his mind before he actively acknowledges it because it is something that he has never come anywhere near considering because of it’s assumed impossibility. It’s not until hours later when he’s been running for a good half an hour that he finally asks himself the question. Is it possible that the alteration in her behavior had been in RESPONSE to then name? Is it possible, he asks himself at last, that she’d carved it out of his flesh because it had been a MAN’S name? 

As he sits in the booth nursing his cup, he continues to ponder the question. If anyone were to ask him if he was attracted to men, his reflexive response would be ‘no.’ All his phantasies are about women... no, girls but all his phantasies are also repulsive... even to him. The inside of his own mind has never been a comfortable place for Dennis, that’s why he prefers to direct his focus outward. 

He swears that he feels a little quickening in the air before Barry even comes through the door. The photograph had not done him justice. In-person, he is far more...ethereal... as if he’s come to this world from a much kinder one where there is no pain or rage or violence. Seeing him, Dennis simultaneously feels a surge of protectiveness and wonders if it would still be possible for him to leave unnoticed. However, when he’s intercepted by a member of the waitstaff, Dennis feels irresistibly compelled to intervene. 

“He’s with me.” 

When the omega’s eyes land on him there’s a momentary flicker of near panic in them. Dennis is used to this, he’s seen it every time he’s approached someone since he hit his growth spurt at 13. During his trial, his public defender had actually cautioned him to only stand up when it was absolutely necessary. Apparently, it wouldn’t help their case to repeatedly remind the jury of how much bigger than his mother he was. As usual, the panic is only present for a fraction of a second before Barry covers it with a smile. The picture hadn’t done that justice either... Dennis wishes that the ground would open up and swallow him.


	4. Slaughter House Floor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry and Dennis go to an art gallery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dr. Fletcher's portion of this chapter takes place in the past, during the preparations for Dennis's trial.

At first, Barry merely resigns himself to be with Dennis. He’s not mean or anything, he’s just... odd and a little hard to talk to. He does respond when it’s warranted but usually as briefly as possible and in a way that implies that he’s merely saying what he thinks is expected. Despite the lack of conversational chemistry, Barry feels... it’s hard to describe. He’s actually kind of scared because there’s something in him telling him that he belongs with this man. It’s similar to how he felt when he first met Jade except that then it felt easy and natural and now it feels like he’s for some reason having to fight the urge to stick his hand into a bug zapper. 

When they part they shake hands. Dennis is hesitant to touch Barry’s hand but then hangs on just a little too long. Barry thinks that that was probably what convinced him to keep trying with Dennis. He seemed lonely. 

The next time they meet it’s somewhere relatively more private. There’s a student gallery on the campus of Barry’s college that’s usually empty around midday. When he arrives, Dennis is already there waiting. He's looking at a painting titled "Slaughter House Floor #16" (which is simply a canvas completely covered with wet looking, fleshy folds) with an expression of mild disgust. Barry can't say he doesn't relate. 

"I know the girl who painted that." 

Dennis's eyes flicker briefly over to Barry but then back to the painting. Barry explains further. 

"The theme of the series is taking textures and forms that can be found on the human body and presenting them out of context, rendering them grotesque." 

"...I thought paintings were supposed to be of things people wanted ta' look at." 

Barry can't help but laugh at that, thinking of the lecture he'd be in for if the artist heard him say that. Dennis looks back over at him, confused but not offended by his laughter. 

"Well you been lookin' at it a while, why do ya' think that is?" 

For a moment Dennis looks embarrassed but then he just shrugs. He's just as chatty as Barry remembers. 

"See, so you could ask yer self why you were lookin' or if you hadn't been able ta' look very long, ya' could ask yer self why THAT was and as a result, ya' might learn somethin' about yer self and, by extrapolation, humanity as a whole." 

Dennis doesn’t say anything but looks off to the side and tenses just a little more as if the prospect of introspection makes him deeply uncomfortable. Barry thinks that that, ironically, is probably something it would do Dennis good to introspect about but doesn't think that this is the time or place for that. Not wanting to scare Dennis away after only their second meeting, he opts instead to lighten the mood. 

"Luckily I design clothes so I don't have ta' put that much thought inta' my stuff." 

This isn't necessarily true but he knows that his making a self-deprecating joke will make Dennis less self-conscious. Dennis shows no sign of even realizing a joke has been made apart from his shoulders relaxing just a little which Barry chooses to take as a win. He gestures for Dennis to follow and walks further into the gallery. 

“So what did ya’ do after ya’ left the diner the other day?” 

Barry’s trying to take it slow because he feels like he may have already overwhelmed Dennis just a little. Dennis tells him he went to the hardware store and that leads into talking about Dennis’s living arrangement. He’d said he was the super of a boarding house the last time he and Barry talked so Barry asks if he lives there. He does, he offers no hints about its location but Barry isn’t bothered by this since he’s offered no hints about the location of where he lives. Barry tells Dennis that he lives with another Omega who’s one of his soul mates in a house that one of her Alphas was left by his father. 

Dennis seems confused by this, which is understandable. In soulmate groupings, there’s usually only one Alpha but multiple Omegas and Betas. Jade is a VERY notable exception because, apart from Barry, all of her soul mates are male Alphas. Most of the stories you hear about that sort of thing are tragic tales about the Alphas being driven to murder by jealousy or at the very least spending their lives in constant competition for the Omega’s affections. 

Jade has a pretty good method for preventing this; she makes sure they all get equal affection and mocks any attempts they make to one-up eachother. Luke and Jain will still play-fight at every opportunity but there’s no real malice in it. Orwell comes from old money and is the only one of them who owns a house so he’s never felt the need to prove himself to anyone. As Barry explains this, he starts to worry that he’s overwhelmed Dennis again. When the Alpha speaks, his tone is a little skeptical. 

“And nobody minds you?” 

“Course not, I wouldn’t be a threat ta’ anybody’s place in the hierarchy even if there were one.” 

Barry smiles to cover the fact that he’s starting to see some potential problems on the horizon. Does it bother Dennis that he lives on the property of another Alpha? At this point, it’s too bad for him if it does but... down the road... All this assumes that Dennis will remain a fixture in Barry’s life and that he’ll have a reason to be jealous of other Alphas being around Barry... that he finds Barry attractive... He realizes that he’s been quiet a little too long, at least in his own opinion. 

“If... ya’ don’t mind my askin’... why exactly did you wanna’ meet me?” 

Dennis looks self-consciously tense again. 

“... I could ask you the same question.” 

“I didn’t mean anything by it... I honestly didn’t expect anything ta’ come of tradin’ my spit fer a tote bag and then when somethin’ did I was curious... Plus, I got three Soul Marks and I’ve only found one so far...” 

Dennis seems to relax, accepting that Barry didn’t intend the question as a barb. 

“I haven’t found... anybody.” 

The way he says that as if he’s not just talking about soul mates makes Barry a little sad. Something primal inside him tells him that it’s his job to make his Alpha feel wanted and that he KNOWS how to do that. Barry mentally tells that thing to get some fucking chill because he still has no idea if Dennis would even want that kind of attention from him. It’s hard to imagine Dennis being touched at all, let alone intimately; he’s just so... buttoned up. Barry takes a deep breath. 

“Well... you found me.” 

Dennis looks at him and there’s something hard to read in his gaze. Barry is usually so good at reading people. Dennis’s voice comes out hoarse and soft and Barry can help but imagine how the other man’s breath would feel on his neck if he were to whisper in his ear. He holds back a shiver. 

“I’m sorry I’m not...” 

He looks genuinely frustrated at his inability to articulate his thoughts and Barry gets that compulsion to touch him again. 

“...I just can’t... promise you... anything...” 

The way he trails off and can’t meet Barry’s eye makes it clear what he means; he means that he can’t promise Barry sex. Barry would be lying if he said that he wasn’t at all disappointed (that thing inside him is even more disappointed) but he also doesn’t want to do anything to hurt Dennis and he has a feeling (possibly because Dennis couldn’t even say the word) that being too demanding in that area might. He tries to lighten things up again. 

“Well I guess that makes us even cause I ain’t promisin’ you anything either.” 

It hurts just little to see how relieved Dennis is. 

“How about we just play it by ear? See where things go.” 

Dennis nods. 

“...ok.” 

\------ 

It was difficult for Dr. Fletcher to get Dennis to even try to save himself. He hadn’t confessed to the murder but he wasn't denying it either. When interrogated, he’d simply recounted events as he recalled them. He was doing the dishes while his mother was on the phone, it was raining outside, he’d broken a plate and she’d begun to shout at him, she’d hit him and the next thing he’d known he was pulling a knife out of her stomach... then he’d had a mess to clean up. Those who wanted his execution used the fact that he’d cleaned up after as evidence that he’d been of sound mind when he’d committed the murder but there were holes in that line of reasoning. He hadn’t tried to dispose of the body at all, he’d simply put it to bed and then cleaned up the mess as he would have any other mess. He hadn’t fled the scene of the crime either. 

Dr. Fletcher listened to the tape of his interrogation, again and again, looking for anything that hinted at what line of questioning she should pursue when she met with him again. Where should she press to gain some insight into his mental state? It was probably around the 7th run through that something stuck out at her. Dennis had a very particular, unadorned way of speaking that led many to believe that he was... dim. He'd been tested for learning disabilities more than once... one teacher for some reason suspected that he may be partially deaf and Dr. Fletcher is still trying to secure an interview with the woman to figure out exactly why. Dr. Fletcher had found it to be quite to the contrary, he was emotionally underdeveloped in some areas but not at all unintelligent, in fact, he demonstrated an impressive vocabulary for his age when given an aptitude test. However, Dennis’s tendency was to avoid drawing attention to himself and using a big word when a small one would do usually drew attention. That was why a word in the interview eventually stood out to Dr. Fletcher. When Dennis said his mother struck him, his exact wording was “she tapped me on the back’ a the head... not so hard, comparatively”... ‘comparatively’? 

What was he comparing it to?


	5. Hormones

Barry and Dennis have been seeing eachother (for lack of a better term) for a couple of months now and Barry still really doesn’t want to rush things but it’s getting harder to resist the temptation. He knows what’s happening, he learned about it in health class in middle school. Now that he’s spent a significant amount of time in contact with his Alpha (enough to convince the primitive part of his brain that Dennis will be sticking around) his brain is releasing a flood of bonding hormones. It’s meant to encourage the speedy establishment of an emotional bond but it’s also making him (again, for lack of a better term) hornier than he’s ever been in his entire life. Seriously, he doesn’t even remember puberty having been this bad. 

When he’s with Dennis, he’s hyperaware of his body; the line of his shoulders, the way the muscles in his chest and arms strain his shirt just a little when he moves, his habit of running his tongue over his upper lip when he’s thinking... Christ. When he’s not around Dennis he misses him even if it’s only been a few hours. He tells himself to stop being so needy but his ‘self’ doesn’t listen. When he’s asleep he has dreams about Dennis ‘claiming’ him and when he’s awake fantasies fill his mind whenever he’s not actively focusing on something else. The fantasies aren’t even about having his own needs met but of being used for his Alpha’s pleasure. 

If Dennis is experiencing anything similar, it doesn’t show and Barry does his best to conceal his personal struggles from his reluctant Alpha. They’ve made some progress socially; Dennis is at least a little more at ease in Barry’s presence (Barry has a feeling that he’s not COMPLETELY at ease around anyone) but there’s either not much to him or there’s a lot that he’s unwilling to share. Dennis has no family, he says that his father left when he was small and his mother died when he was a teenager but he’s vague about the circumstances and about what happened to him after. Barry figures that he probably got moved around to a lot of different foster homes since that would also explain why he’s not still in contact with anyone he met during that period. Barry also suspects that something worse than just getting moved around a lot might have happened to Dennis... there’s an... off-ness about him that implies... Barry’s not sure what it implies but it doesn’t feel like anything good. 

Considering the horror stories he’s heard, Barry will admit that he got lucky when it came to foster homes. He’d been raised mostly by his grandmother because the substance abuse problems that his mother had had on and off all throughout his childhood made her unfit to have custody. She hadn't ever been cruel to him, just... flakey and irresponsible. She’d go off for weeks at a time sometimes and then show back up at his grandmother’s house without warning. Barry was always happy to see her, though, and she was always overjoyed to see him. 

When he was very little, Barry thought that his grandmother was just mean because she and his mom were always getting into arguments but as he got older he started to understand. He still didn’t want them to argue because usually after a big argument his mom would wander off again. He started to view it as his responsibility to keep the peace between them. The more he reduced the friction between them, the more time he bought himself with his mom. She also never once used around him which had caused him to develop the flawed belief that it was his responsibility to keep her from using. 

He tells Dennis all this with the exclusion of the last part. Only one part of it seems to really distress him. 

“She’d just... leave you?” 

“Yeah, I mean, she kinda’ couldn’t be around. I guess I should be grateful that she didn’t want ta’ expose me ta’ any of the really ugly stuff.” 

“That’s no excuse. If she didn’t wanna’ expose you ta’ that, she should have stopped doing it.” 

There’s anger simmering in his tone and Barry is torn between wanting to defend his mother’s actions and feeling touched that his Alpha cares enough to get angry over her not fulfilling her motherly obligations. Ultimately he doesn’t have to act on either impulse because the little flickering of rage quickly subsides. For the first time, Dennis breaks a conversational silence. 

“How’d you wind up in foster care?” 

“Well, when I was thirteen, my mom’s body was found in a motel room... overdose... and when I was sixteen my grandma had a heart attack while I was at school.” 

Dennis looks vaguely pained, as if he wants to say something comforting but can’t think of anything. Barry’s just glad he doesn’t go with the overused “I’m sorry.” 

“It turned out alright though. I got sent to a group home that was more like a halfway house fer teens who were too old ta’ place and I met Jade there.” 

As he says her name, he absently touches it through his shirt. He’s told Dennis bits and pieces about her. He knows that, if Dennis sticks around (please, please, please) they’ll be meeting eachother but he’d not about to rush that. Jade, God bless her, can be a little... harsh and Barry feels as protective of Dennis as he can while fully acknowledging the absurdity of feeling the need to protect someone who looks like they could crush your head with their bare hands. As usual, Dennis seems to become just a little self-conscious at the mention of her and he finally asks a question that Barry could tell was lingering on his lips from the moment he first learned of her existence. 

“Was she, uh, yer first...” 

Dennis seems at a loss for the exact term to use but Barry knows what he means. 

“I’d done stuff before but she was the first person I ever went all the way with.” 

Barry ignores the part of himself that wants Dennis to be jealous (and subsequently assert himself as Alpha via... physical domination) mostly because it would be inconvenient for him to get turned on right now but also because he realizes how petty that is. Still, he figures that if Dennis gets to ask, then so does he. He tries to sound casual. 

“You had any girlfriends?” 

It’s not uncommon for Omegas to ‘save themselves’ for their soul mates but it’s nearly unheard of for Alphas to do so. Usually, they’ll have casual ‘arrangements’ with unattached Omegas or Betas or even other Alphas as long as they’re of their preferred gender. It’s seen as shameful for them to masturbate, which Barry has always found ridiculous. Dennis looks away from Barry and runs his hand over his scalp. Barry tries not to imagine how those hands, big and warm and calloused, would feel on his skin. 

“Uh... n-no...” 

Barry almost asks about boyfriends but then reminds himself who he’s talking to but... no... it’s not possible that Dennis hasn’t done ANYTHING with ANYBODY because... LOOK at him and... when they first met in the dinner, their cute little waitress had practically been climbing into his lap... but he had seemed, if anything, irritated by that... still... Suddenly Barry realizes just how uncomfortable Dennis has gotten. He changes the subject. 

Barry keeps the conversation light for the rest of their ‘date.’ He’s learned that Dennis fares far better socially in places that aren’t crowded so he’s taken it upon himself to find low traffic places that they can meet. This time it’s the aquarium on a Monday afternoon. There’s no one else there but a couple of groups of grade school kids on field trips which they take care to avoid. As they approach the parking lot, something in Barry begins to panic at the knowledge that they will be parting. He really TRIES to ignore it but when they shake hands (which has become custom for them by now) he finds himself clinging and then... Barry kisses Dennis. 

He realizes his mistake the moment that their lips touch and pulls back as if he’d been burned. Dennis just stares at him, expression inscrutable, before hurriedly looking around and scratching the back of his neck. He’s blushing, Barry usually finds it adorable that that happens so easily but not in this instance. He at least doesn’t seem angry or disgusted. 

“Shit... I’m sorry.” 

“N-no...I... I just... have ta’ get home... stuff ta’ do.” 

“...right... I’ll call ya.” 

Dennis only nods as he heads to his car. On the drive home, Barry winds up pulling into the parking lot behind a drug store and crying for a while. He tells himself that it's just hormones. 

\------ 

Dennis gets home and is relieved to find that Miss Patricia has a list of chores for him. He’s not ready to be left alone with his thoughts right now. Not that he ever wants to be alone with his thoughts but he knows that in this case, it’s eventually going to be a necessity. He does his chores and then lifts weights in the basement until the sun goes down. He only runs either before the sun comes up or after it goes down because he doesn’t like people looking at him. 

When he gets back from his run he showers and then gets into bed, finding himself predictably unable to sleep despite his physical fatigue. He guesses that this means that it’s time to be alone with his thoughts... great. Suddenly he’s very aware of his phone charging on the nightstand. When he’d mentioned to Barry that he sometimes has trouble sleeping, Barry had said that he could call him when it happened. He’d said that he silences his phone when he goes to bed but if he’s still up, it will be on. 

Dennis picks up his phone and finds Barry’s number in his contacts... he’ll probably be asleep... The phone rings for a while but just as Dennis starts to think of hanging up, Barry’s voice comes on the line. Even under the circumstances, Dennis finds Barry’s voice soothing. 

“Hello?” 

Dennis realizes that he should have spoken by now. 

“Did I wake you?” 

“Nah, I was just up workin’ on some sketches... couldn’t sleep?” 

“I was just thinkin’ about... earlier...” 

“I’m REALLY sorry about that.” 

“I-I ain’t mad. I was just wonderin’ why you did that.” 

Dennis knows it’s a dumb question but he doesn’t know how else to approach the topic and he’s also still sorting through things in his mind. To Dennis’s surprise, it takes Barry a while to answer. In his experience, Barry never has trouble figuring out what to say... he definitely never asks dumb questions to buy himself time. 

“Dennis... I’m really attracted to you...” 

There’s something almost pained in his voice that does things to Dennis’s stomach. He wishes that they were in the same room so that he could... what? Barry goes on. 

“I guess I knew this was gonna’ happen but I underestimated how... intense it was gonna’ be. I know that’s no excuse though.” 

Dennis hates this. He hates that Barry seems to think that they’re situation is the result of there being something wrong with HIM. When he speaks, his voice comes across as more irritated than he would like. 

“I said I wasn’t mad.” 

There’s a long pause during which Dennis suspects Barry may have hung up on him but then the Omega’s voice comes back softly. 

“So are you just... not attracted ta’ me? Because if that’s how it is then I guess I just gotta’ get used to it but... if it’s somethin’ else...” 

Dennis wishes that he could just say that he isn’t attracted to Barry, Barry may not be happy about it but he’d accept it and at least there’d be some closure. He can’t though because it’s not true, Barry is... all sorts of things that he feels like he shouldn’t be thinking about other men... but he knows where those feelings come from... mother. He wishes he could be honest with Barry about that too but he can’t bring himself to tell his Omega that he spent his childhood being cowed, beaten... other things... For some reason, Barry knowing how weak he really is deep down is a more frightening prospect than Barry finding out that he’s a murderer. 

“I just... really wanna’ make you happy but I don’t know how.” 

Dennis hates knowing that he’s responsible for how sad and desperate Barry sounds. 

“Listen, I like you... and there ain’t a lotta’ people I like.” 

That gets a laugh from Barry and a smile tugs at the corner of Dennis’s mouth. Good, he thinks, it’s almost like we’re normal. He wants to say something that will make Barry feel better and he can only think of one thing. 

“F-from now on you can... kiss me... if you want to.”


	6. US

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry calls Dennis.

Barry takes Dennis up on his offer but since they’re never REALLY alone, it never goes beyond a simple... lingering peck on the lips. To Barry’s delighted surprise, Dennis is sometimes the one who does the lingering. The only thing that tarnishes it is the fact that when other people are around, Dennis pulls away. Barry doesn’t say anything but it stings more than a little. Then one night he finds himself lying awake and decides that he may as well call Dennis. 

They’ve made the agreement that they will both leave their phones on until they go to sleep and either of them can call the other if they need to. Dennis has only taken advantage of the arrangement a few times and this would be the first time Barry has done it. He picks up his phone, partly hoping that Dennis will just be asleep, and finds his alpha’s name in his contacts. It only rings twice before Dennis picks up. 

“Barry?” 

Barry suspects that Dennis actually leaves his phone on even after he goes to bed and he thinks he should scold him for it but hearing his name in that slightly hoarse voice sends a pleasant shiver down his spine. He hadn’t firmly decided if he was going to try to talk to Dennis about not kissing him in front of people tonight and suddenly it doesn’t feel at all important. 

“Hi’ya stud.” 

Barry had cycled through multiple pet names for Dennis but ‘stud’ was the first one that really fit... and he likes the way Dennis blushes when he says it. Dennis has the expected reaction to the unexpected phone call. 

“...you alright?” 

“Yeah, just couldn’t sleep an’ thought I’d see if you were up.” 

“Somethin’ botherin’ you?” 

Dennis may be a bit emotionally stunted but he tries to be there for Barry and Barry appreciates that. 

“I’ve just been thinkin’ about... “ 

He has to stop himself because he was about to say ‘I’ve just been thinking about US’ and he doesn’t want to be a cliche. Suddenly, an impulse seizes him and pulls him down a different path. 

“I just don’t like bein’ here alone.” 

“You’re alone?” 

“Yeah, Jade and Orwell are both away on sleepovers so it’s just me here an’ I get a little nervy when I’m by myself.” 

He feels like he’s being manipulative but he hasn’t said anything that isn’t true. He tries to say the next part as if he just thought of it. 

“Would you... maybe... wanna’ come over?” 

“Over... ta’ your place?” 

“You don’t have to... it was just a thought.” 

“I can if you want me to... where is it?” 

He gives Dennis the address, they apparently don’t even live very far apart, and about fifteen minutes later there’s a knock on the door. Barry tries not to seem nervous when he answers it. It’s starting to get chilly at night so Dennis is wearing a blue jacket over his usual dark blue slacks and button-down. He wears the same clothes every day regardless of rather or not he’s working. By now Barry has realized that most of Dennis’s odd habits are efforts on his part to soothe the constant, underlying anxiety he feels and while some may see a thing like that as a red flag, it just makes Barry want to get closer to him... to soothe him... first in the obvious ways and then in other less obvious ways. Jade often accuses Barry of being too nice but he doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting to make other people feel good. 

“You live here?” 

“Yeah... Orwell’s dad left it ta’ him.” 

It occurs to him just now that inviting his alpha to another alpha’s house when that alpha isn’t home could be interpreted as... he’s not sure what exactly. Dennis clearly isn’t sure either and seems to be trying to figure out what. It also occurs to Barry for the first time that Dennis lives in a single room in the boarding house that he maintains and that that is radically different from his own living situation. To prevent that from marinating for too long, Barry leads him into the living room. Once they’re in the room, Barry has trouble letting go of Dennis’s hands... God, he loves those hands. He looks up to see that Dennis’s brow is creased in concern. 

“You okay?” 

Of course, Dennis is worried because his omega just called him in the middle of the night for the very first time and asked him to come over. He laughs nervously. 

“Yeah, I was just up and thinkin’ about...” 

It’s actually hard for Barry to remember what he’d been thinking about. Dennis smells SO good. He smells better and better to Barry each time they see eachother... shut up hormones. 

“... I was just thinkin’ about...” Suddenly, Barry feels stupid and, well, hormonal for calling Dennis in the middle of the night over something like a lack of PDA. “...I couldn’t sleep... you want a drink?” 

Dennis hesitantly nods. When asked what he wants Dennis just says ‘whatever you’re having’ which makes Barry suspect that Dennis may not be much of a drinker. His suspicion is confirmed when Dennis winces after little after a sip of red wine. Throughout the conversation, he only drinks when Barry does and even then, only small sips. They fall into conversation and eventually, the wine loosens Barry’s tongue enough that he brings up the topic he’d originally intended to... in a roundabout way. 

“So... would it be outta’ line fer me to assume that neither’a yer parents would have been thrilled if ya’ brought me home?” 

\------ 

Dennis is at first taken aback by the question but he supposes that the topic would need to be discussed eventually and that now’s as good a time as any. 

“I couldn’t say about my father but... my mother didn’t seem ta’ approve of anything I did.” As he says this, Dennis realizes that it’s a glaring understatement but it’s all he can get out now. His hesitation is partly due to the usual reasons but also because he doesn’t want to spoil the moment. The alcohol tastes terrible but it’s warming him pleasantly and Barry looks so soft and languid in the few lamps that are on in the sitting room. Being in this place also reminds him that Barry does not need him and that makes him less keen to remind his omega of how much less complicated his life would be had they never found eachother. 

“So me an’ her wouldn’t have gotten along?” 

Dennis thinks that Barry means this in a light-hearted way and so he tries to smile. 

“It shouldn’t matter now, though... I KNOW that... I swear I’m tryin’.” 

“I know you are.” Barry smiles but it’s not right... it’s... sad somehow. Before he can contemplate this further, Barry leans in and kisses him. It’s probably meant to be just a pack on the lips but his lips are so warm and soft and the wine doesn’t taste as bad there as it does in Dennis’s own mouth. Barry is eager (always, Dennis can smell it, can feel it radiating off of him) and so Dennis’s efforts are returned many times over. 

It’s too much, Dennis moans and loses track of the glass he’d been holding. He starts when he hears the glass shatter but Barry doesn’t seem to notice and so he has to break the kiss. 

“I’m sorry.” Panic flares in his mind but Barry just laughs. 

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” He smiles, Dennis’s hands itch to touch him but the alpha doesn’t move. “Just give me a minute.” 

When Barry stands, Dennis immediately misses the heat of his body. While he’s in the kitchen, Dennis reflexively begins picking up the glass. Barry returns and swats him playfully. 

“Sit down.” 

Barry...kneels in front of him to pick up the remaining glass and pile it on the coffee table. As he wipes up the liquid, Dennis thinks that he should clean the area with a wet rag first or it’s going to dry sticky but Dennis isn’t going to say that out loud. He doesn’t get all the way through cleaning it up anyway, he looks up at Dennis and their eyes lock and he freezes. Forgetting his task, he rises up further on his knees and they kiss again. Barry edges closer until he’s between Dennis’s legs, pressed against his clothed erection. In this position, Dennis feels vulnerable and exposed, and for some reason that only fuels his arousal. (He also can’t help but think that Barry is now kneeling in the spill and that his pants are going to be stained.) He does things with his tongue in Dennis’s mouth that makes it impossible not to wonder how that tongue would feel... elsewhere and then just barely pulls away. 

“How’d ya’ like ta’ see my room?”


	7. Physiological Indicators

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry and Dennis have their kind-of-first-time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is short and probably should have just been a part of the previous chapter but oh well.

Dennis initially seems a little put off at the state of Barry’s room (it’s Barry’s personal belief that as long as HE knows where everything is, then it’s organized enough) but quickly remembers why they came in here. He’s on Barry with an unfamiliar but wholly welcome degree of intensity. One of those powerful arms snakes around Barry’s waist and one of those lovely hands tangles in his hair. Another thing that makes Barry think that Dennis isn’t particularly romantically experienced is the way he kisses. It’s not bad just... amateurish but what he lacks in finesse he makes up for in eagerness. 

Anyway, Barry couldn’t find fault with Dennis right now even if he tried. He’s been waiting MONTHS for this. Dennis’s body feels even better than he’d imagined, so warm and firm. With so much pleasing topography available to him, he can’t decide what to touch first and winds up doing some juvenile fumbling of his own. When Dennis turns his attentions to his neck, Barry makes a little puppy-like whimpering sound that’d be embarrassing if there were anyone else around. He’s not even sure how they wind up on the bed but it feels magnificent to have Dennis pinning him down, pawing at him like a lion, sinking teeth into the juncture of his neck and shoulder. 

They kiss and grind against eachother through their clothes until it starts to become uncomfortable and then it occurs to Barry that Dennis (who’s never been with a man or possibly anyone) might be a little overwhelmed by the task of figuring out where to go from here. Barry reluctantly pushes him off, making sure to kiss him after he withdraws to make it clear that he’s not being rejected. With some distance between them, Barry can see how flusters Dennis is. The Alpha is shaking, he closes his eyes and breathes slow and deep through his nose as if trying to calm himself. 

“I did somethin’ wrong, didn’t I?” 

It’s a question but comes across as more of a statement as if this were some sort of test that Dennis had been worried that he would fail and now he has. Barry resists the compulsion to hug him. 

“Oh, honey, no. I just think we need ta’ sort some things out first... are you ok?” 

Dennis finally looks at him again and it’s clear that he can’t answer that question. He seems lost and, Barry could swear, a little afraid. Barry takes a deep breath and does his level best to ignore the burning in his body. 

“Listen, we don’t have’ ta... do anything if you don’t want to. You know that right?” 

Going purely by... physiological indicators, it would seem that Dennis definitely does want to do SOMETHING but Barry knows better than to equate being visibly aroused with being willing. Considering what little he knows about Dennis’ background, he doubts anyone had ever told him that there isn’t necessarily a correlation between those things and the fact that the other man seems puzzled by the question confirms that. Suddenly Barry feels bad for initiating this. He reaches over and takes one of Dennis’s hands then slowly moves closer. Surprisingly, Dennis wraps his arms around his waist, buries his face in his neck, and then spends a while just clinging to him. 

The Alpha is shaking even more now and his skin is burning and every muscle in his body is tense. Barry reaches up to pet the back of Dennis’ neck and gets an ache in his chest when the other man tenses up just a little more at first and makes a noise in his throat that sounds like a barely-suppressed sob. 

“It’s ok, you’re ok.” 

Eventually Dennis pulls away, a little calmer but still clearly, PAINFULLY hard. Barry peppers kisses on his lips and down his neck. 

“How about I just take care’ a you?” 

Dennis takes a moment to catch his meaning and even longer to nod his consent. Barry is relieved, he doesn’t consider himself a particularly proud person but begging to suck dick definitely isn’t a good look and it would have taken all his will power not to beg if he’d been refused. He slides down Dennis’s body until he’s kneeling between his legs again and then undoes his fly. Dennis is exactly what you would expect in that area and a fresh jolt of arousal runs through Barry’s body as he imagines how good that would feel stretching and filling him. It takes Dennis seconds to cum after Barry takes him into his mouth and Barry eagerly swallows it and continues sucking through Dennis’s orgasm. 

When he stands and goes to walk away Dennis grabs him with a heartbreaking urgency, kisses him, and pulls him back down into the bed. Barry lets him and then slowly slides out of his grip. 

“I’ll be back in a minute, ok?” 

Dennis reluctantly nods again. Barry grabs a pair of his pajamas and goes into the bathroom. While pleasuring Dennis, he came in his pants... something that hasn’t happened to him since he was 14. He quickly washes up and changes. Returning to the bedroom, he finds Dennis waiting for him, his clothes put back in their proper place. He’s considerably more relaxed but still self-conscious. 

“You want me ta’ go?” 

Barry just kisses him and leads him gently back to the bed. To his delighted surprise, Dennis spends the night spooned up behind him, his arms wrapped possessively around his waist.


	8. The First Beta Pope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first part of this chapter probably should have just been the end of the previous chapter. The rest is world-building.

Dr. Fletcher has told Dennis that if he ever begins to see or hear things that don’t seem possible, he should tell her immediately because they may mean that his antipsychotic isn’t working. It’s never happened before but he begins to worry that it may be happening when he walks out of Barry’s bedroom and finds his lawyer in the kitchen. Dennis is never one for sleeping in but he’s especially unlikely to do so when he’s in an unfamiliar place and wearing the same clothes from the day before. When he woke up, he was torn between his intense compulsion to go home and shower and his intense desire to just lay there holding Barry until the end of time. Ultimately, the compulsion wins out and that’s when he goes out into the kitchen and finds the defense attorney who saved him from the death penalty making coffee. 

This is impossible for a number of reasons, chief among them being that the man is dead. He remembers hearing about it while he was in the asylum, he’d been stabbed to death late at night in the parking lot outside the courthouse. Adding to the impossibility of the situation is the slightly less pressing fact that he appears to be the same age that he’d been when he had worked on Dennis’s case but... that had been fifteen years ago and... he’s DEAD. Dennis is on the brink of panic when the man finally looks up and notices him standing there. He starts initially (that’s most people’s reaction to unexpectedly seeing Dennis) but recovers instantly. 

“Oh, you’re Dennis, right?” 

Why is he asking? He should know who he is... but he should also be rotting in the ground. 

“I’m Orwell.” 

The dead man extends a hand to him and then the fog around his brain abruptly clears. Orwell... ‘Orwell’s dad left it ta’ him.’ 

“R-right.” Dennis sputters and takes the offered hand, releasing it almost as soon as he touches it. The man looks vaguely concerned and Dennis scrambles to explain his presence. 

“I-uh-he invited me over... last night.” 

The dead man- ORWELL nods. Dennis forces himself to really look and now it’s clear that this isn’t his lawyer, just a man who looks a lot like him... he’s actually probably younger than Dennis’ lawyer had been. Still, the resemblance is undeniable. 

“Would you like some coffee?” The man’s very eerily familiar voice jerks Dennis back out of his thoughts. 

“N-no, thank you... I have ta’ go ta’ work... could you tell Barry that?” 

“Alright.” Dennis can tell by the man’s expression that he’s acting odd but there isn’t anything that he can do about it... there never is. He leaves through the back door because it’s closer than the front door but then realizes that there’s no way out of the back yard and has to walk back through the house to the front door and now he’s not sure that he’ll ever be able to go back there again (he will.) 

\------ 

The exact role that Betas are meant to play in the grand scheme of things has been long pondered by all who study humanity as a whole. In the western world, the population control theory is commonly regarded as the one most well-grounded in science. It is not uncommon, especially in animals that live in groups, for a certain percentage of the population to either not be allowed to breed, opt not to breed, or be physically incapable of breeding. This serves the practical function of keeping the species in check to ensure that the resources upon which it relies are not overtaxed. Betas tend to be asexual (though not necessarily aromantic) and have androgynous physical builds and ambiguous genitalia. About one in every million Betas is capable of either insemination or conception and about one in every billion can do both (meaning that they possess two complete functioning sets of opposing sexual organs.) 

In a close second to the population control theory is the genetic refuse theory. This states that Betas are a genetic "accident;" having failed to become either male or female/alpha or omega while in the womb, they get caught somewhere between. What causes these "accidents" to occur has always been largely subject to speculation and has not gotten less so as science has advanced. Usually, though, it's seen as coming down to the mother. What did she eat during the pregnancy? Did she work too much or rest too much? Is there inbreeding in her family history? Etc. The popularity of this theory until relatively recently lead to the development of all sorts of dubious medical treatments for the "condition" the history of which is as fascinating as it is depressing with the more extreme "medical professionals" simply advising that any fetus that's gender is not apparent by the third trimester be aborted. 

The Roman Catholic church has always believed that Alphas and Omegas serve God by providing him with more followers but that a Betas place is to serve God in a more direct capacity as members of the clergy. The Catholic church used to accept Beta children that were surrendered to them as infants but in recent decades the law has been altered to forbid them from accepting any under 12. This is in some ways a negative thing as the church was once a haven for Beta babies who would otherwise be abandoned by their parents but in other ways a good thing. 12 years is ample time to change one’s mind about relinquishing one’s child. There have also been instances of some religious orders essentially using the Betas they were sheltering for slave labor. The sociological implications of this are a bit hard to read as the higher-ranking members of the orders caught doing this were also Betas. 

When it was first founded, the Mormon church held that Betas had no souls and thus could not enter the afterlife. This conclusion was likely drawn because Betas are typically born without soul marks (though this does not prevent them from developing relationships or even becoming embedded within soulmate groupings or “packs.”) In recent years, the Mormon church has changed it’s policy to the belief that, much as Omegas can only enter the afterlife if bonded with an Alpha, Betas can only enter the afterlife if they ‘swear themselves’ to an Alpha. Within the church, this is seen as a lesser form of marriage. Betas who join a household in this fashion are seen as being at the bottom of that household’s hierarchy (Alphas serve God, Omegas serve Alphas, Betas serve everyone.) This often results in the Beta acting as a domestic servant within the household. 

Up until 1973, Betas were not permitted by law to own property. Omegas could own property only until they were bonded to an Alpha, after which ownership would be transferred to their alpha. The two groups (Betas and Omegas) together managed to enact both social and governmental changes that have granted them significantly more autonomy. In the case of Omegas, it has been found that many still voluntarily choose to relinquish their legal autonomy after becoming bonded but rather this is a function of biology or social indoctrination is widely debated. 

Despite the two having historically been allies in the fight for equality, a certain amount of tension exists between Betas and Omegas. Historically, as Alphas have typically possessed the most authority, the only way for the two other groups to gain power has been to win the favor of Alphas. One may assume that the Omega would be a shoo-in in this area but historically Alphas have displayed a tendency to infantilize Omegas. Omegas are loved and cherished but they are typically not where Alphas go for advice. Betas, on the other hand, are viewed as being more level headed than Omegas and are thus more commonly found in advisory roles. 

Recently, the focus of this conflict has become Saint Agata, the patron saint of Betas and the first Beta Pope (there have been four since.) It all started about a year ago when previously unknown etchings of the Saint were discovered that depicted him (Betas are expected to choose a pronoun when they reach puberty) with a distended stomach. These were interpreted by some to be depictions of the Sain while pregnant. If this is the case, there are two possibilities; 1) ‘he’ was among the extremely small percentage of Betas capable conceiving a child or 2) ‘he’ was actually a female Omega. Catholic Omegas that were looking for a way into the clergy seized upon this possibility. Catholic Betas, for obvious reasons, objected to their patron saint being retconned into a flat-chested omega who was not only unchaste but could possibly have been pregnant at some point. 

It’s difficult to say how strong of a correlation there was but in the midst of all this, the Catholic church was struck by another controversy. It started with a young beta who claimed to have escaped (it was later revealed that she was permitted to leave) from a convent going to an omega journalist and recounting stories of the “ritualized abuse” (the journalist’s words) that she’d been subjected to there. This eventually lead to a police investigation which revealed the stories to be at least partially true. The Catholic Church claimed to have known nothing of the convent’s “unorthodox practices” but representatives from within the convent in question claimed that what the “poor girl” had “misinterpreted” as abuse was, in fact, a form of highly disciplined “prayerful meditation” that had been practiced by their order since it’s founding and was, indeed, sanctioned by the church (the church continued to deny this.) The practice involved “preparations of the mind and body” through ritual fasting and the CONTROLLED infliction of pain, gradually increasing in severity over time as tolerance increases. 

They emphasized that the “girl” had come to the convent of her own volition specifically seeking to learn this practice and restated FREQUENTLY that the “girl” had not been held against her will. It is worth noting that the “girl” eventually tried to withdraw her statements, claiming that she had been in an unstable mental state at the time she’d made them (likely as a result of having not eaten for the entire week proceeding her seeking out the journalist.) Ultimately no criminal charges were filed but, to save face, the church “dissolved” the convent. The novices that had resided there were sent to other convents but the nuns (the ones that had supposedly met out the “abuse”) were all excommunicated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Orwell looks like Dennis' lawyer because his father was Dennis' lawyer.


	9. V-I-O-L-E-T

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey, want a super dark, AU origin story for Patricia? Well, you're getting one anyway.  
> OR  
> Teenage Patricia gets involuntarily drafted into a murder cult.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING! KIDNAPPING AND VIOLENT RAPE OF A MINOR!

Patricia had only been fourteen when her soul mate had found her. This had been wholly unexpected as she had not been aware that she had one. She was among the last of the babies that the church was permitted to take in and, on the extremely rare occasion that a novice developed a soul mark, it was common practice to remove it with repeat applications of a very weak acid. She remembered having had something applied to her back by one the older sisters but she hadn’t been told what it was for and they weren’t allowwd mirrors (‘tools of vanity’) in the convent. Had she been told, she may have at least been able to brace herself for the events in question. 

By the time she was taken, three other Betas had already been abducted in London two of which were nuns. The police were not particularly concerned as they had no reason to believe that the three disappearances were connected or even that they were the result of foul play. The convent, however, was on high alert because they found it a bit difficult to believe that two Nuns both of whom had been in the church literally their entire lives would just suddenly chose to leave one day without even informing anyone. Patricia could recall having seen the Mother Superior explaining this to a police officer and how it was the most visibly agitated that she’d seen the woman. This was particularly note worthy as nuns of their order were taught never to openly display emotion. 

For some reason, at the time, Patricia had assumed that if there was a problem, it couldn’t possibly wind up affecting her. Maybe she thought that she was too young, the others who’d gone missing were in their thirties and she was barely more than a child. Or, perhaps, she’d simply assumed her invulnerability the way that most children do. Either way, she’d ventured out on her own to go to the library. She had PLANNED on returning before dark and she would have had she not been apprehended along the way. 

Unexpectedly, the apprehending had been done by a group of female Omegas. The three of them had had little difficulty wrestling her into the back of a van. She had had just long enough to register a faint traces of a scent in the back of the van... something that made her pulse quicken before she had been rendered unconscious. She’d awoken sometime later in a small, windowless bedroom with her wrists and ankles bound together with duct tape and something shoved into her mouth. She had been able to hear feminine voices, mid-conversation, through the door. 

“It’s a kid... you didn’t tell me it was a kid.” 

On an unrelated note, Patricia has always thought that it was terribly rude when people use the word “it,” as opposed to literally any other pronoun, to refer to a Beta. Even if you guess the wrong one, you’re still at least not referring to a person as if they were an inanimate object. 

“We don’t have time to find another one! You wanna risk pissing him off?” 

There is some arguing that she has difficulty making out in their hushed tones. Eventually and Omega who hadn’t been with the other three when they had snatched her comes into the room. She’d older than the other three but dressed similarly, like the ‘flower children’ that Patricia often sees begging for change on corners. She examines Patricia for a long time but eventually seems to come to a decision. She didn’t speak, she simply walked out of Patricia’s line of sight and, from the sound of it, began to rifle around in the drawers of a dresser. 

Patricia tried to discreetly apply pressure to the duct tape around her wrists, she had gotten it to stretch enough that she may have been able to slip a hand out if she’d had the chance. Se felt the woman’s hand on the side of her head, combing through her hair, and then heard her voice. 

“Ok, sweetie, you’re gonna’ want to hold still. This’ll sting a little but believe me if I didn’t do it you’d wind up wishing that I did.” 

Before Patricia could even guess what she was referring to, she’d felt a needle sink into the side of her neck. She would later be told that the drug with which she’d been injected was most likely ketamine. The woman climbed into the bed behind her and just lied there with her for a period of time that felt both long and short to her. Eventually, she began to feel... odd, as if she were floating just above her own body. The woman began to touch her, raking fingers lightly up and down her arms, sending little ripples of sensation all through her body, and then brought her mouth close to Patricia’s ear and began cooing endearments. Patricia felt the words as if they were feathers brushing all over her body. 

She doesn’t remember being unbound or stood up, she just remembers suddenly being up and surrounded by the Omegas. They started to undress her and it occurred to her to resist but the thought felt very far away and their hands seemed inescapable and they kept gushing about how lovely she was. Some of them pressed kisses to her newly bared flesh but when she tried to move away it felt as if she was deep underwater with pressure pushing on her from all sides. They begin to rub oils into her body and she recognizes the scent... it’s frankincense. By and by, they begin to dress her. 

Eventually she looks up and wonders why they’ve put a lifesized portrait of Saint Agata in the room but then she realizes that that’s her. They’ve put her in a costume similar to what the first Beta pope is usually shown wearing when he’s depicted in art except... the vestments are sheer so that her body can be plainly seen through them. This causes a little bit of panic to rise in her mind, like a nearly drowned swimmer kicking to the surface. The older Omega who’d injected her with the needle seems to notice this and comes forward with a glass of something. She takes a sip out of the glass, places a hand on either side of Patricia’s face to keep her from withdrawing, and puts her mouth over hers. 

The liquid floods into her mouth and Patricia recognizes the taste of red wine (“...this is my blood...”) but there’s something bitter mixed into it. As they lead her from the room, she feels as if she is both asleep and conscious at the same time. Dreaming but awake. The sense of unreality escalates when she’s lead into a chapel. The only light inside or the candles by the altar and in that light she sees HIM for the first time. 

She hadn’t been able to smell him over the frankincense and the melting wax but she somehow knows that that had been his scent in the van. He’s tall and broad (much later Dennis would initially remind her of him because the two have the same general body type), he’s also dressed in a plain black cassock. When she reacher him, she realizes that the Omega’s hadn’t lead her here, they’d simply pointed her in his direction and she’d walked here by herself. If she’d had any sense left she’d have tried to run but between the drugs and the mesmerizing effect he seems to have on her (in the dark, his eyes are like black pools in his face) she can only stand frozen. He cups the side of her face and smiles and to this day she would swear that his teeth had been like those of a shark even though they didn’t seem to be at any point after. 

He draws her to him and the little that remains of her survival instincts kick in. She puts her hands on his chest and pushes with all her might but it has no effect other than making him laugh. He kisses her and when she doesn’t open her mouth he reaches up and pries it open with no effort at all. When his tongue enters her mouth, her whole body seems to quicken. It’s terrifying, as though all the blood in her body is rushing to the surface of her skin. 

When their lips part she realizes that at some point during the kiss he’d picked her up and set her on the altar. She also realizes that the altar is sticky with blood. She tries to scream but he quiets her by kissing her again and begins to tear at her clothing. The next thing she knows she’s being held down by the Omegas. They keep holding her down and pressing kisses to her skin and cooing endearments as he... he... When he enters her it doesn’t hurt (probably because of the ketamine) but she feels her insides stretching and tearing and somehow that sensation is even worse without pain to cover it. 

She screams and screams but they take no notice. He ruts into her, licking and kissing and murmuring Latin incantations into her skin. At some point, the kisses turn into bites, gentle at first but then harder and harder until they draw blood which he laps at it seeps out. At the same time, the Omegas begin to nip at her limbs. These sensations are sharp enough that they pierce the fog of the ketamine and she hears cruel, musical laughter every time she flinches. 

She’s not sure if she blacked out or if her mind simply gave way but the next thing she knew she was waking up back in the bedroom. Her wrists are bound again but this time they didn’t see a need to gag her. She’s naked and her body is a mass dull aches the worst of which is between her legs. She can hear them talking outside the door again but this time they’re speculating over why HE had not killed her last night. She bites her lip to keep from screaming (what good would it do?) and begins to cry. 

Because she’s crying, she doesn’t notice when the voices outside the door fall silent or when the door is very slowly opened. He sits on the bed and pulls her into his lap and she tries to struggle but he’s SO much stronger than her. In a blind panic, she bites him but he simply lets her and she finds that she doesn’t have it in her to break the surface of his skin. Once it’s clear she’d been making a hollow threat he laughs. She whimpers around the fingers in her mouth as he kisses her forehead and then trails down to her neck. He stalls there for a moment and shivers and she realizes that it’s in response to her scent. His mouth is right against her ear when he whispers; 

“Tell me you’re name, little one.” 

He slips his fingers out of her mouth and strokes her bottom lip with his thumb. Fearing how he may react, she tells him that her name is Violet because at the time that HAD been her name... before she’d hade to change it... His smile lights up his face in a terrifying way. He gently sets her back down on the bed, walks to the middle of the room, and takes off his shirt to show her V-I-O-L-E-T, right over his heart.


	10. The East End Beast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More of Patricia's back story is filled in by a somewhat vapid conversation.

Jade doesn’t get back until the late afternoon and, as usual when she’s spent a few days with one of her other Alphas, spends that night with Orwell. Barry has school the next day so he doesn’t see her until that evening when they cuddle up on the couch to watch the array of entertainment news shows that Jade DVRs religiously. Barry’s pretty sure that the main reason Orwell’s glad to let him live here is that it gives Jade someone to do stuff like this with. He is in the living room with them but he’s reading a book from which he only occasionally looks up to make a comment. Eventually, something on the screen does hold his attention. 

It’s the most recently released poster for the upcoming movie Saint Violet. It features Kristen Stewart with long platinum blonde hair that’s probably a wig since her real hair hasn’t been below her shoulders since the early 2000s. She’s standing against a background are bare trees that are all in shades of blue and grey. She’s also wearing a pale blue dress like the robes saints and stuff are usually shown wearing except that it’s see-through (the x-rated bits have subtly airbrushed over.) The cool color palette of the rest of the image makes the bloody bite marks on her forearms pop. 

K-Stew is still something of a controversial figure since she made her break into mainstream films playing the Omega main character in the Twilight films. This pissed off the Betas because it furthered the “toxic societal norm” of Betas being expected to try and ‘pass’ as either Alphas or Omegas in order to be accepted. It pissed off at least some of the Omega fans of the books the films were based on because they thought that the character should be played by an Omega and seemed to have forgotten that the majority of Betas in movies are played by skinny omegas with short hair. Neither of these things (or the mountains of negative critical reviews) stopped the movies from succeeding commercially. 

Barry doesn’t have strong feelings either way about the actress but it sometimes seems to him like her whole career after that has been self-conscious posturing to prove to the other Betas that she’s not ashamed to be one of them. Casting her also always feels like a bit of a cop-out to Barry. When they need a Beta actress (she does go by ‘she’ even in her private life) that they know has at least SOME mass appeal, they bring in K-Stew. This has lead to her playing a lot of characters that she doesn’t really match up with. For example, the character she’s playing in the movie the poster is for was supposed to have been, like, twelve during the events of the ‘true story’ it’s based on and K-Stew pushing thirty. She could still pass for an older teenager but no one’s buying her as a tween. 

Barry doubts that any of this has anything to do with why Orwell’s looking at the poster though, it’s probably just because it’s a well-composed image. Jade notices Orwell actually paying attention to something on the screen and pauses to explain it to him. 

“That’s fer a movie comin’ out that we are GONNA’ see.” 

Orwell looks mildly curious which is all she needs to keep going. 

“It’s like a... remake (?) of this TV mini-series from... I think it was the early 90s that’s fuckin’ insane.” 

She starts laughing so Barry goes on for her. 

“It was supposed ta’ be based on the true story of a serial killer in the 70s-” 

“The Beast.” Jade reminds him. 

“Yeah, it started as, like, the East End Beast ‘er somethin’ but got shortened ta The Beast-” 

“They called’im that cause he chewed’em up.” 

“Right, he didn’t use knives ‘er anything, he just sort’a beat his victims ta’ death and bite pieces off ‘a them and they were all Betas cause he had... brain cancer?” 

Barry looks at Jade for confirmation. 

“Yeah, he had a tumor ‘er some shit and he said that that one... saint... the one that looks like Bowie...” 

“Agata.” Orwell supplies. 

“Right, Saint Bowie, Lord of fuckable Betas (this gets a laugh from Orwell, he like Jade’s sense of humor) came ta’ him in a dream ‘er somethin’ and they did it-” 

“I thought he drank some’a the saints blood ‘er somthin'.” 

“One'a those, eatin' and fuckin' always seem ta' blend together with these serial killer nut jobs... anyway he had a dream that made him think that fuckin’ Betas would fix ‘is brain so he raped a few and when that didn’t work her started killin’ em and eatin’ parts’a them after-” 

“No,” Barry interrupts “He bit off parts while they were alive, like, durin’ the... other parts.” 

“Right! That’s what made it so fucked up! But he had four Omegas he was bonded with who’d help ‘im cause I guess they believed him about the whole rapey cancer cure thing and then eventually started just doin’ nuns cause I guess he figured they were the most Beta Betas-” 

“Uh,” Barry interrupts again. “Joan Jett was the most Beta Beta.” 

Barry genuinely admires Joan Jett, for her musical talent, the bravery it must have required for her to present as both openly Beta and explicitly sexual (those two things are assumed to NEVER exist in the same person by main-stream sensibilities) and her pioneering of the punk, soft-butch aesthetic. 

“Yeah,” Jade concedes, “but this guy went ta’ Catholic school when he was a kid so he kidnapped this one Beta who was, like... a baby nun?” 

“Novice.” Orwell supplies again. 

“Yeah, one’a those an’ he decided ta’ keep ‘er around an’ make her part’a his little rapey murder brain cancer cult fer some reason an’ the series was all about how she was some kind’a slutty evil genius who talked the rest’a them in’ta killin’ people an’ then just made it LOOK like he was the ring leader then got ta' walk because she gave them dirt on all the others.” 

“But that part definitely wasn’t true... the slutty evil genius part anyway.” Barry HAS to interrupt. “That’s why a lotta people got pissed off about the series... they also mixed up ‘novices’ and ‘catholic school girls’ and mixed up actual catholic school girls with the fake ones ya’ see in porn... and she was played by an Omega... and they didn’t do anything ta’ conceal that fact. That’s why they’re makin’ a big deal about havin’ a Beta play her in this and it’s supposed ta’ be a more ‘accurate, respectful’ retelling but I got doubts about that.” 

“I don’t know, they got Meryle Streep ta’ be the head nun an’ she usually classes shit up.” 

“Yeah, but Violet was a kid... the Omega who played her in the series was 17 but that’s at least close.” 

“K-Stew said in that interview that she listened ta’ those recordings, thought, so she's takin' this seriously.” 

“I don’t think those are real.” 

“Recordings?” Orwell looks confused, Barry explains. 

“There were these tape recording someone posted to youtube that were supposed ta’ be her testifying in court but it doesn’t sound real... the girl in them sounds like she’s readin’ from a script... like, there’s no emotion in ‘er voice.” 

“A flat affect can be a side effect of trauma.” 

“That’s what I said!” Jade kisses him on the cheek like she usually does when he proves her right. 

“Not exactly that.” Barry smirks. 

“Whatever.” Jade rolls her eyes. 

Orwell goes back to his book, signifying that he’s no longer interested in the conversation and Jade hits play. Eventually, she loses interest and starts another conversation. 

“So, yer Dennis was here the other night?” 

Barry looks confused. 

“Orwell caught ‘im in the kitchen... so how small was it?” 

“..it wasn’t... why are you askin’?” 

“I was just assumin’ that was the reason he was so skittish about puttin’ out. Couldn’t ‘a been cause he didn’t want to.” 

She slides closer to Barry and puts a hand on his leg. 

“He’s just... shy. I need you ta’ promise that when you meet him you’ll be nice.” 

“When am I ever NOT nice?” Jade acts mock-offended but then laughs. “Yeah, I’ll go easy...ish.” 

They go quiet and return their attention to TMZ for a while. Jade lays across Barry’s lap. He misses her, he always misses her when she goes away. Eventually, she rolls onto her back to look up at him. 

“So... how big was it?” 

Barry doesn’t answer that but he does smile. The rest of the evening passes peacefully. About an hour later, Orwell kisses Jade goodnight and goes to bed. When they’ve finished their backlog of trash tv, they go to Barry’s room and have sex. It’s easy and natural like it always is for them. As he falls asleep, Barry realizes that he’s on the side of the bed that Dennis had been on. He can smell his Alpha on the pillow and feel that phantom of his body heat in the mattress.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I spent most of my day at work today thinking about which real-world celebrities would be Beta icons in this universe.... yeah.  
> p.s. Kirstin Stewart was really good as Joan Jett in The Runaways.


	11. The Box

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An excerpt from Patricia's early days in the cult.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING! Gaslighting, sexual abuse, statutory rape, claustrophobic confinement, and descriptions of ambiguous genitalia.  
> I have no idea why this story is mutating into one of the darkest things I've ever written.

When Violet’s husband opens the box, the first thing he does is ask her for a kiss which she grants easily knowing that he’ll close the lid and leave her until tomorrow if she doesn’t. He thanks her for the kiss and presses another to her forehead before moving to undo the leather straps on her wrists and ankles that hold her to the bottom of the box. They’re there to ensure that she doesn’t hurt herself by thrashing around. They usually sedate her in order to put her in there and her first reaction upon waking is sometimes panic. She’ll also sometimes become very anxious when she’s left in there for a very long time and panic on and off but that’s happening less and less over time as she gets better at meditating. 

It had been carefully explained to her the first time it was used on her that the box was not a punishment (after the first time they laid together, her husband had sworn he’d never hurt her again and for the most part he’s kept that promise) it’s to give her time to herself to calm down and self reflect. It also provides ample time for the mania that occasionally seizes her to pass. The mania tells her lies (like that her husband is a dangerous man who’s holding her against her will) and makes her do foolish things (like trying to escape from her husband.) It also makes her think that she resents him sometimes which can cause her to act up in less severe but equally unacceptable ways (like not doing as he says or shrinking away when he touches her.) He kisses her wrists and ankles as he undoes the straps around them. 

Her head swims when she stands but he holds her firmly to him so that she doesn’t fall. She is so grateful for him at that moment, for his unwavering strength. Once she’s steadied, he tells her to go and take a bath. She knows that he’ll be joining her in the bathroom after he’s done cleaning out the inside of the box. There is never any solid waste in there after she’s let out (because she isn’t fed anything when she’s in there) but there is usually at least a little urine. 

He waits until she leaves the room to clean it up because he knows that she’s embarrassed by it and she’s grateful for that as well, that he’s always so considerate of her feelings. She showers a few minutes just to rinse off and then runs a bath because she’s still unsteady on her feet. Her head is swimming, likely because she’s been so long without food, but she won’t mention that to him. He knows when her last meal was and he knows how often she needs to eat. He will feed her when it’s time. She does, however, cup her hands under the faucet and drink until her thirst is sated. 

She gets into the bath and the next thing she knows he’s waking her up, she had nodded off. He teases her about it but then proceeds to gently wash her. She loves feeling his fingers against her scalp when he washes her hair. When she’s washed and dried, he carries her back into the bedroom. The box has been put back into its place beneath the bed and there’s an assortment of oils on the bedside table along with a gallon of water which she waits to be offered even though the site of it brings her thirst back. 

He lets her drink about a quarter of it before taking it away and telling her to lie down. She lies on her front and he straddles her. First, he carefully combs out her hair; it was only down to her shoulders when they’d found her and now it’s only slightly past her shoulders. After spending a while kissing and nuzzling the back of her neck, he begins to rub the oil into her back. 

He’s slow and through and his hands are strong so there’s not an ounce of tension in her by the time he’s done working his way down her body. Some tension does return when he asks her to roll over because even now she’s still uncomfortable with having her body closely studied. Her breasts are just tiny mounds on her chest, not lush and full like the Omegas but he dotes on them. He plays with her nipples until they harden and then sucks them gently. He massages over her slightly-too-prominent rib cage down to her narrow hips and then between her legs. 

There’s always been a protrusion there... above her female opening. It’s like his manhood but smaller and it never grows erect like his manhood. It does, however, engorge with blood and become more sensitive the longer he plays with it. He likes taking it into his mouth and sucking it. Sometimes a tiny bit of liquid will come out in response to his ministrations and he will eagerly drink it despite her embarrassment... he’ll also drink her blood sometimes... when his headaches are back and it’s taking too long to find another sacrifice... he says that her body contains the medicine he needs but he can’t get the full benefit of it without killing her and he can’t bring himself to do that... because he loves her so. 

He slides a single finger into her feminine opening. It’s smaller and tighter than an Omega’s so it always hurts at least a little when he enters her but never as much as it did the first time they were... together. He’d had to explain to her how that worked because she hadn’t been in a state of mind to notice any details during their first time and the women who’d raised her had not even told her the names of the body parts involved. They told her that she wasn’t even meant to have a husband and that she should only touch between her legs when she washed... because God could see. 

The Omegas tell her that the protrusion is her ‘clit’ but hers doesn’t look like theirs. They say that she’s fortunate that hers is so much easier to find but she has no trouble finding theirs when they play together. He doesn’t mind them playing with eachother as long as he’s there to watch. Violet once caught Beverly and Valery playing together when he wasn’t home and told him and he was very cross with both of them. He had disciplined them in front of Violet and Rebecca (the oldest of the Omegas, who was married to him even before he started to receive his visions) and made them apologize first to him and then to their ‘sisters.’ 

The women at the convent had called themselves her sisters too but they had been lying (everyone she’d ever met before her husband found her had lied to her with every breath.) This is her REAL family. The people to whom she was born are nothing, no, less than nothing. Their sole reason for being was to bring a Beta into the world and if God is truly merciful, he didn’t suffer them to live far beyond that. Betas, her husband says, are God’s favorite of all his creations... that’s why he didn’t suffer them to bear children. 

This is also why she is told that she should not feel bad for the ones that her husband uses for medicine. He tells her that they all go to heaven and sit at God’s right hand for the rest of eternity. 

She gasps and flinches a little when he first tries to enter her but luckily he sees that this is involuntary and does not take offense. He pulls back out and applies some of the oil to his manhood and then more to his fingers and keeps working her open with one hand as he strokes himself with the other. She almost reaches down but he gives her a warning look. She’s permitted to touch herself but only when he instructs her to do so and only ever when he is watching. When he’s decided that she’s ready, he tries again to enter her and this time he slides in with minimal difficulty. There is some pain that makes her a bit anxious because it’s like a lesser version of what she felt the first time but she tries not to let her anxiety show. 

She reminds herself that she should feel privileged to receive him this way because he never vaginally penetrates his Omegas. He will penetrate them anally or have them pleasure him with their mouths (if they’ve been good, he reciprocates) but he doesn’t ever enter them like this. Patricia sometimes gets the sense that the younger Omegas are jealous of her but Rebecca doesn’t seem to be. She’s been very kind to Violet, in fact, it was she who explained to Violet what all her parts were and showed her how to manipulate them in a way that produced pleasure (with their husband watching, of course.) It was also Rebecca who showed her how to pleasure their husband with her mouth and her hands though he rarely wants that from her... because she’s so lucky. 

Now that there’s less friction, his thrusting into her has started to illicit little sparks of pleasure. This is the most that vaginal penetration ever produces in Violet. Her husband is usually more than willing to bring her to climax by playing with her ‘clit’ but she doubts he’ll be doing that this time. Usually, after he takes her out of the box, he’ll lay with her just to remind her of where she belongs and what her priorities should be (mainly, pleasing him.) She doesn’t much mind this because she’s usually tired and just wants something to eat. 

Her body seems to WANT to enjoy him, though. She flushes all over and becomes hypersensitive and her pulse races but it’s more of a nuisance than anything when she’s in this state. She does what she can to help him finish faster. When he does he lies on top of her a while and she dozes off again. When she awakes, he’s not in the room but he’s left the door slightly ajar so that she knows it’s unlocked. 

She dresses. Respectful of the fact that she doesn’t wish to dress like the Omegas, he’s had them procure a selection of modest clothing for her though she is never allowed to wear anything under her long skirt. Throughout the day he likes to pull her into his lap, slip his hand under her skirt and idly stimulate her. She goes out into the kitchen and Rebecca gives her a bowl of clear soup. When you’ve gone a long stretch of time without solid food, it’s important to refeed correctly or you can get terribly sick. 

Much later, when she’s living in a convent again and deemed old enough to begin participating in ritual fasting, the other nuns will be surprised at her natural talent for it. In a few weeks’ time, her husband will tell her that they need to relocate because the police are getting too close to finding them. As the move becomes imminent, her mania will take her and she’ll try to run away again. He will find her just outside the police station and tell her to get into the van and she’ll find herself powerless to refuse (she always is when he uses that tone.) 

When they get home, he’ll open the box and tell her to undress and lie down inside it. She will comply but tears will be standing in her eyes and she’ll keep apologizing the whole while. He will tell her that he forgives her, strap her down, and close the lid. When she’s let out again, they’ll be somewhere else but they will be there for over a month before they give her any indication of where she is.


	12. Sleepover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry gets cock blocked and also meets Patricia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: Suicide.

Dennis starts to sleep over with Barry on the nights that Jade is gone. Orwell is sometimes there but with the size of the house and the fact that Dennis only ever comes over in the evening he’s easy to avoid. He may also be making himself scarce out of consideration for Barry which is extremely nice of him considering that he owns the place. Barry convinces Dennis to keep a set of clothes here along with a set of pajamas. He sleeps in pajama pants paired with one of the ribbed tanks that he usually wears under his work shirts. Barry means to eventually ask him if he owns any clothing that he didn’t buy at the hardware store but it’s probably a little early in the relationship for that. 

Dennis doesn’t change until right when they go to bed because he’s still shy about having someone look at his body. Barry wants to find whoever made him feel this way and stone them to death for their sins against nature because GOD, the boy is GORGEOUS. Even though he’s still mostly covered, more of his skin is exposed than Barry’s seen before and the tank clings more than his shirts do. With how much effort undoubtedly goes into sculping Dennis’s body, Barry finds it hard to believe that he never wants ANYONE to look at it but he still tries not to stare... too much. Still, as Dennis climbs into bed next to him, Barry notices something low down on the back of his neck... a jagged line that isn’t the same color as the surrounding skin. 

He resolves not to ask about it, for the time being, the last thing he wants to do is make is Alpha more self-conscious. As soon as Dennis is under the covers with him Barry has to fight the urge to just... grope him, grind up against him, taste the salt of his skin... Fuck, CALM DOWN. He takes a deep breath and turns off the light. For a while, they both just lie silently in the dark but then Barry feels the mattress dip as Dennis cautiously slides over to his side of the bed. Dennis loosely wraps his arms around him and starts to pull him closer. 

As it becomes apparent that Barry’s going to come willingly (he always does), Dennis gains some confidence. He pulls the Omega flush against him and kisses him. Barry is already hard and he thinks he could cum just from this; Dennis’s body heat and the pressure of those strong arms around him and his mouth... GOD, his mouth. He runs his hands over Dennis’ back, fighting the urge to slip them under his shirt and ignoring the bumps and ridges that he can just barely feel through the thin fabric. He can take a guess at what those are and who put them there but he can’t get to work on getting Dennis’ to feel better about that until Dennis opens up to him about it... he keeps telling himself to be patient. 

He comforts himself with the knowledge that they have time. He’d told Dennis that it was alright if he needed them to take things slow in the bedroom because “it’s not like either of us is going anywhere, right?” Dennis had hesitated but then said ‘right’ and Barry could swear that the Alphas whole frame had relaxed just a little... as if he’d needed that confirmation just as much as Barry did. 

Dennis is allowed to touch Barry as much as he wants. Barry had eagerly granted him that privilege because (in case you missed it) he REALLY wants Dennis to touch him. Just as things are starting to get really interesting, Dennis’s phone rings. Dennis answers it immediately and doesn’t even bother to ask who it is because there’s only one person who ever calls him... Miss Patricia does not text. While Dennis talks to her, Barry clings to him and keeps kissing his neck. He hopes against hope that this will be the very first time that she called him about something that didn’t require his immediate attention. His hopes are dashed when Dennis moves away from him to sit up and turn on the bedside lamp. After a few minutes of clipped conversation, he says that he’ll be right there, hangs up, and then looks at Barry. 

“Sorry... it’s an emergency. I’ll try ta’ come back after.” 

He says that every time, he always does come back but Barry can’t help but wonder what exactly might stop him from doing so and why he factors in the possibility that that thing might happen every time. A thought occurs to Barry and he almost dismisses it immediately but then decides to give it a try. 

“I could come with.” 

It’s a meek suggestion. It’s never been overtly stated that Barry isn’t allowed to go home with Dennis but the general impression has been created that Dennis isn’t ready for that. As predicted, he pauses for a long time before responding but his response is less predictable. 

“...sure.” 

As they both get dressed, Barry is honestly a little nervous. What he’s been able to gather about Miss Patricia is a little... odd. The first thing he picked up on was that she’s definitely not JUST Dennis’ employer...technically she’s not his employer at all because she doesn’t pay him. He’s been living with her rent-free for about eight years in exchange for his providing any repairs that the house requires which are numerous because the place is a money pit. Her only sources of income are the rent she collects from the borders (what’s left after the upkeep is paid for) and a check that ‘the church’ sends her once a month because she ‘used to live in a convent.’ 

Admittedly, religion has never been a big part of Barry’s life. His grandmother was a Christmas-and-Easter Catholic which was fine by him because he refused to believe that any just and loving God would actually want his followers to wake up early on weekends. Still, he thinks that even if he’d gone every Sunday, the implied scenario would still raise a few questions first among them being... “used to”? Barry’s heard of Betas being turned over to the church by their parents only to leave when they’re of age but he can’t imagine why that’d result in the church sending them checks. So... she was a nun, then? Can you RETIRE from being a nun? Barry had always assumed that it was one of those “the only way out is in a body bag” type deals. 

Dennis had walked to Orwell’s house and Barry doesn’t have a car so the two of them have to walk back to the boarding house. It’s bitterly cold outside. As they walk, it’s doesn’t take long for Barry to pick up on Dennis’s anxiety. Despite having no idea why Dennis is anxious, Barry doesn’t want to make it worse. 

“... if ya’d rather I didn’t come, I can go back.” 

“N-no... just... stick by me and if ya wind up... talkin’ ta her... just don’t ask a lotta questions.” 

“About what?” 

“...anything.” 

“Can I ask you questions before we get there?” 

“...sure.” 

They keep walking. 

“Does she even know I exist?” 

“... she knows I been outta’ the house a lot lately.” 

“She keep close tabs on yer whereabouts?” 

Dennis looks a little insulted but then seems to realize that there was no malice in the question. 

“I don’t go out a whole lot unless I’m with you.” 

Barry can’t help but smile at this. 

“So I’ve been a bad influence?” 

The corner of Dennis’ mouth twitches just slightly upward. It takes about fifteen minutes to get there which is long enough to go from the “good” to the “bad” part of town. Barry’s seen the house before in passing, it’s a Victorian that was probably very beautiful when it was first built. It had always made Barry mad that whoever performer repairs on the outside of it did so with complete disregard to aesthetics; scalloped shingles were replaced with straight edged ones, when the decorative railing on the front porch fell off, it was replaced with a plain metal one. He realizes now that the person he was mad at for making such tactless repairs was Dennis... he probably shouldn’t say anything. 

There’s a young woman standing by the curb wearing a second-hand trench coat that appears to have been hastily pulled on over a cheap satin nightgown ranting to someone on her cell phone about how they need to come pick her up. Beside the woman is a little boy who perks up like a neglected dog at the approach of it’s master when he sees Dennis coming. 

“It’s rainin’ in our room!” 

He sounds excited, as though this whole thing were more of an adventure than an ordeal. Dennis smiles but it instantly fades when the boy’s mother (?) looks at him. She covers the mouthpiece of her phone. 

“About fuckin’ time! I’m gonn’a tell you what I told that old cunt, I ain’t payin’ a dime in rent this month until it’s back EXACTLY how it was.” 

“At this point, I’d have been naive to expect it...” 

The new voice comes from up on the porch where a Beta of indeterminate age (you’d have been just as inclined to believe her if she said that she was forty as you would is she said that she was sixty) has appeared. She needs no introduction. 

“... but tell me, dear, what were you punishing me for last month? Or the month before that? If the regularity with which you’ve paid your rent is a reflection of MY behavior then I’ve quite the history of indiscretions.” 

The younger woman flounders a little but then comes up with a retort. 

“Go fuck yer’self!” 

Dennis steps in front of her, blocking her view of the porch. 

“That’s enough!” 

Barry’s never seen Dennis angry before and it’s honestly pretty terrifying (... also kind of hot.) The woman clearly has seen him angry before and is unimpressed, she steps around him and resumes her argument with the Beta. 

“Lucky fer him ya’ can’t fight yer own battles or ya wouldn’t need him fer anything since ya probably actually COULD fuck yer’self. Unless yer dick’s even smaller’an his-” 

She had walked past Dennis to the middle of the front yard while she was talking, he grabs her arm and roughly yanks her back onto the sidewalk. 

“LEAVE!” He snarles, his face inches from hers. For a second Barry wonders if he should intervene but then the woman jerks out of his grip and seems to calm down a little... or maybe ‘cower’ is the word. Her voice is quieter when she speaks again, clearly she doesn’t want Patricia to hear. 

“I got someone comin’ ta pick me up.” 

“Ya’ can wait fer them at the end’a the block, we don’t need you out here shoutin’ obscenities on the front lawn in the middle’a the god damn night.” 

Though Dennis’s tone leaves no room for argument, it looks as though the woman might argue anyway but then she seems to change her mind. 

“...fine... come on, baby.” 

She holds her hand out to the little boy who sheepishly takes it but keeps glancing back at Dennis as they walk away. For her part, Patricia seems unaffected by the goings-on. Her tone is calm when she speaks. 

“I want the lock on her room changed before she returns.” 

Dennis looks as if he’s about to object but then he changes his mind, opting instead to focus on the task at hand. 

“Where’s the water comin’ from?” 

“Mr. Rampart’s room. I tried the lock but he seems to have barricaded it from the inside.” 

Dennis moves toward the door but Patricia doesn’t move aside to let him in, she’s looking behind him at Barry whom Dennis seems to have forgotten was there. 

“Uh- This is Barry... he’s a... friend.” 

The last word sounds awkward in his mouth and Barry’s not sure if it’s because he’s more than a friend or because Dennis just isn’t used to saying that word. Patricia looks Barry over. 

“This is perhaps not the best time to have a guest.” 

She’s still looking at Barry but the remark is clearly meant for Dennis. Barry responds anyway. 

“I can just... go back home.” 

Dennis cringes. 

“I don’t want you walkin’ back by yer’self.” 

Patricia rolls her eyes. 

“You can come in as long as you stay downstairs.” 

The entryway is surprisingly roomy, with curved staircases running up either side. The banisters were probably ornamental at one point to but they’ve been replaced with more of the industrial railing from the front. Patricia tells Barry to wipe his feet when he enters. She says “please” but in a way that implies that the inclusion of the word is a mere formality. Barry is left there while the two of them go upstairs. 

Eventually, he hears a thud and then a loud cracking noise. Panicked, he rushes upstairs to find that Dennis has kicked in the door to the room in question. Patricia glares at him but he doesn’t move as Dennis goes inside. There’s the sound of the tap shutting off and then a long silence during which Patricia almost goes in but then stops as Dennis reemerges looking pale. Patricia puts a hand on his arm and looks at him questioningly. 

“He’s...uh... he’s dead... in the bathtub.” He says so quietly that Barry at first thinks he misheard it (he HOPES he has.) Patricia doesn’t miss a beat before whispering ‘downstairs.’ 

The three of them go back downstairs, through the entryway and into a kitchen that appears to be a common space, except that there are locks on all the cupboards. There is also a lock on the door which Patricia secures with one of a ring of keys that she takes from the pocket of her housecoat. She turns to Dennis, finally seeming at least a little concerned. 

“Was it an accident?” 

“No... he cut his wrists... in the bathtub.” 

Patricia seems to be mulling over the information while Dennis makes a meek suggestion. 

“We should call the cops.” If Barry didn’t know better, he’d swear that it sounded like Dennis wants Patricia to disagree with him. If he did, he’s disappointed. 

“Well, yes... but... would you like to leave first? I can manage them on my own.” 

Barry, still trying to process the fact that there is a DEAD BODY upstairs, also can’t help but wonder what exactly is going on. Why would she assume that Dennis wouldn't’ want to be here when the cops came? The reason is clearly something that they both know and he doesn’t and suddenly her feels like he’s... well... alone in a decrepit Victorian mansion with two complete strangers... and a DEAD BODY. Before he can give voice to any of his confusion, Dennis speaks up again, a little more firmly this time. 

“No... I’m usually here... it’s gonna’ look suspicious that I wasn't.” 

“I’ll just tell them that you were away... with a friend.” 

At that word she looks over at Barry, who finally can’t help but speak. 

“THERE’S A DEAD BODY UP THERE!” 

Patricia glares at him again but her tone remains calm. 

“Yes, we’ve established that and we DO have other tenants so I’ll thank you to keep your voice down.” 

Suddenly, Barry feels embarrassed... as if HE’S the one who’s behaving oddly. Patricia returns her attention to Dennis. 

“Why don’t you sit down and I’ll make the phone call... try to compose yourself.” 

Dennis nods as she walks away and then looks at Barry. 

“I shouldn’t a brought you here, I don’t know what I was thinkin’.” 

Barry is torn between wanting to comfort him and wanting to agree with him so instead, he just asks the question that’s foremost in his mind. 

“Is this the first time somethin’ like this happened?” 

“...yes...” 

Dennis looks confused which makes sense since he’s not the one who’s acting eerily calm despite the DEAD BODY upstairs. Barry suddenly feels bad for Dennis and tries to think of something to say but Patricia comes back before he can. Again, she speaks only to Dennis. 

“They said they’ll be here in half an hour, now SIT. We can’t have you looking agitated when they arrive.” When Dennis immediately complies, her attention turns to Barry. She studies him thoughtfully before offering; 

“Cup of tea?”


	13. Tea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry, Dennis, and Patricia have tea and then get interviewed by the cops.

While Barry sits at the table with Dennis, Patricia goes about the process of making tea completely calmly, as if the DEAD BODY is only a mild inconvenience. Dennis, on the other hand, seems more than a little rattled but Barry can’t tell if this is because of the DEAD BODY or because of the impending visit from the police... whom Barry has just learned that Dennis is afraid of for some reason. Despite the bizarreness of the situation, he still worries about his Alpha’s mental state. 

“You ok.” 

“...yeah... I just need a minute.” 

“The floor will need refinishing.” Patricia tosses out absently and Dennis nods as if that weren’t an incredibly insensitive thing to be focusing on right now. Suddenly, something seems to occur to Dennis and he abruptly stands up. 

“I should dry the floor... the longer it sits the more damage it’s gonna’ do.” 

Patricia places a hand on his arm. 

“Best not to disrupt the scene, I think.” She says this as if it were an afterthought. Dennis frustratedly sits back down and Barry starts to wonder if he’s not actually having some sort of bizarre fever dream. He looks around for something to read because he’s heard that you can’t read in dreams. He reads a laminated note on the front of the refrigerator that reads ‘All expired food items will be promptly discarded.’ 

He’s reread it three times when Patricia returns to the table and sets out three cups and three saucers followed by a teapot. Dennis for some reason looks down into his cup and then up at her and then abruptly off to the side when he realizes that Barry is looking. Patricia quickly fills Dennis’s cup first and then fills his before filling her own. It’s black tea. Patricia settles at the head of the table and she and Dennis proceed to speak as if Barry is either not there are they suspect that he’s been struck mute... which is kind of the case. Patricia seems determined to direct Dennis’s attention to the logistics of what will need to be done in the room after the body is moved and Barry eventually realizes that this is her way of distracting Dennis so that he’ll calm down. 

“Is there blood on the grout?” 

“...probably.” 

“That’ll need replacing, then and you may as well do the unit beneath it since we’ll be showing both of them soon.” 

Dennis tenses. 

“Patricia... you know if it weren’t fer the kid, I wouldn’t care... it’s startin’ ta get cold.” 

“I thought you couldn’t evict people during the winter.” Barry’s not sure that that’s true or even why he spoke up just then, especially since it seems like he’s inadvertently taken Patricia’s side. 

“Precisely, if we wait any longer we’ll be stuck with them for the winter.” 

Dennis huffs and runs his fingers over his scalp. 

“Could we wait ta’ talk about this til after the...” He vaguely gestures out the window, presumably alluding to the approaching cops. 

“Of course...” Patricia mock-concedes. “...not that there’s anything to discuss.” 

Before Dennis can say anything, there’s a knock on the door. Patricia tells Dennis to finish his tea and goes to answer it. Barry hasn’t touched his tea because he’s pretty sure that there was something in Dennis’s cup and he’s not sure if there was something in his... why hadn’t he looked? He reads the refrigerator note again. Patricia eventually reappears with two Alphas (one male and one female) behind her. On her way in, she’s apologizing for having ‘brought you out at this hour.’ She offers them a cup of tea and the male one declines on behalf of both of them, seeming just a little charmed. 

Things speed up after that, the three of them are questioned collectively and then one at a time while the other two wait out in the entryway. During the collective questioning, the police officers initially keep talking PAST Patricia to Dennis. Of course, since he’s the only Alpha present, the automatic assumption is going to be that he’s the authority figure here. Patricia’s only response to this is a little flicker of irritation that the cops don’t seem to notice. It only takes Dennis stammering in response to a few questions for them to shift their focus from him to the most articulate person in the room which is currently Patricia. 

From the way she conducts herself, you’d guess that she was interviewed by the cops on a routine basis. The man had only been living here a few months and he’d kept to himself. She admits that during the time that it had taken Dennis to return from his ‘friends’ house, there had been an altercation between her and the tenant who had informed her of the leak. No, she doesn’t know where the woman is now. 

Barry’s interview is brief for obvious reasons, he’s asked where his ‘residence’ is and if there’s anyone there at present that can verify that Dennis had been there tonight. There wasn’t and he worries that that’s going to have some sort of negative consequences but Dennis assures him that it won’t when they’re out in the entryway together. He’s not exactly calm now but he’s not nearly as anxious as Barry expected that he would be... in fact, he seemed to have grown calmer after finishing his tea... 

Barry is less nervous while being interviewed by the cops than he is during the brief period he has to spend alone in the entryway with Patricia while Dennis is interviewed. She actually seems anxious now but it presents differently than Dennis’s anxiety did. She’s very still and tense, like a snake coiled to strike except she has no target to aim for. Barry is almost tempted to try and make conversation but before he can the men arrive to pick up the body. It’s covered but this is still the closest Barry’s ever been to a dead body. 

Patricia asks one of the people moving the body if she can dry the floor. It takes Barry a moment to figure out what she’s talking about but then he remembers that Dennis had wanted to dry the floor in the room... where the man killed himself. Patricia is told that she just can’t touch the bathroom. She thanks the man and then goes upstairs. Once she’s out of sight, Barry follows her. He finds her in the room in question...mopping the floor. 

“What are you doing?” He knows what she’s doing, he’s just having trouble processing the fact that she’s doing it RIGHT now. She offers no explanation. 

“I don’t recall inviting you upstairs.” 

“Do you... need help?” 

She shoots him a stern look. 

“If I had needed it, I would have asked for it. Please return to the lobby.” 

Again, the ‘please’ is a mere formality. Barry returns to the ‘lobby’ and sits at the bottom of the stairs until Dennis finally reemerges from the kitchen. He’s thanking the cops and looks a little drowsy. The male alpha says that they can ‘wrap things up’ after they’ve spoken to ‘the lady’ one more time. Dennis looks questioningly at Barry and nods toward the top of the stairs. 

Patricia returns alone. As she ‘wraps things up’ with them, the subtle change in her manner is a kind of eerie. She toys with her necklace in a way that’s clearly meant to communicate anxious vulnerability and her brows crease just slightly and her already gentle voice goes just a little softer. Barry goes back up to find Dennis finishing what she’d started on the floor. As he comes into the room, Dennis rushes over to shut the bathroom door, seemingly not wanting to expose his Omega to the scene of a suicide. 

His offer of help is rejected a second time so he just stands there watching Dennis mop and feeling useless. Eventually, Patricia’s voice comes from behind him, making him jump. 

“Go to bed now, Dear.” 

“I gotta’ get Barry home.” 

“I don’t want you going out at this hour. He’s a grown man, he can find the way back on his own.” 

Dennis’s jaw tenses a little. 

“Not by himself.” 

Patricia huffs. 

“Fine... keep him in your room.” 

She leaves without even acknowledging Barry. 

Dennis’s room contains only a bed, a bookshelf and a desk with a computer on it... the only surprise is that Dennis owns a computer. The sheets are scratchier than Barry is used to but the bed is also smaller which means that Dennis has to sort of wrap around him for them both to fit on it so Barry can’t complain. Dennis falls asleep unusually quickly but Barry lies awake for another half an hour wondering what was in that tea.


	14. Cradle to Grave.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry and Dennis wake up together.  
> Dennis and Patricia have a conversation.  
> Barry has a separate conversation.

The next morning Barry is able, for a moment, to believe that he and Dennis hadn’t left Orwell’s the night before and that the following events had been a dream... but then he opens his eyes and sees that he’s still in that house. The blow is considerably softened, though, by the fact that Dennis is still holding him. He decides to prolong dealing with the situation just a little longer and settles back against his Alpha. Eventually, Dennis stirs and begins to kiss his neck. Barry tilts his head to grant him better access. 

Those strong hands begin to roam his torso, making it blessedly easy for him to forget that he’s been in the same room as a dead body within the past twenty-four hours. One makes its way down to the waistband of his pants but then its owner’s confidence seems to falter. 

“Do you want me to?” Dennis’s hoarse whisper, lips brushing Barry’s ear, is enough to dissolve the Omega’s reservations. 

“You can do whatever you want ta’ me.” Barry’s aware of how pathetic he’s sounds but he doesn’t care, he NEEDS Dennis to touch him. When that big, warm hand wraps around his length Barry moans louder than he probably should with how thin the walls in this place are. It hurts because theirs no lube (later Barry will wonder if Dennis masturbates without lube since he didn’t seem to think it was needed here) but it doesn’t matter because it doesn’t last long. It’s the first time Dennis has ever directly touched him there, it only takes a few strokes and Barry cums into that beautiful hand. 

Dennis holds him still, an arm around his waist and the other hand gripping his cock, until the aftershocks of his orgasm pass. After a few minutes of afterglow, the Alpha carefully disentangles himself and goes into the bathroom. Barry hears him washing his hands and tells himself that it’s stupid to feel rejected because of a thing like that. Dennis comes back into the room but, to Barry’s disappointment, doesn’t get back into the bed. 

“You want the shower first?” 

Barry tries not to let his confusion show. 

“I’d rather you come back over here and let me return the favor.” 

Dennis blushes and looks down, biting his lower lip the way that he does when he’s nervous (why is he nervous?). 

“That was just... fer you.” 

Barry slips out from under the covers and walks over to his Alpha. He wraps his arms around the taller man’s neck and pulls him down for a kiss. Barry holds the kiss as long as he can and presses against Dennis, then he realizes what the problem is. Dennis isn’t hard. This wouldn’t be a big deal if it weren’t for the fact that, in Barry’s experience, Dennis has the libido of a teenager... sometimes eye contact is enough to get him going. Barry decides that it’d be best not to make a big deal about it. 

“You can have the shower first.” 

He gives Dennis another little peck on the lips before the Alpha retreats. Left alone, Barry tries to fight the urge to snoop. After all, he knows so little about Dennis, and what he’s found out since last night has only raised more questions. He takes a peek into the closet (swearing to himself that he’s ONLY going to peek) but all that’s there is the expected rack of navy blue utility clothes. Beneath the shirts are his work boots... his only boots and besides those is a pair of running shoes. 

There’s a small chest of drawers off to one side in which Barry assumes that undergarments (those ribbed tanks are obviously bought in bulk so the rest probably is too) and pajama pants (all the exact same blue checked plaid so probably bought in bulk too) are kept. Dennis doesn’t even seem to own the standard button-down and dress slacks that most men have on hand just in case, for a job interview or a court date, and something about that makes Barry sad. Has Dennis ever even had a job interview? He has a part-time gig in a warehouse but that seems like the sort of job you just need to pass a drug test land and Barry doubts there was any sort of formal hiring process for his REAL job... keeping this building from falling apart. Still... he’s only had that eight years which means that he was twenty-one when he got it... what did he do before that... there’s a gap there during which he was... what? Waiting for Patricia to come along? And exactly when and (most importantly) HOW did that happen? 

...and what the FUCK was in that tea? 

\------- 

Dennis showers as quickly as he can while still being thorough. It’s late... he doesn’t know what time it is but he knows that it’s late because it’s not before dawn and that’s usually when he gets up. He gets out of the shower and dries and dresses and then takes his pills (anti-psychotic and anti-depressant) with a handful of water form the bathroom sink. He goes to put the pills back in the medicine cabinet but then pauses... he can’t be sure Barry won’t look in there. He slips the pills into one of the roomy pockets of his utility pants, takes a few deep breaths, and then goes back into the bedroom. 

Barry is over by his closet but that’s fine because there’s nothing in there that he shouldn’t see. Just looking at the Omega makes him hate Valium even more. This is a new thing since he usually welcomes the reprieve from his libido which is usually an unwelcome distraction. This thing that he feels for Barry is different, though. He hadn’t thought that he could feel lust without anger, guilt, and shame accompanying it. It’s soothing, not like the way that pretty young female Omegas make him feel. Barry looks at him almost long enough for him to start getting nervous but then kisses him again and walks into the bathroom. 

“Wait fer me in the lobby downstairs.” 

He waits until he hears an ‘alright’ through the door before he goes downstairs. Miss Patricia is going to be upset and he hates it when she’s upset, especially when it’s his fault. Alright, the WHOLE situation isn’t his fault (he didn’t kill the guy) but he did bring outside parties into the situation that have made things more complicated. Barry was just a momentary lapse in judgment but... Crystal... Miss Patricia hadn’t even wanted to rent to her in the first place, let alone let her stay even after she’d paid late more than once but Dennis had backed her because of the kid... because he’s soft and Crystal had taken advantage of that and Miss Patricia had told him she would but he hadn’t listened... he always winds up regretting not listening to her. Now the “little cat” (that’s what Miss Patricia calls loose women... maybe it’s an English thing?) is out there somewhere and the police are going to be poking around and if they find her and question her who knows what she’ll say? 

He finds her in the kitchen as expected but by now the tenants have started to wake up. Most of the tenants try to avoid using the kitchen when possible, storing food there but preparing it with the hot plates and microwaves that they keep in their rooms. One exception is Mr. Anthony, who lived here even before Miss Patricia bought the building. He used to be in the army but now he lives off of an army pension. The law makes it so that he pays less than the others and it’s basically impossible to evict him but Miss Patricia doesn’t mind him; he was brought up Catholic so he knows how to behave around her. 

Dennis and Mr. Anthony exchange good mornings before Miss Patricia takes Dennis’s arm and leads him out of the room. They go to her room, the buildings one attic bedroom, presumably so that they can speak uninterrupted. 

“The police will be returning to reexamine the bathroom and interview some of the tenants, I think it would be best if you were out of the house until at least five.” 

He nods, this shouldn’t be hard, he works form twelve to three today. 

“I’m gonna’ need the card ta’ get what I need fer the floor.” 

She nods and takes the debit card from the pocket of her skirt (she always wears a long black skirt and a shirt with a high collar... she is not a ‘cat.’) She hands it to him but doesn’t let go when he tries to take it. 

“Don’t forget the lock.” 

He swallows, of course, that was going to come back up. 

“... I’l get it.” 

She holds on to the card and looks at him skeptically. He WILL get it, he’ll even install it but... 

“What if I get this months rent out of ‘er?” 

She looks insulted. 

“Am I to be grateful for receiving something that I should have gotten a week ago?” 

He doesn’t know what to say to this because she’s right, like usual. Crystal pays late most months and even then only after she’s reminded. She SHOULD be get evicted but... 

“Please just... til spring, alright? Then I’ll get rid of ‘er... it ain’t the kid's fault his mother is...” 

He can’t think of anyone word that summarizes that woman. Miss Patricia sighs and suddenly looks exhausted. 

“Do you think it wise to be dolling out charity when we can’t even afford to replace the furnace.” 

“It don’t need ta’ be replaced. I can get it workin’ again just... please just let be my problem.” 

“But who, considering how little we’ve seen of you around here lately, do you suppose that they will take their grievances to when the temperature drops?” 

Dennis feels guilty. Usually, the tenants go right to him about repairs but, she’s right, they can’t do that when he’s not here. 

“I’m sorry I been... distracted.” 

She lets go of the card and crosses her arms. 

“...and where did you find that one?” 

At first he’s tempted to lie and say that he met Barry at work or something but then remembers that she can usually tell when he’s lying... he’s not very good at it. 

“We met through a... thing Dr. Fletcher had me do.” 

He regrets mentioning Dr. Fletcher immediately. He wishes that they got along better because they’re the only two people who care about him but Dr Fletcher is both a psychiatrist and an unattached Omega and those are two groups of people Miss Patricia doesn’t care for. Her brows rise. 

“...thing?” 

\------ 

Barry comes out of the bathroom, not thrilled about having to put the same clothes he slept in back on. He’s tempted to look around the room some more but fights the temptation... it’s not like there’s much to look at anyway. He stands in the entryway for what feels like a long time until he decides to try the door to the kitchen because at least he can sit down in there. It’s not only unlocked but occupied by an elderly male Alpha eating something that might be oatmeal but had more of a soup-like consistency. Barry will eventually learn that Patricia provides her tenants two meals; breakfast which is usually oatmeal with too much water in it and dinner which is usually ‘clear soup’ (basically water with cooked vegetables in it.) On a normal day, she and Dennis are up well before the tenants and she makes him something more substantial for breakfast (probably in acknowledgment of the undeniable fact that a man his size can’t live off of water down oatmeal) but she eats what she feeds the tenants... when she does eat... which she’s only occasionally seen doing. 

(Far down the road, Jade will speculate that ‘maybe if she had some solid food once in a while, she wouldn’t be such a Goddam bitch.’) 

“Morning.” The old man seems amicable enough so Barry goes further into the kitchen. 

“Hi... I’m Barry.” 

“Dave Anthony.” The man extends a hand without rising. Barry takes it. “...you a guest?” 

“Yeah, uh, I’m a friend’a Dennis.” 

“That so?” The man looks at Barry as if he’s just claimed to have accomplished a feat that’s not impossible, but very unlikely; like summiting Mount Everest or landing on the moon. 

“...yeah?” 

“Huh, we’ve been wondering where he’s been running off to lately. Far as I knew he didn’t have much of a social life.” The man laughs a little but then seems to worry he’s offended Barry. “Good man though keeps the place in good shape.” 

Barry cautiously takes a seat at the table. 

“You been here long?” 

“Since before she bought the place. It was in pretty bad shape back then, the old owners didn’t even live here so they didn’t really keep tabs on things.” 

Barry will also eventually learn that when any of the tenants refers vaguely to a ‘she,’ they’re talking about Patricia. 

“Well she... seems like the type ta’ keep tabs.” 

The man laughs again. Barry doesn’t want to seem rude, but he can’t help but ask. 

“You get along ok with ‘er?” 

“Well... I was brought up Catholic so I’ve got a lotta respect for those ladies.” 

“So she IS a nun?” 

The old man looks hesitant as if the answer is a longer story than Barry may be up for. 

“Uh... you remember that convent that used to be on 84th street?” 

Barry shakes his head. 

“Gee, it was probably about... ten years ago now, they shut the place down.” 

“Why?” 

The man looks as if he’s irritated by something he’s remembering. 

“Oh, some ‘discplinary issue.’” 

Now Barry is really intrigued. 

“How do ya’ mean?” He tries to seem as if he’s only asking to be polite because the old man clearly does want to tell the story. 

“Well, I don’t know how much you know about these things but before the incident that convent only let in lifers-” 

“Lifers?” 

“You know, cradle to grave, ones that the church took in when they were babies but then the rules changed and a lot of the lifers left and picking got slim so they relaxed their standards -if you ask me that was their first mistake- and this one nun who became a nun on her own when she was eighteen enrolled there because she’d heard about how traditional they were -most of those more liberal convents may as well be hippie communes- but, ya see, she wasn’t as tough as the lifers so she couldn’t hack it there and then she runs off and cries on the shoulder of some Omega reporter- no offense- who writes a story about how those mean old nuns mistreated this poor little girl and it got a lot of public attention so, to take the heat off, the church closed down the place and sent the novices somewhere else and sort of-uh- retired the gals who’d been running the place.” 

“So... she IS a nun then?” 

“As far as I’m concerned, she is because if the world were in better shape she still would be-” 

Barry starts to regret asking questions because this is clearly a hot button issue for this guy. 

“-and those Beta-libers have the nerve to complain about how no one respects them and there's no place for them in society when you know who did respect them? The church and you know where there was a place for them? In the church but that wasn’t good enough for them, they had to go and try and be Alphas because that’s what everyone’s doing now when the fact of the matter is that only Alphas are Alphas, Omegas are Omegas and Betas are Betas. One’s not better than the others, they're just different and no amount of new-age bullshit is gonna’ make them the same. You can’t rewrite GOD’S plan and the foundation of civilization as we know it is the traditional pack hierarchy-” 

“Barry.” Barry is profoundly relieved to hear Dennis’s voice. “Sorry I kept ya’ waitin’.” 

Barry stands and eagerly goes over to him. 

“It’s ok... we were just havin’ a little... chat.” 

The old man stands and Barry sees that one of his legs is a prosthetic. 

“It’s been a pleasure.” He shakes Barry’s hand again. “And I meant what I said, this one (he gestures to Dennis) is a good man, he’s just a REAL Alpha and that’s not a popular thing to be nowadays.” 

“Thank you.” Dennis says as if he’s not sure that’s the appropriate response and turns his attention to Barry. “C’mon, I’ll walk ya’ home.” 

\------ 

Barry is relieved to get out into the cold, clear morning. He hadn’t realized how claustrophobic that place was until he got out of it. He had meant to ask Dennis questions about last night but suddenly he’s not up to it. He decides to leave it until the next time they're alone. 

“I’m sorry about... everything.” Barry isn’t sure which things Dennis is referring to but his answer would be the sane regardless. 

“Don’t worry about it, I asked to come with and yu couldnt ‘a known any ‘a that would happen.” 

Dennis concedes with a nod and Barry decides to change the subject. 

“What ya’ got goin’ on ta’day?” 

“Just some errands... then I gotta’ work. Miss Patricia wants me ta’ keep clear’a the house until the cops are done.” 

Barry wants to ask why but he tells himself not yet. The last twenty-four hours has been stressful for both of them and he doesn’t want to give Dennis any more. 

“Well, how about you come back ta’ my place after work?” 

Dennis chews his lip. 

“Thought ya’ said Jade was comin’ back?” 

“She is but... I met some’a your people, you may as well meet mine.” 

Barry is almost sure that Dennis is going to decline but then... 

“Sure... why not.”


	15. Keep things casual.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry tells Jade and Orwell about the previous night.  
> Dennis reflects on his (lack of) a future.

“So it’s like in fairy tales when there’s a princess in a tower bein’ guarded by a dragon and a night has to save her except instead of a princess, there’s Dennis and instead of a castle there’s a boarding house and instead of a knight there’s me and instead of a dragon there’s a retired nun.” 

“Nuns can retire?” 

“... I guess...” Barry’s not sure how much he should tell Jade, especially since he doesn’t even know how credible of a source the old man is but... he HAS to tell someone... it’s just SO weird. “If I tell ya’ something, can you promise not ta’ bring it up ta’ Dennis?” 

Jade nods but in a quick, eager way that makes Barry unsure but... it’s SO weird. 

“So... this old guy who was in the kitchen at the boarding house when I was waiting fer Dennis told me that the church made her retire cause’a some ‘disciplinary issue’ at a convent that used ta’ be on 84th street.” 

“Was it in the building where the special needs school is now?” 

Barry shrugs. 

“Who’d she ‘discipline’ and, like, how?” 

“He said it was a younger nun that came there herself when she was 18-” 

“Who joins a convent on purpose?” 

“Some people, I guess.” Barry shrugs again. “He said that she went to this convent cause she heard how hardcore the nuns there were but since she wasn’t raised a nun I guess she was freaked out by the stuff they did.” 

“...like what?” 

“I don’t know, I don’t know what goes on in those places.” 

“Well, we could Google nun on nun discipline but we’d probably have ta’ sift through a mountain’a porn before we found anything.” 

They both laugh before Barry goes on. 

“She ran away and told a reporter what happened and the reporter wrote a story about it that got the church real nervous so they closed the convent down.” 

“Damn... so we’re gonna’ find that article, right?” 

It genuinely had not occurred to Barry that that was an option until right now but of course, he agrees. When a google search turns up nothing except the inevitable ‘naughty nun’ themed porn they decide to wait until Orwell gets home since he has access to some databases that aren’t publicly available. Jade rushes him as soon as he gets in the door, informs him that he police may be contacting them, and then tells him what Barry has told her as a lead into asking about the article. After taking a while to settle in and have a drink, Orwell fires up his office computer. Within fifteen minutes, they have it. 

It’s a section of a newspaper that’s been photocopied and uploaded. Orwell skims it and gives them the gist. 

“The girl had become a nun at eighteen but was twenty when the events in question took place. She was dissatisfied with her experience at her original convent and so sought out a transfer to The Blessed Sisterhood of the Inner Temple, one of the last orders in America that still practiced advanced mortification; which is the offering up of ones own pain or discomfort to God-” 

“So it WAS some kind’a kinky shit?” Jade interrupts. 

“Umm... it doesn’t seem as though it was meant to be sexual... she claimed that as a part of a ‘cleansing ritual’ she was fed less and less each passing day until eventually, she was living on water... At the time of the interview, she exhibited burns, cuts, bruises, and abrasions that she claims were given to her during ‘violent rituals’ that they would perform on her in order to ‘purge the influence of the secular world’ from her soul...” 

“So it was some kind’a sick shit?” Jade sounds a little closer to angry now. 

“... while all this was being done to her, she was still required to participate in the daily routines of the convent which involved two masses a day (morning and night) as well as the maintenance of the convent itself but she was not permitted to converse freely with any ‘non-superior’ nuns.” 

“How long was she there?” Barry actually feels a little queasy now and almost wishes that he hadn’t brought this up. Orwell reads a little further before responding. 

“A few months.” 

He clicks a link below the article that seems to lead to a related article. 

“The order neither confirmed or denied any specific claim, saying only that the girl was not treated any differently than any other inductee into their order, that she was warned upon joining that their practices were particularly rigorous and emphasized repeatedly that she was never held against her will and had the ability to leave at any time. The Vatican’s statement says that the Vatican was unaware of any ‘untoward practices’ within the order and that the matter would be thoroughly investigated.” 

He clicks another link. 

“There was a follow-up article about the dissolution of the convent and the resignation of the Mother Superior and her inner circle following a Vatican investigation that involved an examination of the convent itself as well as medical examinations of all its residents.” 

He clicks another link. 

“Some time later another journalist was able to secure an interview with the Beta physician enlisted to conduct physicals on all the convents residents, of which there were thirty-one. The doctor claimed that, since he was a ‘he,’ none of them were willing to be alone with him in the exam room. The exams had to be performed two at a time and exposing as little below their necks as possible... His main point of concern was that they all seemed to be underweight.” 

Barry is hesitant to ask. 

“Does it give any names?” 

“No, the case was handled as much out of the public eye as possible.” 

He reads a little further but then looks up at Jade. 

“... Chinese for dinner?” 

“Sure.” 

Orwell rises to leave the room, leaving the computer logged in for Barry but Barry stops the two of them before they reach the door. 

“We’re probably gonna’ be havin’ a fourth fer dinner... it’s not a big deal but... Dennis might be droppin’ over after work.” 

As is often the case Jade speaks before Orwell can. 

“Holy shit! And I’m not supposed ta’ bring any’a this up ta’ him?” 

“I wanna’ keep things casual fer tonight, hon, and I think bringin’ up his land lady’s past as a kinky nun might interfere with that.” 

“Yer killin’ me!” 

Jade exits the office dramatically but Orwell lingers behind. 

“And why might the police be contacting us?” 

“Oh, yeah... I kinda’ saw a dead body at Dennis’s place last night.” 

“And this had something to do with his landlady?” 

“No, not like (he gestures to the computer) that, he just got a call from her ta’ break into an apartment cause the guy in it killed himself in the bathtub and forgot ta turn the faucet off.” 

Orwell nods and seems to be mulling this over before he speaks again. 

“Does he have any food allergies I should know about?” 

“The... dead guy?” 

“No, Dennis.” 

“Right, heh, I don’t THINK so.” 

Orwell goes into the living room, presumably to discuss where they’ll be ordering from with Jade. Barry sit’s down where Orwell had been and looks over the article. Orwell had done a decent job of whittling it down to the vital information but Barry finds himself clicking around more for information about the convent. It was first founded in the late 1700s and had apparently always had a focus on ‘mortification.’ The nuns that lived there were a ‘cloistered order’ (Barry doesn’t know what that means.) 

The mother superior at the time of the incident had only been mother superior for about a year, the previous one having resigned when they were required to start letting ‘non-lifers’ in claiming that she could not bear to ‘stand by and watch this place be polluted by the secular world.’ Barry skims for any hint that Patricia might have been there but the most he finds is a mention of nuns having been sent there from overseas at multiples points to supplement the depleted supply of them in the United States. Apparently America had been among the first countries to outlaw the surrendering of infants to the church which has lead to a decline in the number of nuns as that had been their ‘primary means of recruitment.’ Well, that doesn’t sound shady at all, Barry thinks sarcastically. 

\------ 

Dennis spends his whole shift trying to think of excuses to back out of going to Barry’s later. He wants to see Barry but... Jade’s been something of a looming specter in their relationship, at least for Dennis. He can smell the female Omega on Barry all the time and on Barry’s sheets. He knows that, as an Alpha, he shouldn’t be intimidated but this is someone that’s been Barry’s closest confidant since he was practically a child. It’s also not easy to forget that Barry lives in the home of one of Jade’s alphas. 

Orwell has been polite to Dennis the few times they’ve encountered eachother but that doesn’t erase the fact that Barry has technically been under him (in terms of pack structure) for years now and that’s been the case because of Barry’s need to stay close to Jade. Think of all this makes Dennis even more nervous because it forces him to also think about the future which has always been hard for him. Assuming that he and Barry even HAVE a future (which is no small feat), how exactly is this going to work? Dennis doubts that Orwell would just let another Alpha move onto his property and even if he would Dennis would be ashamed to. Still, he can’t see Barry leaving Jade to be with him, and even if he did... WHERE would they live? 

Considering what Barry seems to be used to, Dennis doubts that the Omega would be happy sharing a single room with him. Dennis thinks about how far he is from ever owning a house of his own or ANY property at all and a wave of self-loathing washes over him. Barry doesn’t need him and would be better off without him. If he REALLY cared, he’d let Barry go, cut ties with him, never see him again, let him go ahead and live the happy, uncomplicated life he would undoubtedly have without the burden of being emotionally attached to someone with no future and a past that he could probably never tell him about. By the time he gets out of work, he’s made up his mind that he’ll be letting Barry go but then he calls him to cancel and instead winds up asking if he should bring anything. Of course, Barry’s response is ‘just yourself, stud.’


	16. Flowers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dennis goes to dinner.

Dennis gets flowers from the gas station on his way to Barry’s, then feels stupid for getting them and tries to throw them away but then decides that that would be wasteful so he decides that he’ll leave them in the truck. He only uses the truck to go to work and to haul supplies from the hardware store only using his own money to buy gas, never Miss Patricia’s. Under normal circumstances, he’d have dropped the vehicle off at home and then walked to Barry’s but he doesn’t want to run the risk of just happening to show up when the cops are still there. He hates that he has to park it on the street where all of Mr. Orwell’s neighbors can see it but he doesn’t want to assume that he’s allowed to park in the driveway. All that’s in the driveway is a new-looking compact, car that MIGHT be a Prius but Dennis doesn’t have much of an eye for cars... it looks expensive though... he can see that. 

He sits in the truck for a while, alternately considering just driving away and reconsidering the flowers. Ultimately, he decides to leave them where they are but that he should probably get out and go to the door before they notice him sitting out here... maybe they already have. He can’t bring himself to touch the doorbell so he uses his cloth but puts it away quickly after. If Barry’s noticed it yet, he hasn’t said anything but Dennis is always discrete in using it around him so he may not have. To his profound relief, Barry answers the door. 

“Hey stud.” The Omega rises up on the balls of his feet to kiss Dennis on the lips and Dennis guesses that he’s passed the point of no return on this whole ‘going to dinner’ thing. 

“Sorry if I’m late.” 

“Yer fine, it ain’t an occasion or nothin’ so there wasn’t a set time.” Barry takes Dennis’s hand and leads him into the house. The lobby is the same but feels alien... more cold and cavernous than usual. Before leading him into one of the sitting rooms (for the first time Dennis wonders why anyone needs more than one) Barry seems to sense his discomfort. 

“Relax.” He runs a hand up and down Dennis’s forearm. “She don’t bite and I promise there’s no dead bodies here.” 

Barry laughs and Dennis wonders if it’s normal for that to have become a joke between them by now. He supposes, though, that nothing about the situation is normal and it’s better Barry laugh about it than have any more predictable reaction. Dennis is lead into a sitting room that he’s been in a few times already but now feels as alien as the lobby because he’s walking in on a scene already in progress. The ghost of his lawyer is on the sofa with a woman under his arm that can only be Jade. The way she smiles and eagerly stands to greet him leaves little doubt in Dennis’s mind that she also knows who he is. Still, Barry introduces them. 

“Jade, Dennis. Dennis, Jade. You’ve already met Orwell.” 

Jade reaches over and takes Dennis’s hand without him offering it and doesn’t shake it so much as just briefly holds it in hers. She looks comically surprised at how much bigger his hand is than hers and then lets go. 

“Bout time, I was startin’ ta’ think Barry was hidin’ you from me.” 

Dennis doesn’t know what to say so he doesn’t say anything but luckily, as will so often be the case in the future, Barry fills in the gap. 

“I wanted ta’ ease him in ta life around here.” 

That sticks in Dennis’s head (‘life around HERE’?) but he doesn’t have time to dwell on it before Barry tugs his arm again. 

“Let’s go get ya’ some food.” 

There are a variety of takeout containers on the island in the kitchen. Barry tells him what each of them is and asks what he wants and he says that he’ll have whatever Barry is having. Barry smirks and fixes him a plate and something about his Omega’s cheerful eagerness to take care of him makes Dennis feel... selfconscious but in a way that isn’t unpleasant. He thinks about kissing the little patch of skin just behind Barry’s ear but doesn’t. Barry turns and hands him the plate. 

“You plan on stayin’ here tonight?” 

Dennis WANTS to say yes. 

“I can’t, I gotta’ get home and see how things went with the cops.” 

“Right... of course... you worried about how that might pan out?” 

...what does he mean? 

“It’ll probably be fine. I just want the whole thing ta’ be over with and I don’t like her handlin’ it herself.” 

“Well, she seems pretty... tough.” 

Dennis doesn’t like the way he says that but he’s not sure WHY he doesn’t like it so he just agrees. 

“She is.” 

Barry pecks him on the cheek and walks toward the kitchen door but stops before he reaches it. 

“Just call me tomorrow an’ let me know how the whole thing turned out, ok?” 

“Sure.” 

They go back into the sitting room together and the conversation that had been going on there abruptly stops. Orwell abruptly pulls Jade back into his side in a manner that seems significant but Dennis isn’t sure how. Dennis and Barry settle in on the couch opposite the other two. The television is on but the volume is low. Jade is the first to break the silence. 

“So, what exactly do ya do?” 

“I’m the super of boarding house.” 

“Yeah? How ya wind up with a gig like that?” 

“Uh... same way ya do any job...” Dennis tries to shift the focus off of him. “What da’ you do?” 

“Among other things, this one.” She leans further into her Alpha. “He’s got enough so I don’t have ta’ work.” 

“I’m a history professor at Temple University.” Dennis immediately can’t help but wonder just how much a thing like that pays because he wouldn’t have thought enough to afford all...THIS. It must show on his face because the other man elaborates. “I also inherited a modest estate from my father's side of the family.” 

“Babe, we been over this, sayin’ shit like ‘modest estate’ don’t make ya sound like any less of a W.A.S.P.” The remark seems a little cutting but Orwell is unperturbed. Jade turns her attention back to Dennis. “His family is loaded, this ain’t even the only house they own.” 

“But it is the only house I own.” Orwell interjects. “My sister Poppy and her pack own the hunting lodge and father left Samuel the summer house on the condition that he finishes college.” 

Dennis suddenly feels even more out of place. The other man may as well be casually discussing the logistics of space travel. 

“Yeah, I’d’ a gone ta’ college too if someone else paid fer it an’ gave me a beach house when I finished.” Jade laughs. Orwell seems to pick up on Dennis’s discomfort because he tries to change the subject. 

“Do you have any family in the area?” 

“No...” Dennis scrambles in his head for more to say but there isn’t anything that he feels safe adding. Barry comes to his rescue again. 

“He was a foster kid like me an’ Jade. What’s Samuel goin’ for anyway?” 

“Political Science.” 

“God help us all.” Jade rolls her eyes. 

“He’s the Devil.” Barry discretely whispers in Dennis’s ear. 

For some reason Jade keeps refocusing on Dennis. 

“So you still in touch with anyone from back then? I mean, most’a my foster parents weren’t shit but I’m still friends with some’a the other kids.” 

She seems to expect Dennis to say something here but he has no idea what and when that becomes apparent she keeps going. 

“And, like, were ya’ mostly with foster families or in group homes or maybe more like an... orphanage situation?” 

Orwell for some reason gives her a warning look and she shrugs. 

“I’m just curious cause Barry says ya don’t talk about it a lot.” 

“He doesn’t have ta’ talk about it.” Barry cuts in, sounding a little agitated. Dennis isn’t sure what either of them is implying and it’s making him nervous. Suddenly, something on television draws both their attention. It’s some sort of news program where they’re scrutinizing a movie poster of a young Beta wearing a see-through dress. 

“I KNEW it was a McQueen!” Barry says so suddenly and energetically that it makes Dennis jump. He explains. “Ok, so this movie has a serial killer in it that’d dress his victims up like the patron saint of Betas except the clothes would be all see-through and then in the early 2000s Alexander McQueen, he was a fashion designer who liked to use Beta models, did a controversial show where he dressed all the models up in costumes that were like the ones the serial killer put on his victims except they had dominatrix outfits underneath and a bunch’a people got pissed off about it being exploitive but he swore that it wasn’t inspired by the killings and was just supposed ta’ be about the dichotomy’a the way Betas are depicted in pop culture and, he’s dead, but this movie that’s about the killings used one’a his dresses in a poster... except without the dominatrix part... so now people are freakin’ out about that.” 

“Huh.” Dennis has no feelings about any of this but he doesn’t want to be too obvious about that because it all seems very important to Barry... for some reason. 

“But ya’ know they wanted people ta’ freak out about it.” Jade says. “Ta’ get attention fer the movie.” 

“Yeah, but they shouldn’t mess around with the man’s legacy just fer the sake’ a sensationalism.” 

“Yer tellin’ me yer 100% sure that he wouldn’t of WANTED that?” 

“Yeah, because when he was alive HE said that HIS work wasn’t inspired by the killings and I believe him.” 

Barry and Jade fall into a moderately heated debate about rather or not this man McQueen would have wanted his dress on that poster... Dennis eats his food. At some point, Orwell shoots him a commiserating look. Dennis wishes that he could ask Orwell more about his father but he can’t think of a way to do it without raising questions about why he wants to know. He hadn’t even known that the man had had any children but, of course, why would he have mentioned that to the teenage murderer that he was representing. His original public defender had been clear that the best Dennis could hope for was life in prison and that even that didn’t look promising but then a man had come to see him and told him that he could get him a ‘better deal’ if Dennis just turned his case over to him. 

Dennis had told the man that he couldn’t pay him anything but the man had only smiled and told him that he was one of the ‘lucky few lawyers who has the privilege of concerning himself purely with ensuring that justice is done.’ At least Dennis knows now why he’d had that ‘privilege’... he’d been rich. Eventually, the debate loses steam, and then Jade’s attention is for some reason back on Dennis again. 

“Ya know, Violet was a nun.” It seems as if she expects this to mean something to Dennis. Barry speaks before he can. 

“Everyone knows that, hun.” 

“I bet he didn’t.” She returns her attention to Dennis. “You don’t seem like the type ta’ follow that sort’a thing.” 

“What sort’a thing?” 

“I mean... ya didn’t know the movie was comin’ out.” 

“We don’t have a television.” 

“Who’s ‘we’?” 

“Jade.” Orwell breaks in in a warning tone but pulls that punch by kissing her on the temple. “She’s just curious about you.” 

“You’re a regular man’a mystery.” 

All at once the realization hit’s Dennis like a splash of cold water. She’s been trying to direct the conversation to Miss Patricia... Barry has told her SOMETHING that’s made her curious but... what? Dennis stays there about another hour during which Barry carefully ensures that the conversation stays light. Eventually, Dennis’s phone rings and it’s Miss Patricia telling him that the coast is clear. He is suddenly very eager to be home with her. 

“I gotta’ head out.” He stands “It’s been...” 

“Sure has.” Jade quips. Orwell stands and shakes his hand. 

“It’s been a pleasure meeting you.” 

Dennis nods more out of eagerness to be out of there than agreement. 

“I’ll walk ya’ ta’ yer car.” Barry rises and follows Dennis to the door. Once they’re alone, Dennis wants to say SOMETHING but he doesn’t know what. He could ask Barry what Jade had been getting at but he can’t prove that she was getting at anything so that might just make him look paranoid... Maybe he IS paranoid. 

“Can I see you tomorrow?” Barry's voice breaks through the fog in his mind. 

“Uh- I don’t think so. I gotta’ fix up that room an’ get the furnace running.” 

Barry looks disappointed but nods. 

“Just gimme’ a call, ok? If ya get the chance.” 

“Of course.” 

Barry suddenly smiles and then pecks Dennis on the lips. 

“Ya’ did good tonight.” 

Dennis drives home feeling an uncomfortable mix of things... He likes being told that he did good but... there’s just... something... gnawing at the back of his brain like a swarm of gnats. He’s for some reason vaguely worried about Miss Patricia so much so that there’s a palpable rush of relief when he sees her. She’s waiting up for him in the kitchen... she’s already made him a cup of tea. She looks at him quizzically when he enters and he realizes that he’s holding the flowers he’d gotten earlier. 

He hands the flowers to her and she gingerly takes them, being careful not to touch his hands. He does sometimes buy her flowers (with his own money, when they’re on sale at the grocery store) but he doesn’t give them to her directly. He’ll leave them on the counter for her to find and she’ll take them and put them in the vase in her room, not saying anything. It doesn’t bother him, he doesn’t know how to react when people give him gifts either... not that that happens a lot. She’ll usually leave something in his room on his birthday. Last time it was a wristwatch. 

“His family is making a bit of a fuss but the officers assured me that our end was settled.” 

“So I can get ta’ work on the room tomorrow.” 

“Yes.” 

She nods meaningfully at the full cup in front of him. She wants to make sure that he gets enough sleep tonight... he doesn’t like the valium but it’s touching that she worries about him. For a moment she just silently regards the flowers cradled in her right arm. 

“Did you go to your friend's house?” 

“Uh- They had me over fer dinner.” 

She goes quiet long enough that he worries she’s getting upset again. 

“Dennis, I want to understand that I only got upset this morning because I’m concerned about you... you do, don’t you?” 

“Of course.” 

“I simply don’t know what manner of person he is and you do tend to lose your good sense around Omegas.” 

Of course, she’s referring to the situation with Crystal. It irks him because he’s explained to her again and again that it’s NOT about the Omega, it’s about her child. He’s not about to say anything, though because she’s told him that she’ll let them stay the winter if he gets the furnace working tomorrow and he doesn’t want to risk making her change her mind. He will defend Barry though. 

“Barry’s a good man.” 

“Well I certainly do hope so for your sake.” He feels her hand briefly on the back of his neck. “Be a dear and wash your cup before you go to bed.” 

After she’s left, Dennis downs the dregs of his tea... it’s bitter from the dissolved tablet. As he lies down in bed he get’s the sense of peace he usually does from knowing that she’s just above him and that no one could get to her during the night without him hearing them go up the stairs, confident that even valium couldn’t dull his vigilance where she’s concerned. Under normal circumstances, the day's events would have him tossing and turning but instead, he falls into a deep and dreamless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thinking of renaming this and changing the description because it's starting to have a lot more to do with Patricia than initially planned and it's going to have even more to do with her in future chapters.


	17. Furnace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dennis has breakfast with Patricia.  
> Casey shows up for a few paragraphs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: Mentions of incestuous child molestation.

Dennis is up at the usual time the next morning (about half an hour before the sun) and Miss Patricia is already in the kitchen. She’s stirring the pot of oatmeal that will be left out for the tenants until noon. She makes bacon and eggs for Dennis. She buys those foods (in addition to what she makes him for dinner) specifically for him and makes a point of ensuring that he eats both meals before anyone else does. While he eats, she will usually have a cup of what she makes for the tenants which she will eat while standing by the stove. 

The whole thing still makes Dennis feel a bit uncomfortable. His job at the warehouse doesn’t pay much but since he doesn’t pay rent he could easily at least pay for his own food and the fact that she feeds him first sends a... message. It’s why the tenants whisper crude things about the two of them... things like what Crystal said that night before she stormed off. Of course, Dennis won’t be telling Miss Patricia any of this because he doesn’t want her to think that he’s ungrateful. Besides, she grew up in an environment where there were no Alphas so she was probably never taught about how traditionally it’s the dominant Alpha of the pack that eats first. 

“I would like to post the ad for the rooms on Thursday.” 

He can’t ignore the fact that she said ‘rooms’ and not ‘room.’ 

“It’ll be done by then but today I wanna’ focus on the furnace.” 

“Of course.” She stirs her oatmeal. “Have you heard anything from the little cat?” 

“No but i can always call her... I mean, if I get it runnin’ by the end’a the day.” 

“If she doesn’t intend to return, I would rather that you didn’t change her mind... are you honestly so loathed to part with her?” 

Dennis takes a deep breath through his nose. 

“You know that ain’t it.” 

She sighs. 

“Oh, yes, the boy.” She comes to sit at the end of the table opposite him. “Dennis, you are not that boys father, I doubt that his mother could pick the man out of a lineup, and if she were more discriminate about the company that she keeps, she wouldn’t find herself in such dire straits.” 

Dennis can’t think of anything to say because this is all true... most of what Miss Patricia says is true. Crystal had Hedwig when she was still in high school with a male Alpha to whom she didn’t belong. When she sees that he isn’t going to argue, she goes on. 

“And do you know why she’s so careless, Dennis?” 

Dennis almost says ‘because she’s a cat?’ but thinks better of it. 

“She doesn’t bother to be careful because she knows that she’ll always be able to find a decent man like you to bear the weight of her mistakes for her.” 

He wants to argue but she goes on before he can. 

“And I’m not disparaging you, you are simply doing what your nature compels you to do it’s just that in this case those instincts are unfortunately misplaced.” 

“You SAID that if I got it running today, you’d let them stay the winter.” 

She huffs. 

“And I will, I just think that if she doesn’t express an interest in returning, you should count that as a blessing.” She stands and walks back over to the pot on the stove to reduce the heat and stir it. “Does you’re new friend know anything about the situation?” 

“Only what he saw the other night... why would he need ta’ know?” 

“You don’t think that he might have something to say about you’re being so protective of another Omega and her bastard offspring?” 

“... I don’t think he’d mind” Dennis honestly doesn’t know if he would, the prospect hadn’t occurred to him. 

“Are you sure? I’ve heard that they can get quite possessive once they’ve bonded and you don’t live with him. It might seem suspicious to him that you’re so eager to keep another Omega near when you don’t mind him being elsewhere.” 

This honestly hadn’t occurred to Dennis. He chokes down the remainder of his food. 

“I should go get started.” In his haste, he almost forgets his manners but then he stops at the door. “Thank you.” 

“You’re very welcome, Pet.” 

When dinner time rolls around and the furnace still won’t turn on, she doesn’t gloat but she does make it clear that she’ll be holding him to their agreement. 

\------ 

Casey sometimes wishes that she were a Beta, then when she was FINALLY free of her uncle she would actually BE free instead of just being transferred into the custody of someone else. Hell, maybe if she’d been a Beta, John wouldn’t have ever... taken an interest in her. He often tells her that if she’d just be a ‘good girl’ he wouldn’t have to be so ‘strict’ with her. As if her inability to just lay back and enjoy the forced incest meant that there was something wrong with HER. He sometimes says it while she’s lying in bed beside him, her back to him, trying to cry as quietly as possible. 

Over the years, she’s made a few attempts to get help. She’s told guidance counselors and teachers but ultimately it winds up coming to nothing. Uncle John has mastered playing the put upon uncle overwhelmed with the task of caring for his problem child niece... he even cried once in a guidance counselors office. For some reason, his tears make people more inclined to believe him while her’s are always written off as manipulation or melodramatic teenage hysterics. She tries to run away but every time he catches her (or the cops catch her and drag her back to him) he makes her regret it more and more until she eventually stops trying. 

Her life becomes more of a pre-death; she goes through the motions and just waits for it to finally end... one way or another. She goes back and forth between wishing that her soulmates would just show up already and hoping that they never do, depending on the level of her spirits that day. Sometimes she dares to hope that her life with them will be a happy one and that they’ll have the means to remove her from her uncle’s clutches. Sometimes she’s sure that she doesn’t need them, that she will EVENTUALLY escape on her own into a life of freedom that she will not want to be hampered by their presence. Sometimes she resents them as her future jailers (reasoning that it will take men like John to defeat John.) 

As she gets older, his interest in her wanes but still he feels the need to mark his territory at least two or three times a month and now the act is always accompanied by aggression. She doesn't know if he resents her for not being a little girl anymore or for not being the willing sex slave that he'd spent her childhood trying to groom her into. During her senior year of high school, he seems to start falling apart. His drinking gets worse until her eventually loses his job, he falls behind on the rent and loses the apartment. It’s mostly only the coming winter that keeps her from making another run for it. Instead, she tells herself to just wait. She thinks that she means to wait for her 18th birthday but a small, deeply buried part of her feels like it’s waiting for something else.


	18. Coffee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A 'little cat' visits Barry at work.

Barry is toward the end of his barista shift when someone that he hadn’t ever expected to see again comes in. It’s that woman from the front lawn of the boarding house, the one with the kid who had clearly been no fan of Patricia. She’s looking far more composed now and, to Barry’s surprise, she seems to recognize him too. 

“Oh-my-god, hi! You’re a friend of Dennis’s, right?” 

“Uh... yeah. I don’t believe we been formally introduced.” 

She giggles and holds out her hand. 

“I’m Crystal and I promise I’m not a crazy bitch.” 

Barry laughs. 

“I’m Barry and I didn’t think ya’ were. I mean, under those circumstances, I wouldn’t have been much more composed... hows yer kid?” 

“He’s alright, he’s in school right now, thank god... when do you get off?” 

“In about fifteen minutes.” 

“Could we maybe... talk?” 

“Sure.” 

She waits at the back of the room while Barry finishes up. He brings her a free macchiato that she accepts with extreme gratitude. 

“What’s on yer mind, doll?” 

“I just wanted to...” She seems to be struggling for words. “Are you and Dennis an... item?” 

“Yeah, I’d say we’re a way’s into ‘item’ territory... why?” 

She picks up on his suspicions right away. 

“Oh, don’t worry. I’m not gonna’ lie, I’ve been barking up that tree since I first laid eyes on him but he’s never barked back. Guess I just wasn’t his type.” 

Barry doesn’t feel the need to tell her that Dennis has claimed to have been nearly exclusively attracted to women before he met him. 

“How long have ya known ‘im?” 

“Oh, just since we’ve been in the boarding house which was... maybe six months ago.” 

“You got my sympathies.” 

She laughs again. 

“But it’s good that Dennis finally has someone beside HER. I swear that I don’t have a problem with Betas but that one gets under my skin.” 

“Yeah, I kinda’ picked up on you and her not gettin’ along.” 

She laughs. 

“Well you’ve got your work cut out for you because she’s got Dennis wrapped around her bony, man-ish finger.” 

Barry feels the need to clarify here, for the benefit of the reader, that there is nothing ‘man-ish’ about Patricia. She’s androgynous like a lot of Betas but she definitely skews more toward the feminine end of that spectrum and even if she didn’t everything about her clearly indicates that she is not only a woman but a lady, thank-you-very-much. It just that, unfortunately, when a female Omega has a problem with a she-Beta the standard go-to is for her to talk about how the Beta is not a ‘real’ woman. Bary has always hated that and no matter how many times he and Patricia are at odds in the future (spoiler alert: it’ll happen a lot) he’ll never stoop that low. In this instance, he tries to just brush it aside because he doesn’t feel like getting into an argument with this near-stranger over one little remark... he’s also hoping to get some information out of her. 

“What’s the deal with them anyway?” 

“Oh, God, who knows.” 

“You seemed ta’ know the other night.” 

“Oh, that. I was just... talking shit... I mean, people say stuff but I never really bought it... because... I mean... LOOK at her, clearly, he can do better.” 

She gestures to Barry. 

“What people?” 

“Just, some of the other people at the boarding house. There are a lot of theories though, like, Nadine thinks that Dennis is her illegitimate kid. Like, back when she was a nun she got knocked up by a priest or something and they made her give the kid away and it grew up into Dennis but I doubt it because I’ve slept with a Beta before and they’re basically like men down there.” 

Barry hasn’t slept with a Beta but he did take a Beta Studies class as part of his prerequisites at school. There was a segment on Beta anatomy because that’s completely left out of the sex-ed classes in grade and high school. As the textbook explained it, Betas have ‘ambiguous genitalia’ which is a term that refers to a spectrum with standard male genitals at one end and standard female genitals at the other. Some Betas CAN conceive children but that’s, like, a one in a million thing and some have an enlarged clitoris that functions as a penis in every respect apart from there being no sperm in the ejaculate that it produces. Barry doesn’t say any of this because, again, he doesn’t feel like getting into an argument... and he doesn’t want to think too much about what’s between Patricia’s legs. 

“What do you think the situation is?” 

“Um... I don’t want you to think I mean this in a bad way but... I’m pretty sure Dennis is an ex-con.” 

Barry raises an eyebrow. 

“I’m not saying it’s a big deal, my dad did time more than once, but he’s just got that vibe about him and it would explain why he’s so grateful to her for that shitty job... it can be hard for them to find work after they get out.” 

Barry doubts that she knows that Dennis doesn’t make any money or that he’s afraid of cops and he’s not about to tell her but, factoring those things in, this makes a lot of sense. While he’s mulling this over, Crystal seems to get uncomfortable with the silence. 

“Anyway, I just wanted to ask if Dennis was, like, really pissed about how I acted the other night.” 

Barry shrugs. 

“I honestly don’t know but it seemed like he didn’t want her ta’ kick you out.” 

She seems relieved. 

“He’s a sweetheart, you wouldn’t guess it by how he never smiles but he is.” 

She’s suddenly grows self-conscious. 

“It’s not that I don’t have anywhere else to go, I’ve got friends, it’s just that most of them don’t like me bringing Hedwig around.” 

Again, Barry has to bite his tongue. What kind of friends will let a woman stay with them but not let her bring her kid with? A mother and her child are a package deal, aren’t they? 

“Having a kid was probably what got me on her shit list, you know, since she can’t have any. You know how the ones that think they’re women can get.” 

Barry must look uncomfortable because she backpedals... kind of. 

“I was polite at first, I played along but I’m not going to let some man in a dress talk shit to me and ignore the fact that they’re a fucking MAN in an ugly fucking dress.” 

If Barry bites his tongue any harder it’s going to snap off, so he decides that he had better end the conversation. 

“Sorry, it’s been... great but I got somewhere ta’ be.” 

“Oh, ok. Well let me give you my number, we can hang out some time.” 

Barry lets her write it down on a scrap of paper from her purse and give it to him but he doubts that he’ll use it. He’s not sure he wants to get close with someone who makes him feel compelled to defend Patricia. Before they part, she grabs his arm. 

“Um, one more thing...” Her voice drops to a whisper, necessitating him leaning in close. “I got food poisoning three times since I started staying there... I’d never had it before and when I started living off of whatever prepackaged stuff I could keep in my room, it didn’t happen again.” 

She looks Barry in the eyes meaningfully and then walks away.


	19. Phantom Limb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patricia goes to confession.

Father Bringam is technically retired, he has seemed to Patricia to be on the brink of death for years now, but he still gives communion and takes confessions from the deposed Sisters of the Inner Sanctum. Back when they’d first been stripped of their titles and cast out into the secular world, he’d go to them but since he’s got on in years he doesn’t have the stamina for that. The (former) Sisters who are able to go to see him once a week in the clergy house off the back of the church where he lives with the younger priest who gives mass there. Since many of the Mother Superior’s inner circle had been no spring chickens back when they’d been excommunicated, some are no more fit for travel than the Father and so the younger priest visits them in the church-run indigent home where they’re kept. To facilitate confessions, Father Bringam has had a privacy screen put up in his room the bed to which he’s bound on one side and a chair on the other. That is where Patricia sits now. 

“Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been a week since my last confession.” 

“And what is the nature of your sins my child?” 

Patricia has almost begun to think that confession is unnecessary, it’s been so long since her’s has changed. 

“I find myself plagued with impure thoughts. Lustful thoughts, violent fantasies... contemplations of suicide. My prayers are hollow as is that place in me that was once occupied by the holy spirit.” 

Of course, he seizes upon the most obvious thing... men are so predictable. 

“When did you last contemplate suicide?” 

“I dreamt of... HIM last night and awoke feeling immeasurable despair.” The Father knows what ‘HIM’ she is referring to. He’s one of the few living people who know who she used to be. 

“We’re coming up on the anniversary of his death, aren’t we?” 

“It’s tomorrow... around this same time every year I feel grief for HIM again like an ache in a phantom limb. Prayer no longer brings any relief.” 

“But you’ve endured this before and you will again, we all have our crosses to bear, Patricia, and we both that you’re strong enough. You must simply bear in mind that he was an agent of the Devil and that any feelings you had for him were illusory as are their lingering echoes. The Devil can only gain purchase in you if you allow it and so you must not allow it. Do you understand.” 

She resists the compulsion to sigh. 

“Yes, Father.” 

“When the darkness comes you must be all the more ardent in turning your thoughts to God, though you feel he may have turned from you I promise that if you only keep the faith his light will shine on you once more.” 

“...yes, Father.” 

When he speaks again his tone is just barely altered but clearly indicated that he is no longer speaking as a priest. 

“How have you been otherwise, my dear.” 

“Oh, more of the same... treading water.” 

“And how is your young man?” 

She takes a deep breath. 

“Lately he’s become... attached.” He does not seem to notice the tension in her voice and replies with a joviality that makes her grit her teeth. 

“Good! But of course, I’m sure you’ll remind him that even bonds dictated by nature must be sanctioned by the Lord Our Father before they are consummated.” 

“Indeed I will.” She won't... on some level, he HAS to know that she won't. Dennis got baptized back when he was still in the institution but Patricia is fairly certain that he’d only done that because he thought that it would please her. He hasn’t been to mass a single time as a free man and she can’t bring herself to chide him for it... mostly because she doesn’t care. She hears the father getting up out of bed, he emerges from around the screen shortly after. Despite the informal setting, he has still bothered to dress in his black uniform and collar. She appreciates that. He only makes it to the end of the bed, wheezing, before he has to sit down but they can see eachother now. 

“You know, Father Burk has told me that Sister Margo asks after you every time he visits.” 

She KNEW that it was only a matter of time before this came up. She tries to distract him. 

“How do you call him that with a straight face... he looks less like a priest and more like a little boy in a costume.” 

That gets a laugh out of him that ends in a hacking cough. His lungs have gone bad, he’s slowly suffocating inside his own body, and every time Patricia comes here she thinks about putting a pillow over his face to end his suffering. She won't though. 

“Now, now, you were young once too and back then you thought that you knew everything.” 

“Yes, and now I know that I do.” 

Another laugh, this time followed by a longer fit of coughing. She lets her brow furrow in concern. 

“You should lie back down.” 

“No.” He takes a few deep breaths and then cuts to the chase, much to her disappointment. “Patricia, it’s been two months since you’ve been to see Sister Margo and she’s been asking after you.” 

“Me or Rosemary? That’s what she called me throughout the duration of our last visit.” 

“You, dear.” He sighs. “Her mental clarity fluctuates but apparently when she’s lucid she asks after you... Is that why you’ve stopped going? Because she didn’t seem to know you anymore?” 

That’s PART of it but she doesn’t feel like explaining all that to him. 

“No, I’ve simply been preoccupied... the furnace is shot and I’ve recently lost multiple tenants.” 

He seems to know that this is another attempted deflection but doesn’t confront her directly about it. When he says her name, it’s in a tone of paternal disapproval. 

“Patricia... she may very well be on her way Home and you have a moral obligation as her Daughter to be there for her.” 

Sister Margo was Patricia’s Mother (her mentor) at the convent. She was the one who named her Patricia and taught her the path to the Inner Sanctum. Then, after the ex-communication, her brain had begun to melt. The doctors all say that her genetic predisposition to dementia would have ensured that she’d gotten it regardless but Patricia knows better. Her mother had been sharp as a tack while living in the convent... as if the place itself were sustaining her. The father lays an unwelcome hand on top of Patricia’s own hands which are folded neatly in her lap. 

“You know, Patricia, she has always loved you fiercely though she may have lacked the tools to show it. You weren’t her only Daughter but you were her favorite.” 

Patricia pulls away from the man and stands. 

“I’ll go. I honestly just haven’t had the time but I should be able to at some point in the coming week.” 

He rises with great difficulty, they are the same height, and puts a hand on her upper arm. 

“You’ve always been a good girl, Patricia... Don’t let the darkness within you smother the light.” 

At the door, he gives her a kiss on the cheek. She waits until she out of his sight to wipe it away. That evening over dinner she asks Dennis if he’s free to give her a ride to the retirement home that next day. He knows where it is because he’s brought her there before. He doesn’t like her taking the train. He says that he can and then after a long pause asks if she’s alright. She says that she is and he doesn’t pry... bless him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case anyone was wondering, Patricia is Catholic despite being English because in this universe the pack dynamic allowed Henry VII to just have more than one wife so it was never necessary for him to divorce Catherine of Aragon and thus not necessary for him to found the church of England.


	20. Braid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patricia goes to see her Mother and then goes somewhere else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: SELF HARM.

When Patricia first arrived to visit Sister Margo, she’d been greeted with a hug which had been a grim portent of things to come. To put this into context, once roughly a month after Patricia had arrived in the states, her Mother had found a book on Taoism in her room, beaten her with a cane, and then made her sleep on the floor every night for the following month. Patricia doesn’t recall seeing her smile a single time at the convent but she smiles all through their visit. She sincerely wants to know how Patricia is and is proud of how well she’s managing, not that she’s surprised because HER Daughter has always been so VERY clever and resourceful. She brags about Patricia to the nurse that lingers in the room culminating in her cooing over how blessed she is to have such a lovely Daughter while combing her fingers through Patricia’s hair and then braiding it. 

Patricia emerges into the over-bright daylight in the parking lot feeling as though she’s been in the building for days even though it’s been less than an hour. She feels a little of the weight lift off of her chest when she sees Dennis waiting for her in his truck, reading a weathered paperback that is likely instructional in nature (he doesn’t care for fiction or for factual information that he cannot directly apply.) Before she reached the vehicle he gets out to open the passenger side door for her, he glances at her braided hair but doesn’t comment on it... bless him. He asks how it went and she says ‘as well as can be expected’ which he does not question... bless him. During the ride, she unbraids her hair, combing it out with her fingers, and reflects on her Mother. 

One must not assume that because the woman was strict, she was not caring. In fact, the priest’s revelation about her Mother’s fierce love had come as no surprise to her. After all, when her Mother had risen to the rank of Mother Superior, she had taken Patricia as far up with her as she could without invoking accusations of nepotism. They HAD happened, of course, but they hadn’t been taken seriously by anyone who mattered. Sister Margo had groomed Patricia more carefully, held her close longer, than any of her other Daughters and that had all proven her love. 

Sister Margo had been the only Mother that Patricia had ever known and Patricia had loved her accordingly. She’d never said it but she hadn’t needed to, she’d proven it with her obedience and devotion. She’d have followed that woman to the ends of the Earth... the problem was that that woman was gone now... and it was her fault. After all, wasn’t it she who had let that little snake slither into their midst? Wasn’t it she that had failed to convince her to stay? And her leaving had sewn the seeds of the order’s destruction... hadn’t it? 

Worst of all had been the fact that, when Patricia had come under suspicion, Sister Margo had defended her. There had been a faction within the convent that had wanted to sacrifice Patricia, to claim that they had had no knowledge of the treatment that Patricia’s charge had received and that what she had done had certainly not been standard practice among their Order. Sister Margo had refused to even consider it, she’d insisted that HER Daughter had done nothing wrong and adhered to their tenants to the letter. They had all taken the same vows, utilized the same methods, they were a family, they would sink or swim together... and then they’d sank and it had been Patricia’s fault. She hadn’t been any harder on the girl than her Mother had been on her but... that wasn’t the reason she’d ultimately left... was it, Patricia? 

You could have made her stay and you wouldn’t have even had to lie. Now your mother is a prattling shell of the untouchable, iron-willed woman that she once was and you’re Sisters lives have been ruined and it’s ALL your FAULT... isn’t it... Violet? 

\------ 

Dennis doesn’t like taking Miss Patricia to the retirement home. He understands why she thinks she needs to go there but he hates how upset she always gets after. While she undoes the braid and combs her hair out with her fingers, she sobs quietly which isn’t unusual. What is unusual is that it eventually turns into gasping. He pulls over to the side of the road and tries to get her attention verbally repeatedly. When she keeps her eyes closed and her arms wrapped around her and just keeps gasping, he reaches over and touches her shoulder. 

She starts and pulls away in a way that makes him feel bad for touching her in the first place. She looks at him for a second as if she doesn’t know him but then her gaze clears. 

“I’m sorry, I was just... thinking.” 

“Ok... uh, you gonna’ be alright if I start drivin’ again?” 

“... when did you stop?” 

He restarts the truck and pulls back on to the road. He had no idea what to say but he feels like he should say something. 

“I don’t... need ta’ go ta’ Barrys fer dinner tonight.” 

She looks confused. 

“I hadn’t planned on making you anything.” 

“That’s alright... just... if yer not feelin’ well...” 

“I’m FEELING fine.” 

“You... you were just...” 

He doesn’t want to say ‘hyperventilating’ because she’ll guess that that’s a term Dr. Fletcher taught him. He also knows what had just been happening because it happens to him sometimes too. It was hard for him to accept the fact that she could have panic attacks the way that he did because she seems (she IS) so much stronger than him. He also hadn’t wanted to admit it because that would make him feel like he had to do something about it and he has NO idea what to do about it. The valium is technically for things like that but he knows that she won’t take any, she doesn’t even take aspirin but he doubts that plain tea will do anything for a panic attack. 

“It’s OVER now, Pet, no sense in dwelling on it.” 

She’s right... he should just keep his mouth shut. 

“I just don’t like leavin’ you alone when yer... upset.” 

“Why would I be upset?” 

He doesn’t know what to say... he never knows what to say and he sometimes gets the feeling that she counts on that. When they get back into the house, he keeps scrambling in his mind for excuses to stay with her... windows. 

“I should stay in and shrink wrap the windows tonight anyway. It’s just gonna’ keep gettin’ colder.” 

“It can wait.” The fact that she thinks so is concerning enough but she also starts toward her room as soon as she gets in the door. “I need to lie down.” 

“Ain’t no reason I can’t do it while yer liein’ down.” 

“Dennis.” Her eyes flash. Before she can say anything else, Nadine comes down the stairs seemingly one her way to the kitchen. “There will no evening meal.” 

“I’ll manage.” The omega says with the nervous smile that seems to be her default around Miss Patricia. She also always makes a point of giving Miss Patricia a generic compliment. “Ya’ look real nice tonight.” 

She waits to see if there will be a response and when it’s clear that there won’t be, she continues into the kitchen. Patricia fixes Dennis with a wary look. 

“I’ll be in my room. It doesn’t matter if you stay or go.” She disappears up the stairs like a shadow creeping back at the approach of the sun and he wants to follow her, to pursue the matter further, but he knows better. Should he go the Barry’s though? He knows she’ll likely not be back down again tonight but still... what if... what if she NEEDS him? His phone vibrates, it’s Barry. 

[Just off work, when u gonna be by?] 

\------ 

Alone in her room, Patricia almost succumbs to panic again but then she reminds herself that hysterics are a form of vanity. What would her Mother (the one who is now, for all intents and purposes, dead) say if she saw her carrying on? ‘You are not an Omega, girl, there’s no big strong Alpha here to save you.’ Needing to quiet her mind, she kneels down beside her bed and pulls out a wooden box the size and dimensions of a suitcase. Inside, there is an array of tools to aid in meditation; she selects a little cross made of cast iron. 

Many of the tenants keep hot plates in the rooms because they’d rather not use the kitchen but Patricia keeps one for a different reason. She turns it on and sets the cross on it and then undresses. Her body is covered in elaborately patterned markings, each commemorating a journey to the Inner Sanctum. Instinct tells her when the iron is hot enough, she picks it up with a set on tongs, inhales, exhales, and then places it against her inner thigh, over a similarly shaped scar that has long since healed. She inhales, she exhales, she lets the pain empty her mind. 

The space left when conscious thought recedes is the Inner Sanctum. In better days, the Holy Spirit would come to fill that emptiness, granting her ecstasy, showing her the face of God but now there is only the emptiness. She lets herself be absorbed into it and for a brief, peaceful while ceases to exist.


	21. Whistle Blower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief excerpt from the perspective of the whistleblower that got the convent shut down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, this character is Dr. Ellie Staple. It's mostly because there's going to be stuff between her and Patricia and I find Sarah Paulson and Tilda Swinton (who is my fantasy casting for Patricia) very attractive.

Her correspondence with the convent began over a year before she even met any of them. When she’d sufficiently persuaded them that her interest was genuine, she was given a date and time to meet with a ‘convent representative’ in a sort of outbuilding near the convent that looked like a classroom on the inside. The ‘representative’ is an elderly woman with a Russian accent whom she assumes is a nun based on her manner of dress. She issues her a series of tests, one on basic Latin, one on the scriptures, and one on the history of the order. Ellie had had to educate herself in these things since her parents couldn’t afford catholic school and wouldn’t have sent her there even if they could. 

There were words for people like her family; atheist, secularist... nihilist. God wasn’t necessarily banned from their household but he certainly didn’t have a place there. She was the only beta child of a traditional pack meaning that it was made up of an Alpha and multiple Omegas, three to be specific. Her mother had had a soul bond with more than one Alpha but her father had challenged him to a fight and won. Her mother had given her father one Alpha boy, a pair of Omega twins (one male and one female), and her. 

From the earliest onset of puberty, she was told that she should be grateful that she could pass for an Omega and was heavily encouraged to do so. Her mother explained to her once that she probably had no hope of marrying an Alpha but that the wealthy ones sometimes kept Betas as mistresses (no chance of producing any illegitimate children that way) but if she wanted to land that sort of position she had to PASS. She thinks that she developed her interest in joining the clergy as a sort of rebellion against her mother. As far as she could find, the church was the one institution in the western world that saw Betas as having innate value and to such an extent that it created a place for them within itself. She saw becoming a nun as the only way that she could ever be acknowledged and honored as a Beta, have an identity as what she was instead of as just an Omega that couldn’t get pregnant. 

The first convent she’d enrolled in had been, honestly, too easy to get into and she found life there disappointingly mundane. That was why, even after two years there, she had yet to rise above the rank of novice. She didn’t want to take her vows there and resign herself to mundanity. Eventually, through research, she found what she thought was the answer to her prayers. The Blessed Sisterhood of the Inner Sanctum, which lay in Philidelphia, was said to be one of the last convents in the continental United States that still practiced in the old way, adhering to traditions going all the way back to the dark ages. 

She asked some of the senior nuns at her current convent if they’d heard of the place and their response made her sure that the place was for her. They were very particular about who they let in and even once she was accepted there would be a lengthy trial period during which she would be thoroughly vetted. They didn’t have the authority to simply transfer her there but, if she would like, she could write them a letter and wait to be contacted. She wrote them one letter and then another and then another and then another. After six months of writing, she received a terse reply explaining that (do to the convents limited resources) she would need to relocate to Philidelphia in order to be considered. 

They had probably expected that to be it and if she were less determined it would have been. Instead, she left the convent she was currently with and relocated to another city with nothing but the promise of possibly being seriously considered. When she got into contact with them again, informing them of her relocation, they began to demand a long series of documents. She had to provide a birth certificated, proof of residency, medical documentation of the fact that she was a beta, and that she did not menstruate. A tiny percentage of betas possess enough of the internal, reproductive plumbing necessary to menstruate, in the eyes of the church these are not true betas, and traditionally only TRUE betas were considered fit to be nuns. 

By the time she was allowed to take the tests, she’d been in the city another six months, working a night shift cashiering job and renting a room that was barely livable. A week after taking the tests she receives a brief phone call to set up a phone interview with ‘Sister Patricia.’ She’s so nervous on the night that she’s scheduled to receive that call that she jumps when her phone rings. Then, she hears Patricia’s voice for the first time. Since she’d for some reason been expecting to be interviewed by the same woman who gave her the tests, she’s startled by the contrast between the voice on the phone and that woman’s harsh, guttural Russian accent. 

The voice on the phone is gentle and cultured, it informs her that it’s owner is one of the Mother Superior’s Prior Generals (for the uninitiated; the Prior Generals are the lowest ranking authority figures in a convent but Ellie will eventually learn that in addition to this, Patricia is the lowest ranking member of the Mother Superior’s inner circle which is comprised of only six women) and that now that her general knowledge has been confirmed they can begin the process of determining if Ellie is deserving of an audience with the Mother Superior. Ellie thanks her because that’s all that she can think to say. The interview is comprised of the sort of stock questions that probably could have been answered by a read through all of the documents she’s already provided them with. It begins to feel as though they’re simply seeing how many hoops they can get her to jump through but any frustration Ellie may feel about that is smothered by that voice. The question ‘can you come in tomorrow?’ hit’s her like a splash of cold water. 

“To... meet with the Mother Superior?” 

“No, dear, to meet with me? This is a two-stage process, the second stage of which is an in-person interview. If you pass muster there, you get an audience with Mother Superior, and if that goes well then I shall become your Mother.” 

Ellie knows that the woman on the phone means that she will be her mentor if she’s accepted into the order but for some reason, the term makes her blush. 

(Looking back on the experience, she thinks that her judgment was clouded from the start by her intense attraction to Sister Patricia which was only strengthened by the fact that she was in denial about it.) 

She returns to the outbuilding where she’d taken the tests to find Sister Patricia waiting for her. It might be hard later on for others to understand her infatuation because Patricia was not what most would consider beautiful. She was a tall, angular, bony thing with an aquiline nose, small eyes, and thin lips but... You have to see her in person to really get it. She seemed more than human... like a fey creature. Her skin was pearlescent white and her hair was a platinum blonde curtain that hung nearly to her waist. She had the bearing of a queen and a smile like the edge of a blade.


	22. Pizza

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry and Dennis have dinner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of poorly simulated rape.

Dennis winds up canceling on Barry. Miss Patricia doesn’t come out of her room until very late that night, from in his room, he hears the faint creak of her coming down the stairs and considers going out to talk to her but... what would he say? The next morning at breakfast she looks a little worn around the eyes like she hasn’t slept, but Dennis knows better than to ask about it. She thanks him for wrapping the windows and tells him that they have some perspective tenants and that she will need him there to help her interview them on Friday. In tenant interviews, Dennis usually “helps” by standing behind her and looking menacing. There are a depressing number of people who won’t take a she-Beta seriously unless she’s backed by an Alpha. 

He doesn’t have work that day so he spends the morning winterizing the house. The furnace had started surprisingly easily the day after his initial attempt but he turns it off and gives it a thorough cleaning. Deciding that it’s best not to risk a fire, he makes sure that all the ducts and vents are clear. He finds a dead rat and where there are dead rats, there are usually also live ones. He goes to the hardware store for traps (he doesn’t use poison because scattering poison around your home is a bad idea.) 

On his way to the hardware store, he realizes that he’s going to be passing the coffee shop where Barry works. Though the thought of it panics Dennis just a little, Barry would probably like it if he went in and he does owe him for last night, doesn't he? He sits in the parking lot of the strip mall for a good fifteen minutes before deciding no... no, he shouldn't distract Barry while he's working. He feels the knot in his stomach loosens at his decision not to go in while the guilt he's felt since canceling last night slightly increases. He'll be seeing Barry later, though. When he'd canceled last night he'd agreed to the following night... Apparently, there's something that Barry believes they need to discuss. 

He comes home to find Miss Patricia in the basement, attending to the laundry. The tenants are permitted to use the washer and dryer provided that they ensure it’s open on the day that she washes her clothing and his. There’s something awkwardly intimate, to Dennis, about having someone else wash his clothes. Even as a child, he’d more often than not been faced with either having to do his own laundry or have no clean clothes to wear. His mother would get... very upset sometimes and take to her bed for a week or more. 

They briefly acknowledge eachother but then both go about their business. Dennis thinks that he feels best at these times when they’re together but her focus isn’t directly ON him. He knows that there aren’t many people that she’s willing to let her guard down around... maybe it’s only him. He doesn’t want to spoil it by telling her that he won’t be here for dinner. He knows that she doesn’t like Barry even though she hasn’t directly said it. Despite the fact that most people seem to like Barry, this doesn’t surprise Dennis because she doesn’t like almost anyone. 

Until now it hasn't bothered him that Miss Patricia is... socially discerning because so is he. Her ever-present suspicion also leads her to be right about people a lot and it’s helpful to have someone who’s so often right on his side. He wholeheartedly believes that she is on his side. She gets him in a way that no one ever has, not even his psychiatrist. Sure, Dr. Fletcher can ‘empathize’ but only in the way that someone who can’t REALLY imagine how it feels can. 

He told Miss Patricia once, back in the asylum, about how he’d LOVED his mother but also hated and feared her and she’d told him about her husband. When she’d been very young, she’d been married to a man who had been truly vile to her but she’d been willing to die for him... had all but sold her soul for him. When he’d died, she said, she’d felt profoundly relieved and completely miserable both at the same time. She’d looked frail and vulnerable while talking about it and he’d wanted to hold her but had been shackled to the table between them. It was probably a good thing, she doesn’t like to be touched. He understands that too and appreciates how little she touches him. 

He’s almost tempted to cancel again but knows that he’d feel bad if he did. He also doesn’t like being away from Barry too long. It’s a physical craving, like hunger or thirst, that he assumes must have something to do with their soul bond. Besides, he knows that if Miss Patricia wanted him to stay, that’s what he’d wind up doing. She goes up to her room a while before he leaves, he hopes that she’s going up there to lie down. 

Barry greets him at the door with the usual enthusiasm. They kiss and the only thing that keeps Dennis form escalating things (he knows that Barry would have no objections) is his still lingering uncertainty about what exactly that would entail. He’s grateful that Barry is so willing to take the lead when it comes to things like that because he’s still out of his depth in that area. It would probably help if he’d ever thought about it (being with a man) before but he hadn’t, it hadn’t even occurred to him as a possibility, and even now that it has his mind doesn’t seem to naturally wander in that direction. This is partly because fantasies about women (...girls) became a deeply embedded habit a long time ago. 

Dr. Fletcher has explained it to him that these are called recurring intrusive thoughts, a part of his OCD. That’s not what they are all the time but when they keep replaying in his head even when he doesn’t want them to, as background noise to everything else to such an extent that it sometimes sends him into a sort of self-loathing panic... That doesn’t happen around Barry though. When they’re together it’s blessedly easy for Dennis to stay present in the moment. It’s what makes him sure that they’re meant to be together even when everything else in him says that they shouldn’t be and points out all the obstacles in the way of that happening. 

“Was somethin’... burning in here?” 

Barry looks embarrassed. 

“Yeah, I thought I’d make dinner but that didn’t work out so good. Takeout pizza ok?” 

“Sure.” 

Dennis supposes that it SHOULD bother him that his Omega isn’t much for domestic tasks but it just... doesn’t. Besides, maybe he can do those things for Barry. He’d often had to feed himself as a child because his mother could so rarely be bothered but that hadn’t lead to him learning anything about cooking beyond heating things up out of a can or following the instructions on the back of a box but he can learn more and he can clean and organize and fix things. Barry’s probably going to wind up making more money than him if his plans for the future work out (maybe he does even now) and Dennis intends to find some way of compensating for that. All this, though, assumes that they’ll eventually wind up living together... it seems impossible now but it NEEDS to happen. Dennis can’t bear to contemplate any other future. 

“Was everything ok last night?” 

For a mad moment, Dennis thinks about telling Barry exactly what had happened. Barry probably can’t help the situation but there’s something about the Omega that makes Dennis want to unburden himself to him. He almost does but then it occurs to him that Miss Patricia wouldn’t want him to. 

“Yeah, just some stuff I’d been putin’ off that I needed ta’ get done around the house before it got too cold.” 

Barry accepts this (why shouldn’t he? It’s MOSTLY true) and they go into the sitting room from the last time Dennis was here. It isn’t alien anymore because there alone there now, like they usually are. Dennis supposes that the presence of the people that Barry lives with is something he’ll eventually have to get used to. The words keep coming back to him ‘...life around here...” Surely, Barry doesn’t mean for him to eventually move here... even if Mr. Orwell would allow it, he just... couldn’t. 

They settle in to watch that series that Barry and Jade had been talking about because Barry at some point decided that Dennis is going to be with them when they go to see the film. Dennis doesn’t remember agreeing to this but it’s being treated as a given that it’s going to happen. This will be the case with a lot of social arrangements in the future. The actress playing Violet in the series is... SO lovely. Barry says that she was one of the good things about the series and went on after this to have a prolific career as a “scream queen.” 

She is almost enough to distract Dennis from the fact that from the very first episode the series makes very little sense (Omegas can’t become novices and novices aren’t allowed to dress like that) and most of the other actors in it are far from convincing. It comes to a scene after the girl has been kidnapped. In the series, she and ‘the Beast’ meet briefly a few days before she is kidnapped and have a conversation that causes him to decide to kidnap her. Barry says that, based on what he’s read about the ‘true story,’ this conversation never happened. In the scene in question, the Beast is... possibly raping Violet during some sort of ritual in an abandoned church. 

It’s hard to tell if a rape is occurring because of how it’s shot, he guesses because they had to be able to put it on television. The way the girl reacts is similar to how the women in the pornographic films Dennis watches react to being ‘raped’ except that she’s a better actress than any of them. Dennis starts to feel... uncomfortable... flushed and tense and... The doorbell rings and Barry pauses the tv to go get the pizza. Dennis waits a moment, taking a few deep breaths and mentally going through each individual step of changing the oil in his truck, before rising to join Barry in the kitchen. 

Barry smiles when he enters as if his arrival there is a pleasant surprise. After they’ve gotten their food, Barry goes to leave the kitchen but pauses at the door, noting Dennis’s hesitancy. It’s not that he DOESN’T want to finish watching that scene... He’d just be more comfortable doing so alone in the dark in his room... with the sound off or maybe with headphones on... and the door locked. Sometimes Dennis can’t help but be a little bitter over his... sexual fixation being considered deviant when there’s so much in pop culture that seems to encourage it. 

“You said that we needed ta’ talk about somethin?” 

Dennis had half forgotten that Barry had said that until just now and it seems as though Barry had as well. 

“Oh... yeah.” 

The Omega comes back over to the kitchen island and set his plate down, suddenly looking a little nervous. 

“Well... it ain’t just one thing.” 

Dennis must look concerned. 

“Ya’ didn’t do anything wrong. There’s just some stuff I’ve been wonderin’.” 

Barry seems hesitant to go on and Dennis isn’t sure he wants him to but the only way of avoiding it would be to go back to watching THAT scene. 

“Like what?” 

\------ 

For one of the few times in his life, Barry is momentarily at a loss for words. It’s not that he can’t think of anything to say but rather that there are SO many things he feels need to be said (questions he feels should be asked) that he doesn’t know where to start. He’s also pretty sure he shouldn’t bring up Crystal which is going to make approaching certain topics difficult to do. He thinks of what he believes is a safe point of entry. 

“Well, first off, how did you wind up livin’ with Patricia? I mean, I’m guessin’ she didn’t put out a job listing fer an unpaid, live-in maintenance man.” 

Dennis bristles just a little but otherwise doesn’t take offense. 

“I... I knew her a while before she even owned that house... back when she was still livin’ in the convent.” 

“How’d you meet?” 

Dennis’s expression is thoughtful and mildly pained. 

“When I was younger I got sent ta’ her fer... counseling.” 

“What kind of counseling?” 

Dennis scratches the back of his neck. Suddenly he seems very interested in everything in the room that isn’t Barry. 

“I had some... some... problems back when I was a teenager... some...” 

From his hesitance to elaborate and the fact that he got ‘counseling’ for them, Barry guesses he’s talking about psychological problems. 

“...and they sent you to a NUN for that?” 

“Not just her, I had... I have a doctor that I see... every two weeks.” 

The way Dennis says all this like he’s admitting to having an incurable venereal disease, kind of breaks Barry’s heart. 

“Goin’ ta’ therapy isn’t a big deal... you’re not even the only person I know who does.” 

If this does anything to put Dennis at ease, it doesn’t show. Barry decides that it would be best to push past it. 

“So you met Patricia when you were a teenager and then...?” 

“...after they shut down the convent they gave each’a the women they kicked out a chunk’a money. Patricia used hers ta’ buy the boarding house. I was havin’ trouble findin’ work around then and... she needed me.” 

It hadn’t taken long after they’d started getting to know eachother for Barry to pick up on the fact that feeling needed is very important to Dennis. Part of him wants to press on, there are still plenty of questions sitting heavy in the back of his mind, but this is all clearly causing Dennis a lot of anxiety. Barry walks over and kisses him, eliciting a look of mild surprise that’s kind of adorable. 

“I hope she knows how lucky she is to have you.”


	23. A Smell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Casey and John have dinner.  
> Dennis goes to therapy.

Casey has mixed feelings about her and John’s current temporary living arrangement. On one hand, she’s subjected daily to John and his friend Bill (who goes by ‘Buck’ for reasons that Casey never intends to ask about) talking constantly about their glory days and Buck’s wife’s little remarks to her about how she’d be SO pretty if she just smiled more/wore a little makeup/curled her hair/didn’t dress like that/etc. On the other hand, she’s staying in the upstairs bedroom of their daughter Melody (who is away at college) and John is sleeping on the couch in Buck’s mancave which is all the way downstairs in the basement and so far he hasn’t been bold enough to risk creeping upstairs to ‘visit’ her during the night. The food here is also almost good enough to be worth listening to the dinner conversation. 

“It’ll be part-time at first but with my recommendation, it’s a sure thing, and then once we get rid of the other guy we can increase your hours.” 

John lost his job shortly after losing the apartment but Buck has promised him a position in the warehouse where he works as an area manager. 

“If they need someone full time why don’t they just give the other guy more hours?” 

Buck tisks. 

“That’s what Lionel wants but Dennis says he’s too busy.” 

“Doing what?” 

John laughs. 

“I don’t know, crazy shit.” 

“He’s a nut job?” 

“His file says he’s disabled and there’s nothing physically wrong with him so...” Buck traces a circle in the air with his finger beside his head. “He goes around wiping off doorknobs... Id’ be willing to bet he just doesn’t want to go full time because he’s afraid to use a public bathroom and doesn’t’ think he could hold it that long.” 

Both men laugh. 

“And on top of that he somehow has the nerve to be stuck up; barely talks to anyone unless it’s to tell then they’re doing something wrong. So, I figure we get you in there, get him to train you then I mention to HR that you’re qualified and willing to work full time and...” Buck snaps his fingers. “No more psycho.” 

“Could we PLEASE talk about something other than work.” Joe-Anne (Buck’s wife) finally speaks. “Casey, honey, have you applied to any colleges?” 

Before Casey can open her mouth, John opens his. 

“Casey-bear isn’t the academic type after she graduates I’m gonna’ put her to work. Bout time she pulled her own weight.” He plays it off like he’s joking with her and she wants to put her fork through his eye. Casey had wanted to work while she was in high school but he hadn’t let her, nor had he let her learn to drive. This had all been an obvious effort on his part to make it harder to for her to run away but was misinterpreted by most people as his being overprotective and spoiling her. It’s also the reason that she hasn’t made her final escape yet... because she honestly doesn’t know how she’s going to survive after she does. 

Joe-Anne pats Casey’s arms and tells her that college isn’t for everyone, she knows plenty of very intelligent people who didn’t bother with higher education. The conversation turns to Melody, who got into college on a track scholarship, and how well she’s doing and what a bright and ambitious young lady she is. Casey spreads her mashed potatoes out over her plate by flattening them with her fork and tries once again to sort out exactly when and how she’ll be leaving and what she’ll do to avoid homelessness when she does. It feels huge and borderline impossible like she’s planning to sail around the world. After dinner, she helps Joe-Anne with the dishes and then says that she doesn’t feel well and goes upstairs to lie down. 

\------- 

Dennis is in Dr. Fletcher’s office again, like he is every two weeks. It had been twice a week (Monday and Friday) when he’d first been let our but after a year or so the doctor had thought that it’d be safe to cut back. Eventually, he might get down to as little as once a month or even once every two months. He wants that to happen because he knows that it’ll mean he’s improved but also doesn’t want it to happen because... he’ll miss her. He knows he’s not supposed to say things like that to her though. She’s supposed to maintain a professional distance and she does because she’s a good psychiatrist. 

“There’s this new guy at work that I... hate.” 

She looks a little concerned. 

“And why do you suppose that is?” 

“I don’t know... I mean... he’s too... forward.” 

“Forward?” 

“He’s loud... talks too much, asks too many personal questions... poor sense’a personal space.” 

“And you feel that you ‘hate’ him because of that?” 

Dennis thinks for a moment. IS that the reason? 

“No. I don’t like those kinds’a people but I don’t hate them... it’s just...” 

As usual when he gets lost, she tries to help him. 

“You said he was new?” 

Dennis nods. 

“Why was he hired?” 

“They need a second part-timer to cover the hours I can’t take.” 

“Can’t?” 

He knows where this is headed, this topic comes up a lot. He tells himself not to get angry, she means well. 

“You know why I can’t.” 

She looks at him for what feels like a long time... He thinks maybe she looks... disappointed? 

“How are things going with Barry?” 

Despite his confusion over why she’s suddenly bringing that up, he feels the corner of his mouth twitch upward and his face gets a little warm. 

“It’s good... really good, I think.” 

She smiles. 

“That’s wonderful Dennis. Have any of those anxieties you’d been talking about been resolved?” 

“I told him about you... but just about how I see you twice a week... not about... why.” 

“And he responded positively?” 

“He said it wasn’t a big deal.” 

“Well, going to therapy is no longer the sort of thing that most people consider a red flag in a romantic partner.” 

Dennis thinks that, while that might be true, he’s eventually going to have to tell Barry EVERYTHING... isn’t he? 

“What’s this got ta’ do with John Cooke?” 

She looks puzzled. 

“The new man at work... the one I hate.” 

For a while she seems to be thinking. 

“Well, Dennis, it seems that you’re growing closer to Barry and in the past, you’ve expressed anxiety over your inability to be a provider, in the financial sense, that any relationship you had with an Omega would be doomed to fail because you couldn’t earn enough money to support yourself and another person.” 

Dennis can’t meet her eyes, his voice is almost a whisper. 

“Can’t even support myself.” 

She sighs. 

“While I don’t agree that the amount of money that you earn has any bearing on your value as an Alpha, I do believe that many of your anxieties stem from low self-esteem and that increased financial autonomy would improve your self-esteem, thereby eliminating a portion of anxiety.” 

“What’s that got ta’ do with him?” 

“You said that he was hired to take the hours that you couldn’t. I think that perhaps your animosity toward Mr. Cook is the result of your having projected your anxieties onto him or at least that one particular anxiety.” 

Dennis supposes that that makes sense but... no... that isn’t it. All at once, he realizes what it is. 

“He’s got a smell.” 

“...come again?” 

“It’s a sorta’... tangy... bitter smell like... bile and urine and... fear sweat. Nobody else seems ta’ notice it and that makes it worse cause it’s like I’m... trapped with it... every time I think about him it’s like I can smell it... in my head.” 

As he’s been talking he’s grown tenser and tenser. His eyes are locked on the floor in front of the doctor. If he looked up at her, he’d see that she looks worried. He leaves with an increase in the dosage of his antianxiety med and her advice to avoid John Cooke if possible. It isn’t possible but he doesn’t tell her that because he doesn’t WANT to avoid the man. It’s an odd feeling; like he’s fascinated by the intensity of his instantaneous loathing for this man that he barely knows. It’s like a car wreck, he can’t look away. He lays awake that night, turning his newfound loathing over and over in his head. By morning, he's certain that John Cooke is the worst human being that he's ever met.


	24. Wound up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry and Dennis spend an afternoon together.

It’s a drizzly afternoon and Barry and Dennis are in Barry’s bed, indulging in a little game that they at some point began playing. Dennis had come straight to Orwell’s after work, let himself in with the key Barrys given him, and surprised Barry while he was in the middle of pinning fabric to his dressmaking dummy by grabbing and throwing him down on the bed. They’d proceeded to sort of wrestle, play fighting like puppies until Dennis had him pinned; knee planted between his thighs, one hand holding his right arm down on the bed just above his head, the other hand holding his lower jaw to keep him from turning his head (as if he would) while Dennis kisses him like he’s trying to suck the air out of his lungs. Barry has never ‘won’ this game but that doesn’t much bother him. In fact, he only puts up just enough of a struggle to give Dennis satisfaction before succumbing to how good and right it feels to be under his Alpha; surrounded by his heat and strength and scent. 

For a while he just relaxes and lets Dennis use him, deepening the kiss, grinding down against him through their clothes but when he feels like enough time has passed, he reaches up with his unrestrained hand and strokes the back of Dennis’s neck until the Alpha starts to relax. Dennis pulls back, looking almost embarrassed but Barry wraps both of his arms around his neck, the right one having been freed by now, and starts kissing him again more tenderly. Dennis is willing to undress in front of Barry now but Barry is still careful not to stare at his scars. When they’re back together on the bed, Barry can’t resist pressing kisses to the ones on his shoulders but he keeps them brief before moving further down the other man’s body. 

Dennis still finds it hard to believe that Barry actually enjoys giving oral. He’d assumed that Barry had only been doing it to please him and had told him that he didn’t need to ‘do that every time’ but Barry had assured him that it was no trouble at all. Similarly, Dennis had been surprised that Barry actually wanted to be anally penetrated. He’d assumed that that was only pleasurable for the one doing the penetrating and said that he didn’t want to hurt Barry. When Barry asked why he assumed that it was always painful for the recipient, Dennis said that the only place he’d ever seen it was in the ‘films’ he watched, and there it always looked like it hurt. 

This was how Barry wound up watching a selection from Dennis’s porn collection. Dennis had been so embarrassed that he’d left the room while Barry watched it. The content had definitely been... not to Barry’s taste and he’d made Dennis promise that he would NEVER use porn to learn about sex. After that, they’d had a long discussion about the technical aspects of gay sex (Dennis does not watch gay porn) and how it could be done safely and hygienically (which Barry assumed was among Dennis’s concerns.) The first time they’d tried it, Dennis had been shaky and anxious and hadn’t lasted long but he’d gotten better with practice. Dennis is a quick learner and VERY eager to please... Barry sometimes wonders how he got so lucky. 

When they’re both sated, they fall asleep for a while. As Barry drifts off, Dennis’s head is on his chest and his hands are still idly roaming his body. While Dennis seems to appreciate the results of waxing, he himself shaves which Barry assumes is because of his social anxiety. Dennis couldn’t stand to have a complete stranger looking at him and touching him that much. When Barry wakes up he hears the shower in the other room. Dennis always showers after work because one of the many things that he hates about his job is how hot and dusty it is inside the building. 

Barry sometimes thinks that Dennis would be happier if he didn’t have to work, that is, if he could get over the internalized notion that the Alpha is SUPPOSED to be the breadwinner. For now, employment is very important to his sense of self-worth to the extent that he even ignores Patricia’s comments about the ‘pointlessness’ of his having a job outside of the boarding house. Barry is glad that Dennis doesn’t listen to her since he’s years away from being financially stable enough to support another person and he doesn’t want his Alpha getting any more dependent on that woman than he already is. He supposes that he could interpret her willingness to support Dennis despite her own limited financial means as kindness on her part but something stops him from doing that... namely, the fact that he’s MET her. He fully expects the process of slowly, gently prying her claws out of Dennis’s flesh to take at least as long as it’ll take for him to lock down a decent paycheck. 

Barry rises, puts his clothes back on, and goes back to what he’d been doing when Dennis showed up. Before too long, the Alpha reemerges from the bathroom dressed in a clean outfit that’s identical to the one he’d been wearing before. Barry means to eventually address that but when the other man is actually in the room, he finds himself unable to. It’s occurred to him that, at Dennis’s size, finding clothing that fits well probably isn’t easy and he doesn’t want to make Dennis any more self-conscious. He considers asking to take his measurements, then he can just find the clothes himself and give them to him when the opportunity presents itself. 

“When’s your birthday?” 

Dennis pauses in buttoning his shirt. 

“Why?” 

Barry shrugs. 

“It’s just the sort’a thing that people who are datin’ usually know about eachother... Mines June second.” 

“... October third.” Dennis says hesitantly and Barry laughs. 

“Don’t worry, I’m not gonna’ throw you a surprise party or anything. I’m not a monster.” 

That gets a little smirk out of Dennis. For a while, a comfortable silence descends during which Dennis sits on the bed and watches Barry work. He gets a little glassy-eyed if Barry tries to talk to him about the intricacies of clothing design but he seems to like watching him work with his hands. 

“How’ve things been at work?” 

“...like usual.” 

“You sure? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I LOVE your copin’ methods but lately, you’ve seemed more... wound up than usual when ya’ come home.” 

There’s a long pause during which Dennis seems to be considering saying something but then... 

“It’s nothin’... just been kinda’ busy lately.” 

Barry’s not entirely sure what Dennis does for a living and Dennis hasn’t volunteered any details because he’s generally just not one to volunteer details. Barry considers pursuing the matter further but then decides not to. 

“You sleepin’ over tonight?” 

Dennis appears conflicted. 

“Yeah... I gotta’ help Miss Patricia with somethin’ tomorrow but that ain’t til ten.” 

“What’s she need ya for?” 

“Just intervewin’ some possible tenants.” 

“Didn’t you do that last week.” 

“Gonna’ be doin’ it fer a while before we find somebody decent. Rentin’ out single rooms month by month doesn’t attract the most reliable clientele.” 

“...guess ya’ don’t want another person who’s gonna’ off themself.’ 

“Mr. Rampart paid his rent on time.” 

Barry’s not sure what to say to that so he just keeps working. About an hour later Jade comes home. Barry had had a talk with her after the first time Dennis came over so she doesn’t pry now... as much. He supposes that it was partially his fault for dumping the kinky nun cult thing on her right before he came over. When they kiss, Barry can’t help but notice Dennis looking away as if waning to give them privacy. 

Barry supposes that someday soon they’ll need to talk about what exactly the rules are regarding intimacy among the three of them. In a more conventional pack, Dennis and Orwell would determine which of them was the Prime Alpha through a contest of strength (more often than not a literal fistfight) and if Dennis won he would be the Pack Leader. He could order Orwell out of the pack or permit him to stay under the condition that he accepts his subordinate position (in packs with multiple Alphas, very complex pecking orders can form.) As Pack Leader, Dennis would be allowed to have sex with anyone who ranked below him and would have the final say in who was allowed to sleep with who... That is absolutely NOT happening because they are not cave people but Barry thinks that it would be best if they mutually agreed on some boundaries. That doesn’t need to happen tonight though. 

The rest of the night passes relatively smoothly. The three of them order Thai food and binge-watch the rest of the mini-series. Dennis is quiet but Barry doesn’t think that that’s necessarily a bad sign. He sits between the on the couch to avoid making it seem like he’s favoring either one. Orwell comes home late and Jade goes to bed with him. 

Barry and Dennis go to bed shortly after and, as usual, Barry falls asleep first with Dennis holding him... a little tighter than usual. If it had happened in the reverse order, Barry would have noticed that Dennis has begun to grind his teeth in his sleep.


	25. A Hook.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dennis has a dream.  
> Barry wants to move things forward but doesn't know how.

For the first time in what feels like a long time, Dennis dreams about the little girl in the forest. He cannot see her because he is seeing through her eyes but somehow he knows that it’s her. The monster is not in pursuit of her at this moment but she knows better than to relax, he is always near even if she cannot see or hear him. Tired, she kneels beside a pool of water. She reaches down into the water with cupped hands and Dennis is struck by her reflection. 

She is not a little girl anymore but a girl just on the cusp of womanhood. Forgetting her purpose for reaching into the water, she furrows her brow and stares down into it. Dennis wonders why her own reflection would perplex her but then it dawns on him that... she can see him. She is not looking into the eyes of her own reflection but into his eyes and there is no pool. 

His eyes are his own now and he is spotting her from across a clearing. She is in front of him and behind her, the woods seem far darker than it makes sense for them to be considering that the clearing is lit by sunlight. In the shadows, he sees a looming shape moving toward her, and instinctively he knows that he has to reach her before it does or... or what? Then he wakes up. 

His stomach aches and his head aches and his jaw aches. He has to climb over Barry because they stayed at the boarding house last night and his bed is against a wall but he manages without waking the Omega up. Dennis envies how easy it is for Barry to fall asleep and how heavily he sleeps once he gets that way. He changes into his sweatpants and running shoes and considers kissing Barry goodbye before he goes but thinks better of it. SOMEONE should get some sleep. 

Out in the sharp chill of the early morning, Dennis finds himself running faster than he normally would. He keeps feeling as if he’s running from something or... chasing something(?) and he keeps having to stop because he starts hyperventilating. Exercise has never made him panic before, it usually has the opposite effect. Try as he might, he can’t seem to get himself into the meditative state that running usually induces so when he finishes he’s more wound up than he was before. For the first time, he’s considering taking one of his valiums when he gets home, he knows where Miss Patricia keeps it and has the same cupboard keys that she does. 

\------ 

The absence of Dennis’s body heat eventually wakes Barry up but he’s in no hurry to go downstairs. He browses Pinterest on his phone, checks his social media accounts, looks at the weather and the news. He tells himself that he’s not AFRAID of Patricia, he’d just rather she was not the first person he speaks to right after he wakes up. She has begun to begrudgingly tolerate his occasional presence in her house, presumably because it means that Dennis will be around more, but being here is still not necessarily a positive experience. Barry also can’t help but notice that whenever he keeps Dennis away for more than two nights in a row, something in the boarding house always seems to break. 

Dennis says that this is just because it’s an old house but well... how does the HOUSE know when he is and isn’t there? Barry knows that eventually he and Dennis are going to have to talk about all this but he doesn’t want to rush it. Patricia’s been the only constant in Dennis’s life for at least ten years now and Barry has been around less than a year. Even considering their soul bond, Barry’s not naive enough to think that he ranks above her. It also doesn’t help that Barry isn’t sure exactly what he’s going to say when he does get around to saying something. 

He has a feeling that Dennis would not be receptive to the suggestion that they move in together. This is partly because he doubts that Dennis will want to leave Patricia (even though he’d only be a ten-minute walk from her) but also because at present moving in with Barry will mean moving into Orwell’s house, another Alpha’s territory. He hasn’t asked Orwell because he feels like it would be premature but he’s pretty sure that Orwell wouldn’t have a problem with Dennis moving in. Orwell isn’t even a tiny bit threatened by Dennis which is less of an insult to Dennis and more of a testament to just how difficult to rattle Orwell is. A lesser Alpha wouldn’t have even allowed Barry to bring Dennis into the house. 

Barry also doesn’t want to add to the stress that Dennis has obviously been under lately. Dennis just keeps insisting he’s fine but there’s clearly something eating at him and the most Barry can discern is that it has something to do with work... maybe. Barry is pulled out of his thoughts by Dennis coming into the room. He runs an hour every morning and sometimes also in the evening because he’s apparently some kind of machine. Barry would raise concerns about him possibly overdoing it but it’s hard to argue with those results. 

“Morning, Stud.” 

“Mornin’... it alright if I shower first.” 

“Go fer it.” Barry learned the hard way that if you don’t get your shower in early around here you wind up stuck with cold water but in his current state Dennis needs it more. Dennis starts for the bathroom but then stops, looks at Barry, and then abruptly looks away, running his tongue over his upper lip. 

“Would ya’ maybe wanna’...?” 

As it dawns on Barry what Dennis is trying to ask, he feels a smile spread across his face. 

“Well, if you’re gonna’ twist my arm.” 

In the time since they’ve started dating, Barry has gotten Dennis to start using both body wash and face wash, before he had just been lathering up head to foot with bar soap (*gasp*), and using the appropriate moisturizers (provided they are unscented.) They’ve discovered that, in a pinch, both the body wash and the body lotion can be used as lube. Barry has also learned that when Dennis is stressed, his already robust sex drive becomes absolutely RAVENOUS. Most of the time, like now, this is just fine with Barry but sometimes it can get a little... exhausting. Barry likes to think that he’s pretty accommodating but sometimes when he has an early class the next morning and they’ve already done three times and Dennis is showing no signs of slowing down, Barry can’t help but wonder when Dennis’s other soulmate plans on making an appearance. 

Barry can’t bring himself to openly reject his Alpha’s advances but sometimes Dennis picks up on his lack of enthusiasm and leaves off... Then, when he thinks Barry has fallen asleep, he gets up, goes into the bathroom, and stays in there a weirdly long time. For the present, though, everything’s just swell. Barry had never really gotten into shower sex but he’s also never been with a partner who was this much stronger than him. Dennis has no trouble holding him up against the wall as he pounds into him. Barry wraps one leg around Dennis’s waist and angles his hips just so so that Dennis’s cock brushes his prostate with each thrust. 

If the tenants weren’t already assuming that they were an item based on the fact that they’re two grown men who share a room that only has one bed in it, they’ve definitely picked up on that from the noises that they undoubtedly hear Barry making through the buildings thin walls. Dennis tends not to make much noise but that mostly because he muffled it by biting or sucking on Barry’s neck. Jade teases Barry about all the hickeys and little bruises on his neck and shoulders. The marks themselves don’t bother Barry much but he has read that a tendency to leave marks like that may be a sign that his Alpha is feeling that his claim is threatened but... by who? ... does Dennis think that Barry is fucking Orwell? 

They get out of the shower and Barry coaxes Dennis to lie back down on the bed. Dennis does so reluctantly which Barry honestly finds kind of impressive since if he’d ran for an hour and then done what Dennis just did in the shower he’d be passed out right now. He gets out the unscented, hypoallergenic body lotion that he bought Dennis and begins to meticulously massage it into his Alpha’s back. There’s something about taking care of Dennis in these sorts of ways that gives Barry a deep, instinctive satisfaction. He also never fails to appreciate what a privilege it is to get to see and touch Dennis’s naked skin. 

Over the thick muscle of Dennis’s back there is a frighteningly intricate tapestry (layer upon layer) of scars made all the more tragic by the fact that whoever put them there (his mother... Barry KNOWS it was his mother) seemed to have taken deliberate care to assure that they could be easily hidden. The worst ones are these sort of deep, jagged scrapes... like the skin got snagged by a big hook. Barry has to resist the compulsion to press a kiss to each and everyone and then to just hold Dennis and promise him that no one will ever hurt him again... As if there were anything that could actually hurt him that Barry would have any chance of defending him against. 

When Barry tells Dennis to roll over and gets no response, he realizes that Dennis has fallen asleep. Smiling and feeling an ache in his chest, Barry kisses him on the back of the neck and then turns out the bedside lamp, draws the curtains, and curls up on the little remaining space on the bed. Some times later Barry is awoken by the sounds of Dennis dressing. Dennis tells Barry that he has some errands to run but that Barry can stay here if he likes. Barry says that, if it’s not too much trouble, he’d prefer that Dennis drop him off at home. Dennis acquiesces without even asking why. 

On the drive, Barry lightly asks Dennis if he had a rough night, not expecting much in the way of a response. What he gets is a long pause during which Dennis repeatedly looks over at him as if he has something to say but isn’t sure he should say it. Eventually, Dennis asks, shyly, as if it’s not already a regular occurrence. 

“Can I come over later?” 

“Honey, of course.” 

Before they part he gives Barry a lingering kiss that leaves him feeling empty as the truck pulls away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm going to try to cycle through my stories, updating a different one each week. If my brain cooperated this should lead to them all progressing at a better pace and some maybe eventually getting finished... or I might just wind up starting a new AU and progressing nothing.


	26. Visitor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Information comes to light.

One morning while Barry is trying to get Dennis to linger in bed with him as long as possible, there’s a knock on the bedroom door. Dennis goes to answer it and from his place on the bed, Barry can hear Patricia’s tense voice informing Dennis that he ‘has a visitor.’ Closing the door, Dennis begins hurriedly dressing, seeming to know what Patricia is referring to. 

“What is it?” 

“Hopefully not what I think it is.” The Alpha murmurs, irritatedly. This is enough to get Barry out of bed and dressed to follow him downstairs. On the front porch is a little boy and when he noticeably brightens upon seeing Dennis, Barry realizes that it’s the same little boy who’d been waiting on the curb with his mother the first time he’d come home with Dennis. 

“Well.” Patricia says sharply, making the boy jump. “Tell him why you’re here.” 

The boy’s eyes dart from her to Dennis; he hesitates but then the words come out in a sudden gush like a dam bursting. 

“M-Mr. Rico wanted Ma ta’ go ta’ Las Vegas wit him b-but you gotta’ be twenty one ta go there so he said I couldn’t go but Ma said I could stay wit you.” 

“Did she?” Dennis says flatly, clearly trying not to let his agitation show in front of the kid. Patricia turns sharply and stalks back into the house before Dennis can say anything to her. He turns back to the kid. “Wait here, ok?” 

The kid nods and Dennis goes back into the house, leaving Barry alone with the kid. Barry isn’t great with kids. He doesn’t dislike them, he’s just not one of those people who naturally clicks with them. 

“Hey... I’m Barry.” 

The kid looks him up and down. 

“I’m Hedwig and I have blue socks.” 

Barry’s not sure how to respond to that and it doesn’t help that the kid keeps looking at him like he’s a rack of yard tools. 

“...nice... I’m just gonna’...” He motions vaguely toward the house. “You should probably wait here.” 

When Barry comes into the kitchen, Patricia is stirring something on the stove. This seems to be what she does purely out of habit whenever she enters the kitchen... there may only be water in that pot. Dennis is standing behind her, near the table, talking in the soft, gently pleading tone that Barry will eventually learn he uses when he’s trying to get her to change her mind about something. Her responses are hisses out in a near whisper presumably because there may be tenants up at this point and they don’t want to be heard having a disagreement. They are always ‘disagreements’, never ‘arguments.’ 

“...it occurs to me that there are people that one can call about these sorts of things.” 

“I can’t do that ta’ the kid...” 

“Shall I?” 

“Just... please, don’t... let me handle it.” 

“Then handle it ELSEWHERE, that child is not staying in this house, not for a day, not for an hour, not for a single minute, do you understand me?” 

Dennis sighs and frustratedly rakes a hand over his scalp. 

“Please, just while I go ta’ work... I’ll figure it out when I get back.” 

“You’ll ‘figure it out’ now.” 

“It ain’t like he doesn’t behave fer you.” 

“Yes.” She laughs bitterly. “I imagine that’s because his dear mother told him that I would CASTRATE him if he didn’t.” 

It’s at this point that Barry notices that Patricia is the most visibly upset he’s ever seen her... even more so than when the police had been questioning her about the DEAD BODY upstairs. 

“Y-yer right, she shouldn’t talk like that but it’s not the kid’s fault.” 

“Yes, I’m sure that she anticipated you’re seeing it that way since her attempts to use that child to manipulate you have never failed before.” She rounds on Dennis, seems to notice Barry for the first time, and then looks a bit embarrassed which is another first. She goes on in a more even tone. “I won’t be manipulated along with you, dear, and I want no part of that woman in MY house. I have made myself clear and this is the last time I intend to do so. The matter is CLOSED.” 

Before Dennis can respond, Barry speaks up. 

“I got nothin’ goin’ on during yer shift... he can Orwell’s with me.’ 

Barry’s not exactly thrilled at the prospect but that’s clearly the only solution and he knows that Dennis won’t ever ask him for a favor on his own. Patricia rolls her eyes while Dennis looks conflicted. 

“I couldn’t ask ya’ to do that.” 

“I’d just be babysitting fer five hours, not giving you a kidney... it’s no big deal.” 

“Suppose it goes on for a week.” Patrica murmurs under her breath and Barry raises an eyebrow. Patricia pretends not to notice and goes back to what she’d been doing on the stove, leaving Dennis to explain. 

“When she was livin’ here she’d sometimes... wander off and leave the kid here by himself... usually I’d look after ‘im.” 

“And I’m sure those two things were in no way connected.” Patrica’s soft voice drips with sarcasm. Barry ignores her and just talks to Dennis. 

“I can’t do a WEEK but I can handle the time durin’ yer shift then we can... figure it out.” 

Dennis hesitates a long time, clearly not wanting to accept the offer but seeing no other option. 

“...ok... where is he?” 

The two of them rush back outside but find Hedwig still on the front porch talking to Nadine. Nadine is a female Omega who moved into the boarding house just after getting out of prison. She frequently talks about the rest of her Pack (who are all still in prison) and how they’ll be getting a place together when they’re all reunited again. She also says that Patricia is nothing compared to the ‘sadistic cunts’ who ran the Catholic group home that she grew up in. She’s told Barry stories that make him infinitely thankful for the fact that the home he and Jade lived in was a secular operation. 

Despite Dennis’s limited responses, Hedwig is eager to tell him EVERYTHING that's happened since they last saw each other. Apparently he and his mom had been couch surfing among a group of friends of his mother until just recently when she managed to convince Mr. Rico, who is his mother's soulmate but not Hedwig's father to let them stay at his place. Later, when they're alone again, Dennis will explain that Mr. Rico shares a house with a pack consisting of four female Omegas, one male Omega and three Alphas. The Pack has six kids between them all of whom treat Hedwig like shit whenever they stay there on account of his not 'belonging' there. Mr. Rico himself isn't unkind to Hedwig but the rest of the pack has made it clear that Crystal can only move in with them if she doesn't bring Hedwig with her and he's not about to start a dispute with his own pack over a kid that isn't his. 

To further complicate things, Mr. Rico is a professional gambler and the only way to make good money doing that is to spend a considerable portion of the year traveling around to tournaments. Mr. Rico is also not the dominant Alpha in his pack, that would be his younger brother Marco. Dennis only knows so much about that situation because at one point Crystal had somehow given Rico the idea that she was sleeping with Dennis. This had lead to his coming to the boarding house and challenging Dennis to a fight. By Nadine's account, this 'fight' had been hilarious because it had basically consisted of Dennis standing on the front porch and telling the other man that of he wanted to fight him he'd have to come up there and then pushing him down every time he tried to come up the stairs. This had gone on for about fifteen minutes before Rico relented and left out of sheer embarrassment. The next day Marco had come and apologized for the misunderstanding on his brother's behalf, presumably after getting the truth out of Crystal. 

When they get to Orwell’s house it takes Dennis longer than necessary to depart because he keeps apologizing, he also makes Hedwig promise that he will 'be good for Mr. Barry.' Barry tries not to read too much into the fact that Dennis makes sure the kid isn't looking before kissing him goodbye. Once they're alone, the questions start. 

"Yer house is real big...are you rich?" 

Barry laughs. 

"No, I just live with somebody who is." 

"Is he yer pack leader?" 

Technically the answer is yes but the three of them have never felt the need to complicate things with labels. 

"Not really." 

"Is Mr. Dennis in yer pack now?" 

"... uh... kinda'... I guess." 

"Is he gonn’a fight that other guy?" 

"...no." 

Hedwig smiles. 

"Yeah, I bet that other guy won't cause he's scared. Mr. Dennis is stronger than everybody even Mr. Marco." 

Not knowing how to respond, Barry opts to change the subject. 

"Ya like TV?... we got a TV." 

He takes the kid into the one sitting room with a TV in it and Hedwig is predictably impressed by the size of said TV. When he'd lived here alone Orwell hadn't bothered with one but that had been one of the first things Jade had insisted on changing when she and Barry moved in claiming "only serial killers don't own TVs." The kid turns on a channel that seems to mostly play music videos, he goes into his backpack and takes out a series of sketch pads, coloring books, comic books and magazines. He catches Barry looking at a collage he's made on the cover of the largest sketchbook and explains that that's 'the pack I'm gonn’a be in when I grow up.' Most of the members of the 'pack' are female rappers (the pictures appear to have been cut from the sorts of magazines most people wouldn't let a child read) but also She Hulk, Harley Quinn, Batwoman and Dead Pool. 

Without prompting, Hedwig launched into explanations of who they all are and why he likes them. This segways into talk about who all of them are rumored to have dated and rather or not they could be in the pack and rather or not Hedwig thinks he could beat them up (Drake is apparently a 'little bitch.') At around noon, Barry goes into the kitchen to make lunch, not so much because he suspects the kid is hungry but because it's quiet in the kitchen. When he comes back out the kid is nowhere to be found. In a mild panic he searches and eventually find him in Orwell’s study. 

"Oh no, no, no." Taking in the papers scattered all over the floor, Barry begins to really panic. The kid drops the pages he'd been holding and raises his hand in an I'm-not-touching-anything gesture. Barry falls to his knees and begins picking up the papers and when the kid tries to help him he bats his hand away. "Go back to the living room!" 

The kid runs back to the living room, leaving Barry to clean up the mess. Luckily most of the papers seemed to have come from the same old cardboard filing box that was taken from the bottom shelf of the book case. Barry puts them back in carefully, hoping that they weren't in any particular order or at least that Orwell doesn't have any reason to look in there in the near future. They appear to be old court documents which means that they were probably left by Orwell’s father. Returning to the living room, Barry finds the kid curled up in a corner of the couch... as if he's trying to make himself as small as possible... shit. 

"I'm sorry I yelled it's just... my roommate, the one who owns the house, uses that room for his work and he gets really upset when people move stuff around in there." 

The kid looks up at him timidly. 

"Is he gonn’a be mad?" 

Barry takes a deep breath. 

"We're not gonn’a tell him,ok? Just don't go in there again." 

"...ok." 

Things are uncomfortably silent after that but the kid does eventually uncoil himself and start eating. The kid keeps looking over at Barry and eventually hesitantly asks. 

"What's yer roommate do... fer his work?" 

"He's a teacher but he also writes books." 

The kid looks confused. 

"Is he writin' a book about Mr . Dennis?" 

Now Barry looks confused. 

"...I don't... THINK so...why?" 

The kid hesitantly reaches into his back pack and takes out an old photograph. 

"I-I just wanted it so he could be inn'a pack." He explains and then hands the photo to Barry. Barry looks at the picture and can't process what he's seeing because... it's Dennis. He's a lot younger and softer and he doesn't have glasses but it's unmistakably him and... this is a mug shot... he is looking at Dennis’s mug shot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise Casey appears in the next chapter.


	27. Brown Paper Bag

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dennis goes to work.  
> Casey misses school.
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING!!!! RAPE/INCEST!!!!!  
> If you don't want to read about this you can safely read Dennis’s part but STOP THERE.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ADDITIONAL TRIGGER WARNING!!!  
> This is a ROUGH one!  
> Descriptions of RAPE!  
> You have been warned.

Dennis is in even LESS of a mood to see John Cooke today than he would normally be. The last thing he needs after the morning he’s had is a day being shadowed by the most loathsome creature ever to slither the face of the earth. What’s worse is no one else seems to see how clearly repugnant the man is, in fact, a lot of his coworkers seem to like him which is baffling to Dennis. How can they not see it? How can they not SMELL it? 

“Morning, how was your weekend?” 

“...fine.” Is all Dennis can manage to say. He can’t even look at the man without thinking about how he’d like to see him dead. He’d like to crack open his skull and unspool his brain but... no... that’d be too quick... too merciful. 

“Good,uh... I just helped Buck paint his garage.” 

He’s talking about Mr. Hurley, one of the managers with whom he’s been living for some reason. This makes Dennis think less of Mr. Hurley because what kind of man would let THAT into his house, near his FAMILY. Dennis says nothing but the man still keeps pitifully grasping at straws to make conversation. He’s PATHETIC, like a dog begging for scraps. 

“But, if I had my choice I’d be fishing or hunting... you a hunting man, Dennis?” 

“...no.” Dennis doesn’t hunt but he certainly wouldn’t mind being out somewhere secluded with this man and a firearm. Not that he understands the compulsion that some people have to go into an animal’s HOME and kill it while it’s just minding its own business. It’s sick is what it is... John Cooke is a SICK man and his fingernails are FILTHY and he picks his nose when he thinks none’s looking, he picks his nose and EATS it and he is a fucking MONSTER. A part of Dennis’s mind KNOWS that all these thoughts are irrational to the point of being downright crazy but he just can’t help it, he just hates this fucking fat sack of shit SO goddam much. 

Eventually he ducks into the handicapped bathroom because it’s separate from the public one and he needs to be ALONE. He can’t breathe and his heart is racing... it’s a panic attack... he’s having a fucking panic attack because there is just too damn much on his mind and... something else... something is fundamentally different... what is it? He should go home. He’s never taken a sick day before so it wouldn’t be held against him and Dr. Fletcher’s been saying that he should learn how to tell when he’s overtaxing himself. He just SO badly wants... NEEDS to go back to Barry. He shouldn’t have left that situation, it’s HIS responsibility and it wasn’t right of him to hand it off to Barry. All he’s done since they’ve met is make Barry’s life harder and it’s only a matter of time before the Omega comes to his senses and leaves him because that’s what he deserves and...and... 

When he emerges from the bathroom everything seems too bright and too loud. When John Cooke comes back over to him it takes a conscious effort on his part not to physically strike the man. He wants to knock him to the ground and stomp on his head until his ugly face is reduced to a bloody pulp. 

"You doing alright?" 

"...no." Dennis says and his voice sounds strange to his own ears. "I-uh, I get these migraines (it's not a complete lie; Dennis does get migraines, that's just not what this is)... can you manage the rest'a the shift if I leave?" 

"Sure, man, no problem." The man adopts a look of concern that Dennis somehow knows is fake. Most everything about John Cooke is fake; how is he the only one who sees it? He goes to the front office to inform them of his departure and the reason for it (the fake reason since he can't tell them the real one without seeming crazy... he knows some of the people here already think that he is... maybe they ALL do.) The front office is where he sees Casey for the first time. 

\------ 

Their current living situation must have lulled Casey into a false sense of security because when things finally do go back to normal it catches her completely off guard. She's showering before school and, unbeknownst to her, Buck and Joanne have both left the house earlier than usual that morning... The reason doesn't really matter, does it? All that really matters is that that means she's now completely alone with John for the first time in this house. If either of them had even casually mentioned their plans for the next morning the night before, Casey would have skipped showering that day and made sure to be out of the house before they were but they didn't... She's sure of that. 

As has been her practice for as long as she remembers, she dressed before leaving the bathroom. She doesn't like how her clothes stick to her still slightly damp skin but she learned a long time ago that seeing her in a towel gives John ideas. If she'd had any idea that she'd be alone with John after she got out of the shower, she'd have at the very least put her backpack and her boots by the front door so she could just go downstairs and leave immediately instead of going back into her room... where he was waiting for her. She didn't have any idea, though, so she goes (completely unsuspecting) back into her room to get them. Even when she sees him standing there, it doesn't dawn on her what's about to happen since she assumes that their hosts are right downstairs having breakfast. 

She puts up more of a fight than she has in a long time just because she's so surprised but all it gets her is a slap that makes her ears ring and her arm wrenched painfully behind her back as he bends her over Melody's desk. He only pulls her leggings down to just below her ass and when he spits on his fingers and slides them over her back entrance it dawns on her what he plans to do and she reflexively renews her struggle but all it does is send a sharp jolt of pain through her pinned arm. She screams despite having realized by now that no one will hear it. As punishment for her 'acting up' he goes in dry. It hurts, it hurts SO much and she can feel when she starts to bleed but she doesn't give him the satisfaction of hearing her scream again. 

When he spills inside her he's babbling against her ear about how good she feels and how much he's missed this and how much he loves her and she's sobbing through her gritted teeth. He lies on to of her for a while after and she can't breathe because he's so heavy. He kisses her on the temple one more time and then gets off her, rights his clothing, tells her to clean up the mess before she goes to school and then just... leaves. Once she's sure he's gone she goes to the bed, curls into a tight ball and cries in big, choking sobs that rack her whole body. She goes on like that until her mind clears enough to remind her that if John does come back and find her 'carrying on' he'll punish her and if she's too responsive while he's hitting her he'll get hard (it's something about the noises she makes) and then he'll... do it again. 

Get it together, she tells herself, get it the fuck together Cooke. She goes back into the shower and washed again in water so hot it hurts. She just mechanically scrubs her whole body, not wanting to linger too long in any particular place and almost starts crying again but forces it back down. When she gets out she rushes to the toilet and pukes; all she'd had so far was coffee so it tastes like sugar and cream and bile. She flushes, then cleans the toilet then brushes her teeth. 

When she's dressed again she goes back into Melody's room and begins numbly and mechanically picking up what had been knocked off the desk like the well trained little bitch that she is. Why did she struggle? She knows that it never helps and now her shoulder is killing her in a way that suggests it's going to go on doing so for some time. She continues to mentally berate herself as she cleans and winds up cleaning the whole room. By the time she finishes she's so exhausted that you'd think she just ran a marathon instead of cleaning a small bedroom. She locks the bedroom door and then, curling back up into her defensive ball, falls asleep. 

She's awoken sometime later by her phone ringing. How long had she been out? It's John, he forget his lunch and wants her to bring it to the warehouse. She knows what this is, it's him rubbing salt in the wound. He probably left it on purpose just so he'd have an excuse to demonstrate his control over her. She shouldn't do it, she should throw his lunch in the trash and then just leave and not come back. She’s almost eighteen, no one can stop her but... 

Where are you going to go, huh? Where are you going to go with no money and no friends and no driver's license...Caseybear? 

She takes the bus to the warehouse and brings the brown paper bag, lovingly packed by Joanne along with her husband's, to the front office... that's where she sees Dennis for the first time.


	28. *AUTHOR'S NOTE*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What follows is just an explanation of why I will be moderating my comments sections from now on. If you're not interested in reading about a bunch of internet drama, you can go ahead and ignore this chapter. Sorry.

I have recently turned on comment moderation for all of my works in the Split fandom and was worried that the people who regularly comment on my stories might take this personally so I felt the need to provide an explanation. 

In the comments section of chapter 26 someone who had previously not commented on any of my stories left a comment asking why Barry was surprised to have found Dennis's picture in Orwell's study and if Dennis would be saving Casey in the next chapter (you can look in that comments section to see my response, it comes after a deleted comment.) I answered these questions, which I guess was my first mistake because this apparently gave her the false impression that from there on I would be radically altering this story specifically to placate her. On the next chapter, she posted a multi-paragraph-long comment that was extremely rude and abrasive (telling me that it was a good thing that she hadn't gotten her hopes up, implying that the fact that I didn't just have Casey run away from John made her seem stupid and generally behaving as if I had asked her to edit the story for me) and expressed a lot of confusion about the workings of my version of the A/B/O universe. Since she'd never commented before and had so far done nothing but complain, my initial impulse was to remind her that if she didn't like my writing, she didn't have to read it but I thought that maybe I was being a little over-sensitive, decided to take the high road and went line by line through the wall of text she'd posted, answering her questions to the best of my ability. She responded with an equally long comment in which she asked further questions but also informed me that my answers to her previous questions had been inadequate and the chapter (which she falsely believed I had written just for her) was inadequate and that she was regretfully going to have to 'drop' my story as if she'd been doing me a favor by reading it. 

She also seemed to have forgotten what our previous interaction had been about because by now she thought that she'd asked me why I hadn't given Casey a new backstory and that the previous chapter was meant to provide that backstory. 

For anyone else who might be wondering, Casey isn't given a backstory here because her backstory in this story is the same as it was in Split. I have given the alters backstories because they weren't individual characters in the film and as a result were not given individual backstories. Similarly, I fleshed out the universe in which the story takes place because it is different than the one in which the film takes place. This is something that I thought was a given in fanfiction but apparently, it confused at least one person. 

In the altercation that followed she informed me that she was autistic in an effort to get me to back down and apologize to which I responded by informing her that I am also autistic at which point she attempted to use that information to undermine my self-confidence in a further effort to get me to demure to her. When I still didn't back down she informed me that she'd been screen capping all of my responses (but of course not anything she'd said or, I imagine, how the confrontation began.) I took this as an indication that she plans on sending some drama my way and I'd prefer not to have that cluttering up my comments sections, hence the comment moderation. 

For future reference, if you are having difficulty understanding anything in my writing, you are free to ask for clarification and if I do not believe that the story will eventually answer your questions, I will do so in the comments section. My response to your questions is not an indication that I will be allowing you to direct the story from there on out. I didn't think that that needed saying but apparently it does. If you have constructive criticism to offer just don't be rude about it and don't assume that I'll be applying it to the story going forward. Most of what I write is initially done stream of consciousness and then smoothed out later when I post it. This is why I usually don't collaborate with other authors.


	29. C.A.P.T.D

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mostly stuff about Orwell’s family.

Orwell’s father didn't hate Betas but he did see being a Beta as a medical condition for which a "cure" needed to be found. This was the reason that, when Orwell’s younger brother Samuel showed signs of being a Beta in utero, he immediately agreed to have the child begin Chemically Assisted Physiological Developmental Therapy (C.A.P.D.T. colloquially referred to as "Caping") essentially as soon as it was born. That's not hyperbole, Samuel was given his first injection in the hospital just after the nurses were finished cleaning him up. Beta Caping is the process by which a Beta child is given hormone therapy starting at as early of an age as the parents will allow in an effort to force its body to develop either male or female reproductive organs and (later) secondary sexual characteristics. Since Orwell’s father had already had children of both genders by the time Samuel was born, he'd let the doctor decide if Samuel would be a Sam or a Samantha. Since he'd already had both Alpha and Omega children he'd also later decided that the mega doses of testosterone given at puberty to force the development of Alpha characteristics were not necessary (it also sounded a little too much to him like putting a child on steroids) so Samuel was left on only the minimum dose of testosterone, causing him to ultimately develope into a male Omega with no soul marks. 

Samuel has none of the personality traits that are commonly attributed to Omegas but what he does have is severe manic depression, cluster headaches, and a far higher risk of developing either testicular or prostate cancer than the rest of the general population (depending on how long he lives it’s practically guaranteed.) These, along with a list that seems to grow by the day, are common long term side effects of Beta Caping. In spite of all this, the boy had managed to be academically gifted but this was possibly because their father offered his children no other choice. He always made it clear to his children that the only things they were entitled to were food, shelter, education, and medical care and that literally everything else must be earned. This included everything from obvious luxuries like toys to between-meal snacks and clothing other than school uniforms. 

Because of this, it didn't come as much of a surprise that after their father’s tragic death, executorship of the estate was passed (as per his will) "to whichever of my adult children has the highest grade point average." This meant that Orwell, who was 21 and averaging a 4.3 in college, inherited all of his father's responsibilities. Despite being the oldest child, Orwell’s sister Poppy did not contest this. She'd always struggled academically (at least by their father's standards) and preferred not to have the burden of "handling the money." She and Orwell had also always gotten along, so she had no reason to believe that he wouldn't do right by her. 

Since Samuel had only been 14 at the time, he hadn't even been in the running but it seems to Orwell that he at some point developed the impression that, had their father lived longer, he would have wound up the primary beneficiary. This is possible but it's not healthy to dwell on what might have been. Along with all his father’s other obligations, Orwell had also become a sort of father figure to Samuel despite neither of them being a fan of that dynamic. The thing was that after their father passed, each family member began to receive an allowance from the estate, as stipulated in the deceased patriarch’s will and things went just fine at first... until Samuel had that mental breakdown. It turned out that, in addition to ceasing his prescribed medications, the boy had been using Adderall that he purchased from a classmate to extend his manic state for as long as possible, often going up to a week without sleep. 

In addition to having the boy temporarily institutionalized, Orwell had had to take time off from his own education to figure out what was to be DONE about the situation. Samuel’s mother (Vida) immediately came back to the united states from Italy (where she’d been living since her Alpha’s death) to emphasize to Orwell how seriously she was taking the situation and how willing to help him solve the problem she was. A factor behind her eagerness to collaborate was probably the fact that Orwell now had the power to completely disinherit her son. Orwell has never been the type to do such a thing but he’s well aware of the fact that his life would be easier if he were. Going forward, conditions were placed on Samuel’s inheritance the first of them being that he attend rehab for the recreational Adderall. 

The restriction that seemed to chafe the boy the most was that he was not, under any circumstances, to be given unsupervised access to any amount of cash. His tuition and housing expenses were paid directly and everything else went onto a debit card that’s activity was closely monitored, if there were any ATM withdrawals, he would be expected to justify them. There had been a great deal of initial resistance but once they got past that, things went along relatively smoothly... until Jade came along. Samuel sees Jade as a ‘cheap little tart who got lucky’ and has never made a secret of that fact. He also thinks that Jade’s lack of hesitation in the early stages of her and Orwell’s relationship was entirely to do with her knowing that he had money which is entirely untrue. 

The day they’d met at the university Jade had been the only person attending Orwell’s lecture who didn’t know anything about him apart from what her instincts told her. Sure, she hadn’t hesitated to act on those instincts and that had been a sharp contrast to Orwell’s experiences with Rockell (who’d been hesitant out of fear that Orwell would force her to give up her career and relocate to the United States to be with him) but that’s just how she is. She’d said that if they both knew that they were going to be together, why should they waste time stalling before getting to the good part? Of course, Orwell could think of a million reasons to hesitate but she was very good at getting him to forget them. Her knack for making him forget his anxieties is the thing he likes most about her. 

It had only taken Samuel coming home for one holiday after Jade moved in for Orwell to have to banish him from the house. The two had gotten into a heated argument that had eventually come to blows the first of which had been her’s but it had been hard to blame her considering what he’d said. Orwell had told him that if he could not treat her respectfully, he was not welcome in that house. In retrospect, this was probably what he’d wanted. He’d been begging Orwell to rent him an off-campus apartment for some time and the school he was attending didn’t allow students to stay on campus during longer breaks. 

Now, as the boy is poised to graduate from college at the top of his class, his most recent blood test (another condition of his inheritance) has come up positive for amphetamine, and Orwell is once again left with the ordeal of having to decide what is to be done about the boy. He knows what he SHOULD do but... there will fall out and he has no way of knowing what form it will take or how severe it will be. This is all weighing heavily on Orwell’s mind when he comes home to find Jade wrestling with a little boy on the living room floor. It’s a bit confusing but not an unwelcome sight. Their first argument had occurred when he’d told her about his childhood and she’d implied that his father had been abusive (all be it in more colorful language) and he’d gotten very upset. 

His father had never raised his voice let alone his hand and his children had never been deprived of anything that they actually NEEDED. Perhaps his father’s parenting style only seemed abusive to her because she’d grown up in an environment where nothing was expected of her... then the shouting had started. Ultimately neither of them had apologized but much later when they’d gone to bed (facing away from eachother initially) she’d slid over to him in the dark and told him in an uncharacteristically vulnerable tone that she just didn’t want it to be that way when they had kids. All he’d been able to focus on was the fact that she’d said ‘when’ and not ‘if’ and then they’d made love. When she says that someone had left the child on Dennis’s front porch, it rises some mild alarm. 

“Do we know WHO left the boy there?” 

“Mr. Dennis is friends with my mom.” The boy chimes in. 

“Sorry,” Barry emerges from the hallway that leads to Orwell’s study (another flicker of alarm.) “Hedwig’s mom just dumped’im off without sayin’ anything and I offered to babysit while Dennis is at work.” 

Orwell looks the boy over, he is maybe six or seven... unless he’s just small for his age. Orwell doesn’t mind Dennis at all, his presence around the house is unobtrusive, and when they interact he is polite if a bit awkward, but the man doesn’t come across as the sort that would be anyone’s go-to as a baby sitter. 

“Can we keep’im?” Jade asks jokingly. 

“He can stay for dinner if Dennis intends to.” Orwell looks questioningly at Barry who seems to have become distracted by the clock... there’s something wrong. Even if it weren’t for the obvious indicators, Orwell would be able to sense the Omega’s agitation like a very subtle rippling in the air. It’s not as strong as it would be if Barry were his and if he weren’t focusing directly on the man, he might have missed it. Barry’s attention abruptly snaps back to the conversation. 

“I don’t know if he’s plannin’ on hangin’ around tonight.” 

\------ 

Casey's initial, visceral response to Dennis is not nearly as dramatic or romantic as books and movies usually depict this sort of thing. The Earth doesn't move, her heart doesn't stop or skip a beat, there's no music. An id card is required to get into the building so Casey has to go to the front office with the bag. Dennis is already in there talking to the woman at the front desk so the first part of him that Casey sees is his back. That and the sound of his voice rang a sort of bell in Casey's mind. It was like that feeling you get when you see someone that you recognize but you can't remember where from except in this Case she knew for a fact that they'd never met before. 

Following the initial tingling of recognition a sort of panic sets in and, without thinking, she drops the bag and flees the office. He abruptly stops speaking and turns to look just in time to see her leaving. Outside, she has an irrational compulsion to just RUN, to sprint down the road and keep going until her legs give out. Instead she goes and sits in the bus stop, realizing just now that she has no idea when it will be returning. She isn't surprised to eventually look up and see him standing there, looking at her as if not sure how to approach the situation. 

Well, she thinks, that makes two of us. She opts to break the silence if only because his obvious discomfort is infectious. 

"You don't look like a Barry so I'm going to guess that you're Dennis?" 

"...y-yeah... and you're... you're Cooke's...?" 

"I'm his niece." 

Dennis can't help but feel relieved that THAT man is not her father... people like that shouldn't be ALLOWED to have children. As he steps into the shelter of the bus stop, he notices it again, the smell. It's ike John Cooke's smell but different, not as sour and stale. It also doesn't elicited the same violent compulsions in him. No, this is equally troubling but in a different way. 

She doesn't seem about to run but she does slide to the far side of the bench and wrap her arms around herself as if trying to make her already slight frame as small as possible. Dennis may not be great at reading social cues but he's had enough people be made uneasy by his presence to know what it looks like. Something occurs to him. 

"Casey... that's ur name,right?" 

Since Barry's name is apparently somewhere on her, it only stands to reason that her's would be on him and the only remaining name on Barry is 'Casey.' 

"...yeah." She says it with an air of resignation, likely assuming that he knows her name because it's on his body. He briefly wonders which of his scars it used to be before returning his focus to the situation. The problem is that he has no idea what he's supposed to say or do. He ad Barry had met under controlled circumstances and even that had been awkward. Still, he can't just let her walk away. 

"Could we... maybe go somewhere ta talk?" 

She studies him long enough that he begins to wonder if maybe somehow he's completely mistaken and she isn't feeling any of what he is. The only thing that makes him doubt that is that it would be a MASSIVE coincidence if she just happened to have he and Barry's names on her but it was a different Dennis and a different Barry. That and the fact that she eventually says "...where?"


	30. The Bus.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A flashback of Dennis's childhood followed by he and Casey's first date...?  
> TRIGGER WARNING: GRAPHIC DEPICTIONS OF CHILD MOLESTATION AND PHYSICAL ABUSE.  
> Seriously, you guys, I don't know why this story is so dark, I didn't plan on it being so dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Casey is very paranoid and assumes the worst of Dennis in this chapter because of the events of Brown Paper Bag. Remember, that chapter and this chapter take place on the same day with the exception of the portion that's a flash back.

It would probably surprise people to know that the thing that Dennis had liked best about the institution was the privacy. He had his own room with its own door, sure, he wasn’t allowed to lock it and could only close it between certain hours but at least he could close it. After his father had left, he and his mother had moved into a tiny house near the train tracks in a bad part of the city. There was only one bedroom which Dennis’s mother took while Dennis slept on a mattress on the floor of what was supposed to be the dining room. As an adolescent, he would move his mattress up into the house’s unfinished attic and come home from school the next day to find that his mother had taken the door at the foot of the attic stairs off of its hinges. She offered no explanation and he’d learned by then not to ask for one. 

On one of the dining room nights, she’d come out of her room unexpectedly to find him masturbating. He doesn’t remember how old he was, only that he wasn’t old enough to even register what he was doing as sexual in nature... it had just felt good. She’d kicked him in the stomach (the mattress was on the floor) and then flown into one of her unfocused rages. The frantic hail of slaps wasn’t nearly as bad as when she met out deliberate, preplanned punishments. When the rage had passed left the room briefly and paced around the kitchen. 

When she returned, she sat at the end of his mattress and calmly explained to him that Alphas weren’t supposed to ‘do that,’ it could make him unable to ‘respond’ to a woman when he got older or even make him attracted to other boys. Of course, Dennis believed her and was mortified. He apologized shakily and promised her he’d never do it again. She’d accepted his apology and then explained to him that it was partly her fault. She explained that girls didn’t have those sorts of urges but that as they started to turn into men boys had a build-up of ‘seed’ that needed to be drained off regularly or it would make them do bad things... like what he’d been doing. She’d told him that he was never to do that again and that from now on she would do it for him. She’d had him lie down and close his eyes and then she’d... molested him for the first time. 

He didn’t realize at the time that anything inappropriate was happening because she made it seem so normal as if it were something that all mothers did for their little boys. It had only taken a few minutes and after he’d slept so much better than he usually did. For a long time after she’d just do it for him before bed but then she’d noticed one morning when she’d gotten up to get ready for work, she’d noticed that he was hard... while he was sleeping. He hadn’t woken up until she was already doing it to him and then that had become a new part of the routine. He became so accustomed to it that eventually, when he misbehaved, her not doing it for a few days would be a part of his punishment. He would get so anxious and he wouldn’t be able to sleep... 

When Dennis had his growth spurt and began to look more like a man than a boy, a lot of things changed. Mother struck him less but she punished him in other more elaborate ways and for different reasons. Once when they were at the grocery store together, a girl talked to him in a way that he’d thought was completely innocuous but when they got home mother had informed him that she was a ‘brazen little slut’ who had been ‘throwing herself at him,’ she’d had a herpes sore on her lip, hadn’t he noticed it? Later that night when she’d been... ‘draining’ him she’d noticed some skin irritation in... that area. She asked him who he’d been with? who else had been touching him there? 

He’d told her no one and she’d gotten mad. Why was he lying to her? Who was the little tramp that he’d gotten this disease from? Who was he sneaking around behind her back with? She’d made him lie in the bathtub and then heated up some water on the kitchen stove and then poured it over... that area. 

She’d kept him home from school while it healed and taken care of him. She’d explained that she had no choice, he’d gotten a disease from some little girl and that was the only way to fix it. She never did anything that drastic again but she framed most of what she did to him after that as being necessary to protect him from ‘bad little girls.’ Dr. Fletcher thinks this has to be what’s behind Dennis’s... fixation on young girls and why it’s coupled with a sort of fear of them. 

\------ 

Dennis winds up getting onto the bus with Casey. He’d initially offered to drive them to a nearby diner and Casey had started to follow him to his vehicle but then frozen. It occurred to her that, soul mark or no, she had JUST met this man and he was... massive... maybe even taller than uncle John. He could just decide to pull over to the side of the road and rape her and she’d stand about as much of a chance at stopping him as she would have of stopping on an oncoming train. A cruel little voice in the back of her mind whispered that she probably wouldn’t even try to stop him, she’d probably just freeze like she’s doing now and wait for it to be over and... she couldn’t bear it... THAT happening twice in one day and having THAT be her first interaction with this man who was supposed to be her SOUL MATE... something in her would snap and... she didn't know what would happen but she dreaded it as a fate worse than death. 

She looks up to find him watching her and looking strangely nervous; like a teenage boy about to ask his crush to the big dance. When he speaks, his tone fits his body language. 

“Would ya’ rather we took the bus?” 

She feels a rush of relief both at the fact that he isn’t going to try to force her into his truck and the fact that he isn’t asking for an explanation for her behavior. While they wait for the bus he doesn’t sit down, she will eventually learn that this is because he finds all aspects of public transportation repulsive but at the time it had seemed like he wanted to be prepared if she tried to make a run for it again. A part of her is tempted to try and she’s not sure if it’s because she wants to get away or because she just wants to know if he could catch her. She’s read that some Omega’s instinctive response to meeting their Alpha is to put up a ‘token resistance’ to test his strength. This theory has become controversial in recent years as it’s become common for rapists to claim to have mistaken their victim’s overt rejection for this ‘token resistance.’ 

The bus ride is uneventful save his wiping the seat with a yellow rag before he sits down. He takes the rag out of his pocket, swipes it over the seat, and returns it in one swift, clearly practiced motion that she may not have even noticed if she were just one of the other passengers. He repeats the same action on his seat of the booth they’re lead to when they get to their destination; one of the many greasy spoon diners that pepper Phillidelphia. Once they’ve sat, his eyes keep flickering down to the table, and when it dawns on her that he’s resisting the compulsion to wipe it down she almost laughs but her anxiety keeps it from coming out. 

He’s... germaphobic then? Casey supposes that it could be worse, in fact when it comes to all the things that she worries may be wrong with him that isn’t even ON the list, but it doesn’t make him any less intimidating. It doesn’t help that at first he just sits studying her as if she’s a complex knot that he’s been asked to untie. Eventually, he seems to realize that SOMEONE needs to talk and as the Alpha, he’s expected to take charge of the situation. 

“Ya’ can order anything ya’ like.” 

Casey is not even a little hungry but she orders soup and a half sandwich to avoid offending him. She still has no idea how he might react to a perceived slight and he looks like he’d only need one hand to strangle her. Logically she knows that it’s uncharitable to make those sorts of assumptions (and that if he were going to do a thing like that he wouldn’t do it in public) but she can’t help it... considering the circumstances. He just says that he’ll have the same thing which strikes her as... backward... like he’s taking HER lead. When the waitress walks away, Casey feels like she’s being abandoned. 

“... how old are you?” 

She figures that she may as well ask since it’s clearly the elephant in the room. He’s caught off guard, he blinks at her few times but then answers. 

“Thirty one.” 

Casey will be eighteen in two weeks but for some reason, she finds that she’d rather he didn’t know that. 

“I’m 17.” 

He winces just a little... as if he’d been worried that that was the case. He tries to smooth over it by asking an obvious, innocuous question. 

“Ya’ still in school?” 

“...yeah.” 

There’s another long pause and Casey wonders where the fuck the instincts that are meant to guide their actions in this situation are. 

“And... ya’ live with... Mr. Cooke?” 

He was clearly trying to keep the disgust out of his voice when he mentioned John but he didn’t quite nail it. Suddenly, it dawns on Casey that this is the Dennis that Buck has been trying to replace with John. So he’s ‘crazy’ then but only by Buck’s obviously very loose definition of the term. At the very least, he doesn’t seem to be a fan of John. 

“I do... my parents are out of the picture.” 

She also finds that she for some reason doesn’t want him to know about her parents...it’d be too much like baring her throat to him. Anyone else would ask why her parents are out of the picture and so she prepares for him to do so but then he just doesn’t. She will eventually learn that one of the few ways in which Dennis is socially intuitive is that if he gets the impression that a certain topic is a sore spot, he’ll avoid discussing it. This can be good or bad depending on the situation. Dennis looks as if there’s something he wants to say but then stops himself and rakes a hand over his scalp. He’s so clearly uncomfortable that she starts to feel sorry for him. 

“So you do maintenance at the warehouse?” 

“Yeah, part-time.” 

He says it as if admitting to some sort of shortcoming and she decides that she may as well get the answer to a lingering question. 

“What do you do the rest of the time?” 

“I’m a... maintenance man fer a boarding house.” 

She’s less sure why he sounds embarrassed by that and it begs another question. 

“Why do you have two part-time jobs instead of one full-time one?” 

“Uh...” He rakes his hand over his scalp again. “I just... I got... commitments.” 

“...kids?” 

Considering his age, it’s not an inappropriate question. He scratches the back of his neck. 

“...no.” 

They lapse into awkward silence again. Casey takes a bite of her sandwich, the first bite either of them has taken of any of their food. Again, as if taking her lead, he takes a bite of his soup... it’s probably cold by now. 

“What do ya’ do besides school?” 

He’s clearly asking just because it’s the sort of thing that people typically ask teenagers but she’s not about to hinder him in keeping the conversation going. 

“I like to... read and... draw.” 

Suddenly she remembers how hollow her life is and feels very depressed but he perks up a little at the word ‘draw.’ 

“... before, why did you say I didn’t look like a Barry?” 

She has misgivings about telling him that either but she’s basically already told him so there would be no point in withholding verification. 

“That’s my other soul mark... there’s you and there’s Barry.” 

For a moment he seems eager but also hesitant but then he asks. 

“Would ya’ like ta’ meet’im?” 

“... you know Barry?” 

“... we been together almost a year now.” 

“You’re... together?” 

“Yeah.” 

Dennis visibly relaxes, as if Barry being brought into the situation would be a massive relief to him. It’s for this reason only that she doesn’t suspect that he’s just lying in an effort to get her alone. Still, she’s not sure she wants any more complications introduced... what if Barry is the same as Dennis... and then she’s alone with both of them... 

“...I have to be home by five.” 

“What if I could get him ta’ come here?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had five days off of work and was planning on getting a lot of writing done but then I wound up just playing the Sims the entire time. This chapter was written bit by bit over those five days when I could get myself to focus.


	31. Candy Floss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A more detailed account of what exactly happened when Barry watched part of Dennis’s porn collection.  
> i wrote this a while back but couldn't figure out where to put so I'm making it it's own chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: Descriptions of violent S&M in the context of a role played noncon scenario.

When Barry had watched one of the videos in Dennis’s porn collection he’d been... concerned. It wasn’t that he was bothered by porn in general, he’s not a big consumer of that particular medium but nothing about it BOTHERS him, it was that this PARTICULAR porn was... concerning. It was shot like a POV, found-footage horror movie... about a man who kidnaps a very young-looking woman. Barry had googled the title of the porno on his phone immediately to make sure the woman was a legitimate, legal-aged porn actress and he wasn’t, ya know, actually watching child pornography. She goes by ‘Candy Floss’ and was 26 when this was made, she’s just very petite and has big eyes and a high-pitched voice which makes it easy for her to pass for much younger than she is. 

Anyway, the main character kidnaps the girl and then it cuts to her waking up tied up in what looks like a basement. She’s panicked at first and he waits for her to calm down and then asks her if she’s going to be good if he unties her. She nods, looking terrified (Candy is a weirdly good actress by porn standards) and he unties her. He tells her to undress and when she doesn’t comply he repeats the order in an angry bark. She starts removing her close and he tells her to go slower. 

He gives her orders that become gradually more sexual in nature and when she starts hesitating to comply he ties her back up and gags her and leaves her down there. It cuts to... presumably the next day (?) and he comes down with a bucket of water. He asks her if she would like some and she frantically nods in response to which he takes a ladle from the bucket and uses it to pour some over her gag. He does this a couple of times and then puts the ladle back in the bucket and reaches down to touch the gag. He asks her if she’ll do something for him if he takes it off and she hesitates and then nods again. 

He tells her not to talk and then removes the gag and then tells her that if she wants more water she has to... blow him. She proceeds to do so and during it, he repeatedly rams his cock down her throat making her choke and gag. He cums down her throat and then gives her some water and then puts the gag back in and leaves her down there again. This repeats but with a different method of sexually-based torture each time. Eventually, the anal sex that Dennis had said looked painful happens and... oh boy, does it. 

He’s been tying her up in increasingly uncomfortable looking positions and in this particular scene, her knees are tied to her elbows keeping her in a position where her face is pressed to the floor and her ass is in the air. He tells her that he’s going to remove the gag and that if she stays completely silent while he fucks her, he’ll untie her and let her stay untied for as long as she behaves. After getting her to agree by nodding again, he removes the gag and starts... anally penetrating her without any preparation and... yep... it sure does look like it hurts. Either it actually DOES hurt or she’s the Lawrence Olivier of porn actresses. Barry isn’t able to watch beyond that and for a while, just stays in the room by himself... recalibrating. 

He tells himself that having violent fantasies doesn’t necessarily mean anything. Dennis has never even been a little rough with him but... he’s not a woman... Does...does Dennis have issues with women? Barry’s pieced it together that his mom was abusive and probably to a pretty severe degree considering the state of his body but... Dennis doesn’t hate women, does he? He pushes the thought away, telling himself not to make assumptions. They just need to talk, that’s all, to... unpack this. 

Barry takes a deep breath and opens the door. Denis has been waiting out in the hall and comes in looking... DEEPLY ashamed. It dawns on Barry just how much effort it has taken Denis to open up to him to this degree, to expose this part of himself (that he’s never shared with ANYONE) to another person, and for a moment he can't speak because if he just blurts out what's going through his head right now things will probably take a really negative turn. 

“See... I-I don’t wanna’ hurt you... like that.” 

Dennis’s voice is a hoarse whisper and he can't met Barry's eyes. Barry crumbles. 

“Sweetie.” He reaches up and interlaces his fingers on the back of Dennis’s neck. “The guy in that video wasn’t... doing it right. If we do it right it's not gonna’ hurt and, trust me, I’m not gonna’ let you do it wrong. Ok?” 

Dennis nods shakily, seeming relieved as if he’d expected Barry to break up with him after seeing the sorts of things he jerks off to. Barry pecks Dennis on the lips and then leads him over to the bed and makes him sit down beside him. 

“I just need to know... what do you... like about that?” Barry nods at the computer on which he’d been watching the video. 

Dennis gets a little more nervous. 

“I-I talked about this with my psychiatrist...” 

“Ok, but now I want you to talk to me about it... I’m not mad or anything I’m just... confused.” 

He waits but Dennis just sits there looking progressively more wretched. 

“You’ve never been with a woman, right?” 

Barry had kind of guessed this but wasn’t 100% sure. Dennis shakes his head. 

“Ok... um...” Barry tries to think of a way to ask this that won’t make it sound like he’s mocking Dennis. “Is there a reason why or... did you just not want to?” 

Dennis gets that look he usually gets when he’s trying to think of a way to verbalize a very complex feeling which is a task that he always finds overwhelming. 

“I get... nervous.” Is all he eventually comes up with. Barry reminds himself to be patient. 

“Ok... and you think you wouldn’t be nervous around a woman who was... tied up?” 

That’s the mildest way Barry can think of the finish that question, his other options had been ‘terrified’ or ‘at your mercy’ or ‘seemingly uncomfortably young’, and all those sound too much like accusations. Dennis is avoiding eye contact again and has turned very red. He scratches the back of his neck. 

“In... in that movie I like... I like that she couldn’t get away or do anything... unexpected... that she’d have ta’ depend on me.” 

Barry thinks about it and... that’s not SO bad... except the ‘couldn’t get away’ part. 

“Why do you think...” This is really hard. “Why do you think you’d have to... make her be with you?” 

Dennis sighs frustratedly and rakes his hand over his scalp. 

“I don’t... I don’t wanna’ really do any’a that... that was the point’a all this, that I don’t wanna’ do that.” 

Dennis is clearly getting frustrated so Barry just stops talking for a while to give him a chance to calm down. He combs through what’s been said so far in his head. So... Dennis’s fantasies pertaining to women are about them not being able to leave him and about them being rendered... harmless and... predictable and... dependent. Dennis’s voice eventually breaks into his thoughts. 

“I’m sorry,” It’s a near whisper. “I shouldn’t ‘a... exposed you ta’ that.” 

Dennis bows his head and grips it in both his hands and looks so utterly wretched. Barry can’t help it, he presses gently on his shoulder until he’s upright again and then hugs him. Eventually, Dennis’s arms wrap around him and he feels the other man press his face into his hair. 

“I just want you ta’ know that I’d never hurt you.” 

“I know, baby, I know.” 

They sit like that for a long time until eventually, they disentangle and then go about the rest of the evening as though nothing out of the ordinary had happened. 


	32. Lawyer-Speak

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief flashback from the perspective of David Dunn and then Orwell explains the nature of Dennis's case to Barry in more words than are probably strictly necessary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: Discussion of injuries resulting from domestic abuse.

People who think that the mental institution where David Dunn works is packed with serial killers would be very disappointed if they ever got inside. It’s actually pretty rare for a murderer’s insanity to plea to be successful and even rarer in the cases of serial killers. For example, Bundy, Dalmer, and Wournose all tried and failed. Sure, Lecter did it but he was an actual psychiatrist and basically constructed the plea himself and used his lawyer as a mouthpiece... David has always thought that the guy seemed pretty lucid in interviews. The fact is that people lucid enough to evade detection for as long as Lecter did usually fail the insanity plea for exactly that reason. Juries figure that if someone’s ‘sane’ enough to understand that getting caught would be a bad thing and think of ways to avoid that happening then they’re probably also ‘sane’ enough to see what’s wrong with killing and eating people. 

Successful insanity pleas usually look more like the one that they’re new inmate’s lawyer pulled off. The kid is only fifteen and had stabbed his mother and then stayed in the house with her body for about a week. The body was discovered by a coworker of the boy’s mother who lived on the same block and dropped by to see why the woman hadn’t shown up for her shift in a week. The kid had answered the door and seemed nervous but that was less out of the ordinary than the fact that he was answering the door instead of his mother. Based on her brief past interactions with him, the woman had gotten the impression that he was autistic. 

She’d asked if she could speak to his mother and the boy had immediately cracked. He’d teared up and said that something was wrong, something had been wrong for days now. She’d asked if she could come in and see and the boy had let her. He’d stayed in the living room, pacing back and forth with his arms wrapped around himself, while she’d gone into the bedroom. The room had been meticulously cleaned and organized but the woman in the bed was CLEARLY dead. 

She’d gone back into the living room and told the kid, as calmly she could, that she was going to have to call someone. When questioned later, she’d said that she felt sorry for the kid at first, that she thought Penelope had just happened to die and the boy had been in shock. He had continued to seem that way until the paramedics arrived and started to touch his mother’s body at which point he’d started to become agitated. When they’d began to move her, he’d snapped. The only thing that had saved the kid from getting shot by one of the cops that had accompanied the ambulance to the scene was the fact that the burst of rage had dissipated quickly and then been replaced by sobbing hyperventilation. 

Through his trial and up until now the kid’s been kept in an isolated cell in the county prison but now that he’s been officially declared ‘not guilty by reason of mental defect’ and all the paperwork is done, it’s time for him to be moved here where he’ll stay until he’s ‘deemed fit to be released.’ David is to go along with two other security guards and two orderlies to retrieve him which seemed excessive to David until he saw the kid’s mug shot. He’s a Bull, his budding musculature is still covered by a layer of puppy fat but he’s taller than David and the men who’ll be accompanying him. He hasn’t acted up during his time in the prison but if he does decide to while being transported it won’t be easy to subdue him. 

There is some media presence outside the prison gate. This incident probably wouldn’t have gotten as much media attention if it weren’t for the part where he kept her in the house with him for a week and the fact that the man responsible for him going to an asylum instead of a juvenile detention facility until he was eighteen and then to a prison where he’d spent the rest of his life tends to draw media attention. He’s publicly known as a sort of hero lawyer. He specializes in cases where the accused cannot afford their own attorneys and are facing either the death penalty or life in prison. He EXCLUSIVELY represents the guilty, getting them lighter sentences, and publicizes the cases as much as possible to draw attention to what he feels are flaws in the justice system. Two of his former clients are already in the asylum. 

Of the other two, one is a murderer and one is a serial arsonist. Dennis is unique because of his age. At fifteen years old, he’ll be the asylum’s youngest resident by a margin of five years. Two prison guards meet them at the back of the building, where the people outside the front gate can’t see, to make the handoff. The boy is in a grey sweatsuit because they hadn’t had prison jumpsuits large enough to fit him, his hair has been buzzed off and he has the stooped posture and blotchy skin typical of teenage boys for whom puberty hits particularly hard. His wrists and ankles are shackled. 

The transfer of custody documents are signed and David takes the boy’s right arm and one of the other guards takes his left. On the way to the van the boy tenses and slows his steps just a little. David notices that he’s looking toward the front gate. He takes a guess at what the boy is worried about. 

“It’s ok, nobody can see into the van...” The boy relaxes just slightly but is still by no means relaxed. “Once we get where we’re going you won’t need to worry about reporters anymore.” 

They get into the van. The boy sits at the back, his shackles attached to a set of heavy D rings on the wall behind the bench he’s sitting on, and the three guards and one of the orderlies along the side walls. The kid keeps his eyes trained on the floor as if he expects that looking up will be met with aggression. David wonders how the guards at the prison have been treating him. David maintains his professionalism around detainees regardless of how he feels about what they’ve done but he knows that a lot of people in his line of work aren’t that ethical. 

“Don’t worry kid. The hard part’s over, now you just have to take your meds and listen to the doctors and you’ll be alright.” 

For the first time the boy looks at him and his eyes look somehow both too young and too old for his face. 

\------ 

While Jade is keeping the kid distracted Orwell asks Barry to come back into his office and asks him what’s wrong. Barry considers lying and saying nothing but... then he’d still have to explain what he’d been doing in here and... how else is he going to get an explanation? 

“Uh... the kid got in here earlier and he got into some of yer dad’s old papers... he didn’t damage anything but he did find... this.” 

Barry takes the mug shot out of his pocket and hands it to Orwell who cringes a little at seeing it creased but then actually studies it. Within a few seconds, realization dawns in his eyes. 

“...I thought he looked a little familiar... which box was it?” 

Barry goes and retrieves the box from the floor beneath one of the many bookshelves. Orwell’s brow furrows as he goes through the papers, apparently, they were in a particular order, but eventually pulls one out and scans it with his eyes. 

“Could you please, go into the other room?” 

There’s a firmness in his voice that implies that it’s not necessarily a request but Barry still doesn’t move. Orwell reads a moment longer and then looks up at him. 

“I’d like to go over the whole thing before we discuss it... please.” 

Barry reluctantly goes into the sitting room and watches cartoons with Jade and the kid for a while. Eventually, Jade slides across the couch and nestles against him to whisper in his ear. 

“What’s wrong?” 

“I’m not totally sure yet... I’ll explain later, ok?” 

She probably would press him if the kid weren’t there but since he is she just returns her attention to the TV, lying her head on his shoulder. An hour later Orwell comes back out and silently beckons to Barry. Jade gives him a questioning look but doesn’t say anything. The kid is lying on the rug and facing away from them but based on the fact that it’s been ten minutes since he’s moved or said anything Barry guesses that he’s fallen asleep. Back in the office, Orwell has laid a series of documents out on the desk, presumably to study them. He regards them silently for another moment before finally speaking to Barry. 

“As it turns out, my father did provide Dennis with legal representation a little over fifteen years ago and the crime with which he was charged was... matricide.” 

Barry supposes that that... makes sense... if he had to put money on Dennis having killed anyone it would be his mother. He’s just having a little trouble processing it because he tends not to assume that any given person he meets has never killed anyone. He thinks that’s probably how most people see the world. In fact, he doesn’t think anyone would call him naive for assuming that most people have committed zero murders. 

“Do you know what that means?” 

Orwell asks, probably because Barry’s been silently standing there for a weirdly long time. 

“Yeah... I just... I...” What the hell is he supposed to say? He has a LOT of questions but they’re all swirling around in his head like snowflakes in a blizzard so he can’t grab on to any particular one. Orwell goes on in the tone of a doctor explaining an unfortunate diagnosis to a patient. 

“He was found alone in the house with her body and based on its condition it was determined that she’d died roughly seven days earlier. He confessed almost immediately and later a doctor who examined him found what he suspected were signs of long term physical abuse-” 

“He’s got scars, like, ALL over him.” 

Orwell nods and takes a sheet of paper off the desk and hands it to Barry. Barry looks at it and quickly realizes that it’s a handy little diagram made by the doctor that consists of a rough outline of a human body on which he had drawn Dennis’s scars and written notes speculating about their cause... apparently some of the bigger ones on his back were made by ‘cutting away significant portions of the epidermis, likely with a razor blade.’ Some of his fingers 'look to have at some point been broken and improperly reset.' There are 'scald marks' in his 'groin area.' Barry is hoping that he won’t throw up but he also kind of wants to because it might make him feel better. 

“The doctor was a friend of my father, that’s how he wound up eventually getting involved.” 

“Eventually?” 

“He had another case in progress when the doctor first brought Dennis to his attention so it was several months before he could meet with him... The doctor’s suspicions were later confirmed by the second of two psychiatrists-” 

“Why did they need two?” 

“He was uncooperative with the first one... Based on the positions of some of the scars... other forms of abuse were suspected but my father ultimately opted not to implement them into his defense because he couldn’t get Dennis to overtly confirm or deny them.” 

“What ‘other forms of abuse’?” 

Orwell looks at him as if to say ‘you know what I mean’ and Barry does... he was just hoping that it was something less obvious and likely because the obvious likely thing makes him feel even more like throwing up. Orwell waits for a few beats to see if Barry has any more questions and then goes on in that same gentle yet clinical tone. 

“The verdict of his trial was ultimately ‘not guilty by reason of mental defect’ meaning that he was declared criminally insane and sent to a psychiatric facility.” 

“... how long was he in there?” 

“My father likely would have kept track of a thing like that if he hadn’t died roughly a year after the sentence was passed...” Orwell swallows. “His documentation ends with a letter he received from Dennis’s therapist after he requested an update on his progress in which Dr. Karen Fletcher says only that Dennis was complying with treatment and had not had any behavioral incidents since his arrival.” 

Barry assumes that this must be the ‘Dr. Fletcher’ that Dennis occasionally refers to... who’s apparently been a fixture in his life since he was fifteen. 

“Did your dad keep tabs on all his clients after their cases were done?” 

“Yes... he was very proud of all of them.” 

There’s a little edge in Orwell’s voice that Barry can’t decipher. For a while, they stand in awkward silence and when Orwell breaks it his tone is even more careful than before. 

“I’m not going to try to tell you how to feel about this but... I’m going to have to ask that... at least for the near future, when Jade is here and I’m not, that Dennis not come over.” 

“... you think he’s dangerous?” 

Orwell looks thoughtful and then sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. 

“I’m not saying that, I just don’t know much about him other than this and I want to ere on the side of caution... at least for the time being.” 

“He’s... never even been rough with me.” 

“I believe you and... clearly, my father strongly believed that it would have been a miscarriage of justice for him to spend his life in prison and... in my experience, my father was a good judge of character when it came to those sorts of things...” 

Orwell seems to grow briefly flustered which is not a common occurrence. 

“I’m not by any means advising you to stop seeing him... things of this nature are... complicated...” 

This is a little more familiar, it’s Orwell trying to break a topic about which he is very knowledgable down into layman’s terms. Orwell was on track to become a lawyer himself but suddenly lost interest after his dad got shot outside of the courthouse, then he shifted course and wound up with a masters in world history. 

“...I would feel guilty if my telling you this ended your relationship because... the majority of people who make SUCCESSFUL insanity pleas usually don’t re-offend if released back among the general population so... if you did decide to stop seeing him I would hope that it would be because of something he’s actually done and not because of something that you fear he may do because...” Orwell gets hung up again for a few seconds. “This (he motions to the papers on the desk) was just behavior that he exhibited once, under a very particular set of circumstances that he’s highly unlikely to ever find himself in again and he’s clearly taken extensive measures to ensure that he won’t repeat it.” 

“So yer saying that you don’t think I should worry he might kill me?” 

Barry hadn’t really been worried about that, not even now that he knows what he knows, but he felt like helping Orwell out with his summary. 

“Based on this information, and what you’ve told me, and my interactions with him I can say with relative confidence that it does not seem, to me, that he has the capacity to re-offend.” 

Sometimes Barry wonders if Orwell’s dad taught him how to talk using lawyer-speak flashcards. 

“But you’d rather he not be alone with Jade?” 

Before Orwell can answer, Barry’s cell phone goes off. It’s a text from Dennis that just says; ‘I found Casey.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be from Casey's perspective and I promise she'll finally meet Barry.


	33. Constant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry and Casey talk while Dennis sort of contributes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: Vague mentions of rape and child molestation.

It's so strange seeing Barry and Dennis at the same table that Casey finds it impossible to imagine them in the same bed, not that she's particularly inclined toward such thoughts at the moment. Barry is of average height and build for a man his age (clearly older than Casey but not by as much as Dennis) but compared to Dennis he looks small and soft. His hair is reddish-brown and falls almost to his shoulders in very loose curls, his eyes are a sharp blue that’s tempered by the general openness of his face. Despite his obvious nervousness, his smile seems reflexive and genuine. The knot in Casey's stomach loosens just a little. 

"Look at you, baby girl." Seeming to realize that no one's going to be standing up, he casually slides into the booth beside Dennis as if Dennis were not at all intimidating. He offers Casey his hand across the table. "I'm Barry... sorry, he's kinda short on details when he texts... how'd this happen?" 

"She was at the warehouse." Dennis offers. Realizing he's not going to elaborate, Casey explains. 

"I had to bring something for my uncle." 

"She lives with him." Apparently, Dennis is going to be taking a minimalist approach to this conversation. 

"Yeah... anyway we just ran into eachother..." 

Casey can't think of the right word to describe it; 'things just clicked' makes it sound like things went smoothly, 'I felt both intensely attracted and intensely repelled by him' would be more accurate but feels like oversharing. Luckily, Barry doesn't wait for her to go on. 

"You live near the warehouse?" 

She knows it's just polite conversation but she still finds herself hesitant to be too specific. 

"We're between places but we're staying with a friend of my uncle." 

Dennis suddenly tenses like a dog pricking up its ears. 

"Why are you between places?" 

Casey is torn between telling him that it's none of his business and just... telling him, telling him the actual reason... what would happen if she did? Barry's natural compulsion to fill awkward silences disrupts her train of thought. 

"Things happen." There's gentle condemnation in his voice as he places his hand over Dennis’s in what is clearly meant to be a soothing gesture. Casey is a little relieved that she's not the only one who thinks Dennis is acting odd. Maybe he's not like this (whatever this is) all the time. “So, you been right here in the city this whole time? Guess I should count myself lucky. I know people whose soulmates were scattered around the world and it’s gonna’ be a while before I’ve got the budget ta’ travel.” 

“What do you do?” 

She already knows that Dennis does the same thing John does which is... something related to maintenance... she’s not entirely sure and has never cared enough to ask. 

“I’m a barista right now but I’m in school fer clothing design.” 

“She’s in high school.” Dennis blurts out but for his part, Barry seems unphased. 

“What year?” 

“... I’m a senior.” 

“You got any plans fer after?” 

The question makes Casey’s guts twist but, again, she reminds herself that it’s just polite conversation. 

“..not really...” 

Refreshingly, Barry provides no insincere reassurance. 

“Sorry, I been doing all the talkin’, you must have questions?” 

Casey gropes in her mind but finds it surprisingly blank. She wished that this had happened either a few days before or a few days after this morning... she’s feeling numb and empty right now like she usually does after... that... happens. She winds up going with what she feels is the most obvious question. 

“How did you two meet?” 

Barry laughs. 

“I traded a vial’a my spit for a tote bag.” 

Casey can’t help but laugh at that because it’s just so unexpectedly bizarre. Barry explains. 

“There was this experiment we both participated in where they were trying ta’ match people with their soul mates based on DNA.” 

“...and it worked.” 

“For us at least.” He moves a little closer to Dennis, who still seems distracted by Casey... trying to untie that knot. Barry continues to carry the conversation. “You got anyone else in yer life... I mean, like, a boyfriend or a girlfriend?” 

“You guys are my only soul marks.” 

“I just meant that, if you had someone else, that wouldn’t be an issue. We’re not gonna’ ask you ta’ cut ties with anyone you care about.” 

Casey has no trouble believing that Barry means that, it’s just the ‘we’ part that’s dubious. She and Barry make small talk for a while as Dennis just sits there looking... confused... anxious? It's hard to tell and the ambiguity isn't helping Casey's own nerves. Eventually, Barry notices that she keeps checking the time on her phone. 

"If you've got somewhere you need to be, we can pick this up some other time." 

Casey feels bad, it's not that she doesn't want to talk to him, this is just the worst possible time for them to both suddenly show up. 

"I just... I'm really sorry but I have to be home by 4." 

She changed the time because she doesn't want anyone to see a strange man dropping her off and she has the feeling that Barry is going to offer. She also wants some time alone before having to face John or anyone else again. Joanne is usually home before the men are but if she isn't Casey will go for a walk fifteen minutes before they're due home and circle the block until she sees her car in the driveway. Regardless of rather or not she's actually fond of the woman, Casey has grown to regard her as a sheltering presence. Barry only looks a little disappointed. 

"Sure... I can give ya a lift home... unless you'd rather Dennis did." 

"We took the bus here." 

Casey had almost forgotten what Dennis’s voice sounded like. Barry looks understandably confused and Casey isn't sure what to say. There's not really any polite way of telling someone that you didn't want to be alone with their boyfriend because you thought that he might rape you. It surprises her when Dennis responds. 

"I saw her get on and just... followed." 

He seems to be aware of how creepy this sounds even as he says it and now it's Barry's turn to not know what to say... for a few seconds. 

"...ok... so I guess I can drop him off back at the warehouse and then take you home?" 

Casey does the math in her head to make sure that will give her enough time. 

"...ok." 

On the drive back to the warehouse Casey thinks about the fact that she and Dennis now have a tiny, hopefully, inconsequential secret between them. Why didn’t he just tell Barry the real reason that they took the bus? If it were anyone else she’d assume that he didn’t want to put her on the spot but nothing about him implies that he’d be that socially intuitive. Dennis and Barry are talking in the front seat but at a volume that implies she’s not meant to be listening. Still, something catches Casey’s attention. Dennis realizes that he hasn’t figured out where ‘the kid’ is going to be going tonight. 

“I thought you didn’t have kids?” 

“I don’t.” 

Barry fills in the gaps that Dennis leaves, Casey is beginning to detect a pattern. 

“A friend’a his... left town unexpectedly and left her kid with him. Jade’s gonna be around tomorrow and they’re both ok with him sleepin’ over. I think her and Orwell are treatin’ it like a test run fer when they have their own.” 

The second part was obviously addressed to Dennis, so Casey doesn’t ask who any of those people are or why ‘the kid’ can’t just stay with Barry and Dennis. They drop Dennis off and Barry tells Casey that she can come up front. The silence in the car is heavy but doesn’t last long. 

“... I swear he’s not in the habit of following people he doesn’t know onto public transportation... in fact, he usually avoids public transportation altogether and... and I know he’s not great with first impressions... he just... he gets nervous around new people...” 

“... does he wipe things off like that all the time?” 

Casey figures that if they’re going to be talking she may as well satisfy some of her curiosity. Barry hesitates as if he’s not sure he should answer. 

“He’s got OCD... it’s always there but it sorta... flares up when he gets anxious.” 

Casey feels guilty again. 

“I’m sorry I’m not... I’ve just been having a really bad day.” 

She chokes down the sob that tries to climb up her throat. Barry’s gaze flickers from the road to her for a second and his brow creases. 

“Don’t worry about it, Doll, I been havin’ a rough day too. Now that we found eachother we got plenty’a time to get ta’ know eachother and... I don’t want you to think yer whole life has ta’ change just cause we’re in it now... you don’t owe us anything.” 

If only he knew how much she WANTS her life to change... but Casey appreciates the sentiment. He wants her to know that he doesn’t plan on rushing her or pushing her into anything. Casey is relieved to see that there are no cars in the driveway when they pull up in front of the house. Before she gets out, she makes a decision. 

“Can we trade numbers? I don’t usually answer calls, but you can text me.” 

(She’ll have to keep her phone silenced around the house so John doesn’t get curious about who’s texting her.) 

Barry eagerly agrees and they put their numbers in each other’s phones. She feels like she should hug him or something before they part but she just... can’t. 

\----- 

Barry is laying awake later that night, feeling like he’s developing an ulcer with his brain going a mile a minute. He’s been given a lot to process. He guesses that the whole ‘my boyfriend killed his mother and spent most of his adolescence in a mental institution’ thing should be the top priority but... is it? Really, he had known as much about what she’d done to him as he possibly could without him coming out and saying it and... Barry likes to think he’s a compassionate person but he just can’t bring himself to regret that the sort of woman who’d scald her own child’s genitals isn’t in the world anymore... he just can’t. 

He supposes that when he’s really honest with himself what he’s really concerned about is the lasting effects that all that may have had on Dennis. A big part of him thinks it’s ridiculous to even contemplate that Dennis might be dangerous because... come on. When you get down under his admittedly very thick, very hard shell, Dennis is downright sweet... in his own way... at least to Barry... who is not a woman. That brings things around to Casey... young, shy... cute as a button Casey... Casey who Dennis had been so immediately drawn to that he’d spontaneously followed her onto a bus. 

Barry has already decided that he won’t be passing Casey’s number along to Dennis unless she specifically requests that he do so. Dennis had clearly not been comfortable being alone with her. Barry can’t decide if that should comfort or worry him but for the time being it’s probably a good thing. Barry doesn’t want to think that Dennis would EVER do anything to hurt the girl but... but... 

There’s a knock on Barry’s bedroom door and he’s actually kind of grateful for the disruption. It’s Jade... she looks worried. 

“You ok?” 

“What did Orwell tell you?” 

“He didn’t wanna’ tell me anything but then I reminded him that I know his dad didn’t represent shoplifters... the most I could get outta’ him was that it happened when Dennis was really young and it was more or less self-defense.” 

“But yer worried?” 

She looks incredulous. 

“Yeah! If he hurts you I’ll cut his dick off an’ jam it down his throat.” 

Of course, Jade would be worried for Barry’s safety and not her own. She has a charming though sometimes self-destructive tendency to view herself as invulnerable. 

“He’s not gonna’ hurt me.” 

Barry is at least confident in that. 

“Ya’ say that now and then the next thing ya’ know yer a true-crime documentary.” 

Barry can’t help but laugh, he pulls her down onto the bed with him. 

“I got nothin’ ta worry about with you in my corner.” 

He cuddles up beside her and kisses her neck. She’s still a little tense. He decides that he won’t be telling her about his other concerns just yet. She turns her head and kisses him and then they make out and until she’s on top of him. 

“You told him, right? About us bein’ a package deal.” 

He runs his hands up and down her thighs. 

“He knows yer not goin’ anywhere.” 

“Damn right.” 

She leans down and kisses him, sliding her hand under his shirt. 

Jade’s parents were a little like her and Barry. They were a male and female omega who met when they were very young. Jade was born while they were both still in high school but they’d made it work. Jade has vague memories from when she was very young of the three of them living together, poor but happy. Then, they’d both found their SEPERATE alphas who had not gotten along. 

They’d wound up living in two separate houses between which Jade got passed back and forth until her father’s alpha had had to move out of state for work. Eventually, when she was around twelve, Jade’s mother’s alpha had started trying to molest her... she made it clear that he only ever TRIED, and when Jade had tried to tell her mother about it she’d simply refused to believe her and so Jade had run away. She’d made it all the way to the house of her father’s alpha... where it had been made abundantly clear that she was not welcome. With nowhere else to go, she’d lived on her own for two years until she was eventually picked up for ‘soliciting’ and wound up in the group home where she’d met Barry. The two of them had eventually agreed that no matter what happened they would stay TOGETHER. 

She’d explained all this to Orwell when he’d asked if she’d liked to move in with him, which she’d been hesitant to do. Orwell had been understanding about it which is also probably why he’s made a point of showing that he isn’t threatened by Dennis, to put Jade at ease. 

After they have sex they curl up together. Jade isn’t much for cuddling but she allows it when she can tell that Barry needs it. She’ll stay until he falls asleep and then go to her own room. Barry eventually drifts off feeling at least somewhat comforted by the reminder that, no matter what else happens, there will always be at least one constant in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been having a bad time mental health-wise lately and it's been giving me writer's block but I did an hour of cardio today and that seemed to shake something loose.


	34. Controlled Exposure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dennis is freaking out.

Dennis texts Barry after enough time has passed that he’s probably gotten Casey home and asks if he should come back to Orwell’s house, assuming that he’ll want him to come back over and feeling that he should because of the kid. When Barry says that he has an early morning tomorrow and would be ok with Dennis staying where he is, Dennis has a conflicted response. Barry’s never declined an opportunity to see him before but he tells himself that it would be petty to be hurt by that and a part of him thinks that it's probably for the best that he spend tonight alone. He is still feeling the aftershock of being around Casey. It’s hard to explain but... he can only compare it to the first time he saw a woman (other than his mother) naked. 

Shortly after he’d gotten out of the institution, he’d crept out of the house and gone to a strip club because he was TWENTY-ONE and had never done anything like that and he thought that if he did he would at least be less of a freak in the one respect. There hadn’t been much there that really affected him until he’d seen ‘Stardust’ who was clearly (hopefully) a recent highschool graduate. Looking at her had made him feel like the ground had dropped out from under him leaving him falling through infinite space. 

Dennis isn’t ONLY attracted to teenage girls, for example, a lot of men find Hedwig’s mother attractive and he knows why... he’s not blind. It’s just that a girl like Casey has more of an effect on him wearing multiple layers of clothing than Crystal could if she were completely naked. Just looking at her evokes a feeling of precarious fragility in him that is simultaneously thrilling and terrifying and makes the comparably muted, purely physical lust that he might be able to get himself to feel for a more mature woman feel like a sort of lie that he's telling himself and he's never been comfortable with lying. 

Honestly, the reason it had taken him so long to identify his bodies visceral response to Barry as sexual attraction was that he didn't have to force it and it wasn't accompanied by fear and it didn't make him hate himself and in his experience at least one of those three things always accompanied arousal. Once he got past the ingrained assumption that OF COURSE, he wasn't "like that" because for some reason he wasn't "supposed" to be and managed to acknowledge those feelings for what they were he'd been... relieved. He’d started to think that maybe, in just this ONE respect, he’d get to be normal. Maybe he could just have a normal relationship with someone he cared about who cared about him and he could be happy without hurting anyone or feeling guilty. Maybe he had just been a homosexual this whole time and had been repressing it and his... interest in teenage girls was PURELY psychological... maybe it would even eventually go away. 

Then Casey had... happened. Casey, with her perfect little rosebud lips and her big, deep eyes and her silken hair and her voice that wound into his brain like a vine. She is radiant and he is miserable and at first, he wants to be angry at her for disrupting his life once he had FINALLY started to find some sort of happiness but then he remembers that this is HIS fault. She had literally fled the room to avoid him and he had FOLLOWED her like the creep that he is. It had been smart of her not to tell him where she lives and to have Barry bring her home because if he knew where she was he doesn’t think he’d be able to resist the compulsion to go there later tonight and... and... what? He doesn’t know what he’d do and that terrifies him. 

Before he drives home, he sits in his truck in the warehouse parking lot and calls Dr. Fletcher. She doesn’t answer so he leaves a message and then sits in the parking lot for another half an hour until she calls back. His initial explanation is so rushed and scattered that at first, she seems worried that he’s done something bad but then he goes back and clarifies that they’d just gone to a diner and she’d agreed to go and Barry had been there. There’s audible relief in her voice when she speaks again. 

“Alright... how young is she?” 

“Seventeen.” 

He feels flush as if he’s just said a dirty word. There’s silence on the phone, she’s thinking. 

“First off, I’d like to say that it doesn’t seem to me that you did anything wrong... you understand that, right?” 

As he realizes that she’s right, relief washes over Dennis. In all his panic he’d forgotten that he really HADN’T done anything wrong... nothing bad had happened... yet. 

“Yeah.” 

“Good, and I think you showed a healthy consciousness of your own limitations by bringing Barry in. He knows about your invasive thoughts, doesn’t he?” 

“... he does.” 

At this point, Barry knows about his ‘invasive thoughts” in far more detail than even Dr. Fletcher herself does... there are some things that Dennis just can’t bring himself to openly discuss with any woman. 

“Well I think that that puts you in a position to ask him for support.” 

“What’d you mean?” 

“If you’re not comfortable being alone with Casey, I think that you should tell him that because based on what you’ve told me about him I think he’d be more than willing to act as a buffer and that would give you the opportunity to interact with someone who triggers you in a safe and controlled environment." 

"What if I just didn't see 'er anymore?" 

He blurts it out before he can stop himself. There's another long silence. 

"But she's also one of Barry's soulmates..." 

"...yeah." 

"And do you think that he would be content to simply not be involved with her?" 

"...no." 

Now Dennis feels stupid for even making that suggestion because of course Barry will want to get to know her and knowing who she is and that she doesn't even live far away and not being able to see her would make him miserable. All this assumes that Barry would even except being told to stay away from her and he DEFINITELY wouldn't. 

"And do you think it would be realistic to expect her to be a significant part of Barry's life without you ever having contact with her?" 

"...no." 

Dennis sighs. 

"And, even if it were, I don't think that that's what you really want." 

She seems to be waiting for him to speak but he can't. He can't tell her that what he really wants is one of the thing's he's afraid of. Eventually she fills the silence. 

"Did she seem particularly interested in rushing things romantically?" 

"...no." 

"Well, that lowers the stakes, doesn't it?" 

"How do ya mean?" 

"Well, if she's not going to initiate anything and you resolve that you won't either and the two of you are never even left alone, then there's no real danger, is there?" 

Dennis has to think about this a moment because it feels like she HAS to be missing something. While he's raking over what she just said in his mind, she goes on. 

"Honestly, I think that even if the prospect of this developing into something more were completely removed, having controlled exposure to someone like her and getting to actually KNOW her as a person can only do you good." 

"...but... what if I..." 

He can't finish that sentence because he's not sure what he might do and he doesn't want to try too hard to come up with examples because once that part of his brain gets going it's hard to stop it. 

"Dennis, I think that your current coping mechanism of just avoiding triggers has made this whole issue bigger in your mind. I think you need to keep reminding yourself that you've never actually hurt anyone like Casey... your mother wasn't like Casey." 

They agree that they'll discuss this further when he comes for his scheduled appointment. He drives home feeling calmer but by no means calm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Mentions of past abuse and murder.


	35. Jealousy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dennis tells Patricia about Casey and also continues to freak out.

Later that evening when Dennis is eating dinner in the usual fashion, just he and Miss Patricia in the kitchen with the door locked so that the few others who do eat dinner in the kitchen can’t enter until he’s done eating. Dennis had been seeing Barry for months before Miss Patricia even knew he existed and Dennis would even have preferred delaying her finding out longer. By contrast, he feels like he NEEDS to tell her about Casey IMMEDIATELY. She’s always had the ability to make him behave when he doubted his own fortitude. As he’d gotten older and his... inappropriate predilections had not gone away and he’d started to fear that that may mean that he had it in him to become like his mother, he’d been boundlessly grateful for her involvement in his life because he knew that she wouldn’t LET him become that. 

A few years ago there had been an incident. A tenant that they had at the time had been estranged from his pack but his daughter, Marcia, would come to visit him at the house some times. Marcia had been fourteen at the time and was a sweet, well-mannered... warmly luminous girl and Dennis had thought he was in love with her. He hadn’t thought that she was one of his soulmates but back then he’d been assuming that he would never find them and that the only love that he’d ever have was an unrequited one. He became infatuated without ever even speaking to her, at least not at length. 

Their one social interaction had consisted of her asking him if there was a bathroom on the ground floor of the house and him telling her that there wasn’t even thought there was. At around three the next morning Miss Patricia had found him in that bathroom tearing tiles off the wall because he’d been unable to sleep and it had suddenly occurred to him that they needed replacing. After a few similar incidents she had announced to the tenants that something in the house had been stolen and, until it was returned, no one was allowed to bring guests in. The item in question was of course never returned because it didn’t exist and so the policy is still in place to this day. Dennis had felt horrible about it but not enough so to try to convince her to change it. 

She hadn’t trusted him to control himself, that was what had really stuck with him, and rather than confront him about it, she’d simply removed the temptation. He didn’t know how to feel about that but ultimately he’d settled on gratitude. Miss Patricia herself had only been fourteen when she’d been married and though she would freely admit that her husband had not been a good man, she didn’t seem to see the age she’d been at the time of her marriage as part of the problem. Similarly, she didn’t seem to see Dennis’s interest in young girls as a problem in and of itself. Her worry seemed to be more about whether or not he would get himself into trouble by acting on his compulsions than rather he would hurt someone else by doing so. 

It had bothered him an unexpected amount that she wasn’t more bothered by having been married off (someone had to have at the very least LET her get married if not made her) at such a young age. He’d wondered at the time, while he’d still been in the institution, what sort of piece of shit would not only marry a girl so young but also abuse her. After he’d gotten out and started to have his ‘intrusive thoughts’ he’d started to worry that maybe he was that sort of piece of shit. Could he really say, in all confidence, that if he’d lived in a time when he could have pursued a girl like Marcia without being condemned for it he wouldn’t have? That is assuming that in this hypothetical scenario, he would also have the social skills necessary for such an undertaking. And who’s to say what he would have done once he had her... if he knew she couldn’t get away... 

He’s grown to believe that Miss Patricia must have become a nun because she’d had such a rough go of it with men when she was young and that thought was profoundly sad. In time, that’s become a portion of his sense of responsibility to her. He feels like he needs to make up for what the things that this man who was probably like him did to her. His guilt isn’t eased by the fact that her instinct had been to protect him. There are things for which he knows that she judges others very harshly that she seems all too willing to forgive him for and he doesn’t feel that he deserves that. 

As he’s eating, she asks what’s troubling him because, of course, she notices that he’s troubled... she always does. He thinks that he shouldn’t tell her but then he just... does. The words come out like water from a burst dam. 

“I...we found our other soul mate.” 

“... I take it that by ‘we’ you mean yourself and Barry?” 

He nods and she just waits for him to elaborate. 

“Her name’s Casey... she’s a high school senior... seventeen.” 

She looks a mix of worried and irritated. 

“And how do the two of you intend to approach the situation?” 

“I-I don’t know.” 

He suddenly feels very small and lost. She looks at him pityingly. 

“... are the girl's parents aware that you’ve had contact with her?” 

She’s already thinking about protecting him, shielding him from the consequences of... whatever he might do. 

“She lives with her uncle... I work with him... we don’t get along.” 

She mulls this over a moment. 

“Dear... it wouldn't do to have you getting into trouble... surely you can wait a year.” 

“We don’t plan on... makin’ things... physical...” 

“It’s not the sort of thing that one tends to plan.” 

She sounds irritated now. 

“I talked ta’ Dr. Fletcher... we decided I’m not gonna’ be alone with her at first.” 

“Suppose she wants to be alone with you?” 

He doesn’t know what to say to that because he honestly hadn’t considered it. She’d seemed very uncomfortable for the brief time they’d been alone. 

“I don’t think she’d want to.” 

She looks annoyed as if he were hopelessly naive. 

“They’re lascivious by nature... eventually she won't be able to help it and she’s bound to become competitive with Barry.” 

He supposes that she knows what she’s talking about. Her husband had had three omegas and all but one of them had been as uncivil to her as they could be without angering their Alpha. They’d seen her as lesser than them for not being able to have children and resented her for any attention that he paid her. He thinks that this is why she resents omegas but... this isn’t the same... it CAN’T be. 

“She’s Barry’s soulmate too.” 

“And you don’t assume that that will cause any problems?” 

She waits for an answer but that’s another thing he hadn’t considered. She sighs. 

“She’ll expect to rank above him and resent him if she doesn’t.” 

He wonders why she would be concerned about that... she doesn't even like Barry. 

“I don’t think that she’s like that.” 

“They’re all like that.” 

He feels himself starting to get angry and takes a few deep breaths. He’s only just met the girl, it wouldn’t make sense for him to take her side against Miss Patricia. 

“Well things aren’t gonna’ be progressin’ fer at least a year... I promise.” 

As he says that, he’s suddenly sure that it won’t. He always keeps his promises to Miss Patricia. She keeps him honest. 

“... I’d like you to bring her by the house.” 

Dennis supposes that that makes sense. She wants to know exactly what sort of trouble he might be getting into. He just feels like that’s the sort of thing he needs to build up to. Casey likely assumes that his home life is very different than it actually is. For instance, she likely assumes that he at least pays rent wherever he is and that he and Barry live together... because that’s how it should be. 

“She doesn’t even know what... the situation is yet.” 

“I’d be glad to explain it to her.” 

Dennis frustratedly runs a hand over his scalp. 

“We ain’t even talked ta’ her more than once yet.” 

She huffs and looks so anxious that for a moment he feels tempted to take her into his arms. He gets that impulse from time to time but he knows better than to actually do it. He feels bad about all of the stress he’s been causing her lately. He wishes that he could talk to Dr. Fletcher about how she’s been but he knows that she wouldn’t want Dr. Fletcher knowing anything about her. He just doesn’t know how to help her himself but he knows that she needs help. 

He can’t sleep that night and so he goes for a run and then takes a shower and then he bleaches every surface in the kitchen. Eventually, he does sleep but it's only for a few fitful hours. He dreams but the dream is different now. The little girl is now Casey and he's trying to find her in the forest but he knows that she's deliberately evading him. His only means of locating her is by following a trail of her blood and he knows that he needs to reach her before the thing that caused the bleeding does. 

He awakes at the usual time feeling less rested than he did before he went to sleep. Suddenly, he really wants to hear Casey’s voice. It’s a purely physical craving, like a smoker would get for nicotine. He goes about his morning routine with it itching in the back of his mind. When he encounters John Cooke later that day he finds that his loathing of the man is now tinged with a sort of jealousy. 

This disgusting creature gets to hear Casey’s voice every day and sleep under the same roof as her every night and he can’t possibly DESERVE that. In fact, Dennis is somehow certain that he doesn’t. In fact, he now feels that just by existing in the same space as Casey this man is somehow violating her and deserves to be punished for it. Dennis knows these feelings are irrational but he still has to avoid being completely alone with the man for the rest of the shift because the urge to lay hands on him is just short of unbearable. It’s a good thing that he already has a reputation for being short with people because he’s certain he couldn’t speak at length with John Cooke without telling him that his very existence is an affront to decency. 

When he gets home he calls Crystal and is perhaps a bit harsher than necessary in telling her that she needs to come home. She can’t just run off and abandon her kid whenever he becomes an inconvenience. She is a MOTHER for fuck sake and she had better start acting like it or next time he’s going to let Miss Patricia call social services. He says this knowing that it isn’t true, he would never do that to the kid. When he hangs up he feels guilty because she had started to cry at the end and he’d felt nothing but irritation in the moment. 

Feeling drained after the bout of rage he’d experienced during the conversation dies down, he lays down on his bed. He intends to only lie there a few minutes but the next thing he knows he’s being woken up by his phone ringing and it’s dark outside his window. It’s Barry but for some reason, it feels like he’s calling from very far away and that makes Dennis want to cry. He doesn’t though and he tries to sound normal on the phone. 

“I got ahold ‘a Crystal, she should be back sometime tomorrow.” 

“Alright, things are goin’ ok here... I think the kid might be kinda in love with Jade.” 

Dennis tries to force a laugh. 

“Is it ok if I come over?” 

There’s a pause during which Dennis is irrationally certain that Barry is going to say no and that he’s finally realized that their relationship is more work than it’s worth and that he never wants to see Dennis again and then Barry and Jade and Casey will live happily ever after without him and he’ll eventually die alone... as God intended. Of course, that doesn’t happen. Barry says that of course, it’s alright if he comes over but that they need to talk. This is fine, Dennis actually desperately wants to talk to Barry all of the sudden because for some reason he feels like there’s a risk that at some point in the future he may lose that privilege.


	36. Dance Dance Revolution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hedwig wants to live in Orwell's house. Dennis has a second dinner. Barry and Denis discuss certain raw topics.

When Barry answers the door, Dennis immediately kisses him. It’s as much to reassure the Omega as it is to reassure himself that he hasn’t lost his ability to find Barry attractive just because Casey is now a factor. He hasn’t, in fact, the touch is like a balm on his raw nerves. He only restrains himself from going further because he knows that they’re not alone in the house. Barry leads him into one of the sitting rooms where Jade and Hedwig are playing a game that Dennis only recognizes as Dance Dance Revolution from Hedwig having talked about it being his favorite game at the arcade in the mall where his mother would sometimes leave him for entire days during the summer. 

“I thought you said we needed ta’ talk...?” Dennis asks as quietly as he can as Barry coaxes him to sit down on the couch with him. 

“You can sleepover, right?” 

“Right.” 

“Ok, so we can talk later when we’re alone.” 

Dennis begrudgingly accepts this, if something terrible is going to happen he’d rather get it over with quickly. For a while, they just watch the others play the game. As usual, Mr. Orwell is nowhere in sight and has probably yet to make an appearance. Dennis knows next to nothing about what the man’s job actually entails, but it seems to eat up nearly every waking hour of his time. Barry has said that he has to put out books on a regular basis as one of the conditions of his tenure at the college but that he’s also just generally a ‘workaholic.’ Dennis hadn’t thought that people with that much money bothered working at all. 

Eventually Hedwig notices Dennis sitting behind him and loses interest in the game in favor of telling Dennis everything that’s happened in the time since they last saw eachother. Mr. Orwell’s house has ‘like, a hundred rooms’ in it and there’s one that’s got a bunch of swords (Barry corrects that these are ‘fencing foils’) in it but there all in locked cases and Jade wouldn’t let him play with them. Mr. Orwell learned how to ‘fight with swords’ (how to fence) in college but his brother is better at it than him (Dennis isn’t sure who Hedwig is referring to here because as far as he knows Orwell has more than one brother.) There’s a lion in Poppy’s room that Mr. Orwell’s grandfather killed but Poppy doesn’t like to kill animals and that’s why she owns a zoo (Dennis has gatherers at least enough from conversations to know that this is referring to Orwell’s older sister who owns an animal sanctuary.) Jade took Hedwig to the mall (Dennis would later learn that this was the only way she could get him to stop obsessing over the ‘swords’) and they went to the arcade and Jade bought a game for him. Here Jade interjects. 

“Hey, I bought it for ME, I’m just lettin’ you use it cause I don’t wanna’ play alone and Barry’s no good at it.” 

“I can pay you back for it.” Dennis says, suddenly feeling self-conscious and also having no idea if he actually can. 

“Shut up.” Jade says in a way that Dennis has learned by now is meant to be playful. She makes Dennis nervous because he can’t tell if she dislikes him or not. He’s also not sure if he likes her, but this doesn’t seem to have any effect on her nerves. If he does wind up settling on disliking her, he doesn’t intend to say anything about it, especially not to Barry. Before Hedwig can start off on another stream of information, Mr. Orwell comes home. 

Hedwig clams up around him the way he tends to around most male Alphas who aren’t Dennis. Dennis hopes that this habit is just something that he learned from his mother (he has overheard her before, stressing the importance of being extra well behaved around Mr. Marco so that he’ll let them move into the house) and not the result of something else. Crystal may be negligent but Dennis doesn’t think that she’d ever let anyone lay hands on the boy. Mr. Orwell pours himself a drink (always a small amount of some sort of brown liqueur and he never has more than one) and the conversation turns to what to order for dinner. They usually eat late here because they wait for Mr. Orwell to come home and it’s almost always take-out because no one in this house particularly enjoys cooking and when you have so much money there’s no need to argue over who SHOULD do the cooking. 

Eventually Orwell suggests that the kid go look through the take-out menus in the drawer in the kitchen and Jade goes with him to show him where they are. When it’s just the three men in the room, Mr. Orwell turns his attention to Dennis. 

“Any word from his mother?” 

Dennis feels self-conscious again. He and this man barely know eachother and he’s brought a stray child into his house, of course, he was going to take issue eventually. 

“She should be back by tomorrow b-but I can take ‘im back ta’ the boarding house tonight if ya’ want.” 

“I don’t mind him staying here if Jade doesn’t, I’m just... curious about the situation... does she often leave him alone with you unexpectedly?” 

“Eh... from time ta’ time... I’m very sorry, I wouldn’t have even brought him here if I didn’t have work...” 

Barry puts a hand on Dennis’s arm. 

“Nobody’s mad at you or anything.” 

“Of course not.” Mr. Orwell confirms. “And it’s not as if this situation is fair to you.” 

Dennis doesn’t know what to say to that because he hadn’t even been thinking about it in those terms, he’d been more focused on how it wasn’t fair to the kid. 

“I explained the situation with Rico’s pack.” 

Dennis isn’t sure how to feel about Barry telling Mr. Orwell something like that because he doesn’t know if Mr. Orwell is the type to get the authorities involved. He also doesn’t like not knowing how much else Barry has told the other Alpha. For instance, maybe it’s petty, but Dennis would prefer that this man who owns a literal mansion not know that he lives in a single room. Mr. Orwell seems to pick up on the fact that Dennis is having difficulty figuring out what to say. 

“As I said, I don’t mind him being here as long as someone is available to look after him I just... I just think that this sort of instability can’t be good for him.” 

“He wouldn’t wanna’ leave his mother.” 

Dennis is surprised by the defensiveness in his own voice... he doesn’t know why he’s so tense all of a sudden. Before things can go any further, Jade and the boy return to the room. They wind up getting Mexican. Dennis has one taco because he doesn’t want to tell them that he already ate. They eat in front of the television, which seems to be another common practice around here. 

They’re watching something on one of the music channels that Hedwig likes and Dennis is barely paying attention until the screen goes black at the beginning of a commercial. It stays black for what feels like a long time until a female voice with an English accent says. 

“I’m going to put a pretty flower in your hair... to show how special you are.” 

Dennis feels an inexplicable little tug of recognition at the sound of that voice but when the screen lights up (in a camera effect mean to simulate someone opening their eyes) he sees that it’s just that actress who’s going to be starring in that movie that Barry and Jade want to see. She’s kneeling over the person whose perspective the camera is meant to show. She looks ragged and sickly but is smiling in a dreamy sort of way. It cuts abruptly away from her to an older nun talking to a group of reporters (Barry seems excited about the actress playing the older nun) and then to a series of other, different people who seem to be talking about a murder. At the end, it cuts back to the actress from the beginning sitting in what looks like a police interrogation room, a man who is presumably behind the camera is explaining to her that if she doesn’t give him information she’s going to be treated as “at least an accessory to murder.” She looks thoughtfully into the camera for an uncomfortably long time but as soon as she opens her mouth to speak it cuts away again to a black screen featuring the film’s title. 

Jade and Barry erupt into a conversation that fills the rest of the evening until it’s time for the kid to go to bed. He protests (likely wanting to overhear more of the ‘grownup talk’) until Dennis agrees to go upstairs with him to see the lion. Dennis goes up to tuck him in and, sure enough, there is a taxidermied lion next to the bed....going by the collar that someone has put around its neck, its name is Brutus. As he’s on his way out of the room, Hedwig calls after him to ask him if he thinks “me and mom could come with you when you move in here?” All Dennis can manage to say is that Mr. Rico probably wouldn’t like that very much. 

\------ 

Even under the circumstances, it’s hard for Barry not to get at least a little excited over the trailer. It’s just a teaser but there’s still a lot to unpack there. For one thing, even from the little bit shown, K.Stew is a lot closer to how Violet was in real life than Vivian Beck (the actress from the mini-series) was. She still only looks kind of like Violet but a lot of work has clearly gone into styling and dressing her appropriately. Barry has read a lot of articles talking about the costume design for the movie and apparently, a lot of research was done into the sort of clothing that a Catholic novice of the specific order Violet came from would have worn even down to making sure that no inappropriate fabrics or dies were used. This is a good sign, considering the fact that the main character in the mini-series spent the whole thing in what looked like a ‘naughty school girl’ costume from Spirit Halloween. 

Jade thinks that it looks like K.Stew lost weight for the part but Barry thinks it’s just as likely that they used makeup to make her look gaunter. According to what Barry’s read, the killing spree had been brought to an end by Violet getting pneumonia. The oldest of the Omegas in the pack had brought her to the hospital and the nurse who examined her had said that ‘the girl was noticeably underweight’ and that that was what had made her suspicious... that and the ‘ligature marks’ on Violet’s arms. There has been a lot of speculation online about rather or not they’ll show how she got pneumonia (supposedly she’d aspirated water into her lungs while the Beast had been doing some sort of ‘baptism ritual’ where he held her head underwater) and the ligature marks and there’s the usual debate about rather it would be exploitive to show that in too much detail. Apparently, most people can excuse showing people getting killed in an R-rated movie but get a little queasy at the prospect of the ritualistic torture of an underaged girl being shown. In the miniseries, all the injuries had been implied to be the result of kinky dubcon sex between Violet and the Beast (except the pneumonia and her being underweight, both of which were never even brought up) but they’re definitely not going to be going in that direction with the movie. 

All thoughts of anything other than the coming conversation flee his mind as Dennis comes back downstairs looking a little sad for some reason. Barry had expected being around Dennis to feel different now that he knows that he’s committed murder and been institutionalized but he finds that it just doesn’t. He tells himself not to let his guard down completely though, he’s heard plenty of horror stories about Omegas ignoring obvious red flags to be with their soul mates and winding up in abusive relationships... or worse. That’s why he’s secretly grateful for the fact that Jade has grown a bit warier of Dennis, she won’t let Barry get himself killed. 

Barry meets Dennis halfway as he’s on his way back to the living room and instead leads him upstairs to his bedroom. As soon as they’re alone, Dennis kisses him again and then pushes him down onto the bed. Barry isn’t particularly turned on at the moment but he lets it happen because he’s learned through experience that Dennis is most inclined to talk openly after he’s just had an orgasm. In spite of himself, Barry winds up enjoying it, and afterward, Dennis lies there holding him as usual. He finds himself hesitant to ruin the afterglow but, to his surprise, Dennis does. 

“So... we need ta’ talk?” 

Barry takes a deep breath and rolls over onto his back so that they can see each other’s faces. He decides to start with the thing that’s probably at the forefront of Dennis’s mind right now. 

“How are we feelin’ about Casey?” 

Dennis swallows and suddenly can’t meet Barry’s gaze. 

“... we just met...” 

“Ok, so what’s your first impression?” 

It takes him a long time to respond and when he does it isn’t a straightforward answer. 

“I-I talked ta’ Dr. Fletcher and we agreed that it’d be best if me an’ her weren’t alone together... at first.” 

“Alright, and why do you and Dr. Fletcher think that?” 

Dennis grows noticeably more nervous. 

“You don’t have ta’... worry...” 

“I believe you but I’d like ta’ know what I’m not worrying about because it seems like you’re worrying about it for me.” 

Dennis looks confused. 

“You seemed really uncomfortable around her and I think it might have something to do with that movie you showed me.” 

Dennis swallows. 

“I promise... I won’t...” 

“Ok, ok.” Barry brings a hand up to stroke the back of his neck. “I’m not so much worried that you’ll hurt her as I’m... concerned about how those... feelings you have are gonna’ affect your ability to have a relationship with her. I mean... we’re supposed to spend our lives together and that’s gonna’ be kind of hard on you if you just see her as...” 

Barry’s not sure how to put it because what he means is ‘a fetish object’ but that sounds too harsh. He decides to go at it from another angle. 

“Have you ever had ANY relationships with women other than yer mom, yer doctor, and Patricia?” 

“... there’s Crystal...” 

“Yeah but you don’t even like her.” 

Dennis doesn’t argue with that. 

“I just... I don’t have any male friends either.” 

That is inescapably true. 

“Right but... you’ve told me things you haven’t told yer psychiatrist... you think maybe that’s because there are some ways that you have an easier time relating ta’ men?” 

“...I guess...” Dennis looks away from him again and there’s defensiveness creeping into his tone. “Listen...I-I don’t... hate women... I trust Miss Patricia more than anybody.” 

It takes a conscious effort on Barry’s part not to cringe at that. Patricia herself is certainly no feminist; Barry once overheard her talking with Mr. Anthony about how women with children should not be ALLOWED to have jobs. To be fair, she also thinks that Betas shouldn’t be allowed to have jobs either (because they should all be turned over to the church at birth) so at least her prejudice cuts both ways. 

“That’s something I am worried about. You KNOW Patricia’s not gonna’ like her and it’s probably gonna’ be worse than it was with me.” 

“Why would it be?” 

Barry sighs. 

“Think about it, stud, what’s the most obvious difference between me and Casey?” 

Dennis brow furrows. 

“You think Miss Patricia hates women?” 

“I think that she’ll see Casey as more of a threat than me and... considering how much you trust her, I’m just... worried.” 

To his surprise, Dennis does not question or refute this. Instead, he goes quiet for a while again and when he goes on his voice is quiet and serious. 

“I’m gonna’ tell you somethin’ but you’ve gotta’ PROMISE that you’ll never bring it up ta’ Miss Patricia. She CAN’T know that you know this.” 

Barry swallows. 

“Alright, I promise.” 

Dennis takes a deep breath. 

“When she was about fourteen, she was married to an Alpha who... hurt ‘er a lot... the way my mother hurt me...” 

Dennis’s voice breaks and tears actually well up in his eyes, this is the first time Barry has ever seen this happen. The Alpha closes his eyes and breaths deep until the wave of emotion passes. 

“He had three Omegas too, one’a them, the oldest one, treated her alright but the other two were... awful to her. I guess they saw ‘er as competition and they didn’t even think she was good enough that they should have ta’ compete with ‘er...” 

Dennis chokes up again. This is a lot for Barry to digest because... HOW was Patricia married? Mr. Anthony had said that she was a ‘lifer’ but... maybe he was just assuming that. If the story is true, it certainly does... add a new dimension to things. 

“Well... can you see why that might make her... distrustful of people like Casey?” 

After another LONG pause, Dennis hesitantly nods. 

“And you’ve spent a lot of time with her so I worry you might have... internalized some’a that.” 

Dennis can’t seem to come up with a response to that. The silence sits heavily between them until Barry eventually decides that if he’s in for a penny he’s in for a pound. 

“There’s also... your mom.” 

Dennis’s eyes snap back to Barry’s face as his brow furrows. They have never explicitly discussed what Dennis’s mother did to him but for some time it’s been silently understood between them. The Alpha’s body tangibly tenses but Barry decides to plunge forward... whatever is going to happen is going to happen. 

“I’m just sayin’ that if... that... happened ta’ me... I can see how I’d have trouble letting a woman get close ta’ me.” 

Dennis moves away from him and sits up, running a hand over his scalp. 

“She’s not my mother.” 

The defensiveness has increased, Barry proceeds with caution. 

“Right but, I mean, we all at least initially learn how to relate ta’ other people from our parents and I just worry... I just worry that you’re not gonna’ know how ta’ relate ta’ her and that might cause some... friction.” 

Dennis suddenly looks sad again. 

“I wish I hadn’t found ‘er.” 

He murmurs it under his breath and sounds SO hopeless. Barry sits up and hugs Dennis’s arm, leaning his head on his shoulder. 

“While I’m glad ya’ did and I think eventually you will be too. We just have ta’ take it slow and... communicate, ok? If you’re havin’ trouble, I want you ta’ tell me about it.” 

Dennis sighs and shudders. 

“And you won’t leave me alone with her?” 

It hurts that he sounds genuinely frightened by the prospect of being alone with the girl. 

“I won’t.” 

He gets Dennis to lie back down and they hold eachother again. Barry thinks that if he’s going to tell Dennis that he knows about the ‘matricide’, it has to happen now... it’s now or never. He slowly drifts to sleep with that thought in his head.


End file.
